To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child
by Yemi Hikari
Summary: Zuko knows from Azula's own mouth that Fire Lord Azulon ordered Ozai to sacrifice his first born son in order that Ozai might redeem himself in Azulon's eyes. He in fact expects his father to kill him, but something else happens instead. (AU spinning off my one-shot To Lose or to Gain.)
1. Azula Always Lies

_Disclaimer – I don't own Avatar: The Last Airbender. This AU is a spin off of my one-shot "To Lose is to Gain". It you want to read that first the ID number is 13288571. Just replace the ID number for this story with that number._

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Azula Always Lies_**

"Azula always lies."

The mantra repeated over and over on Zuko's tongue, slipping out in a knotted manner as the eleven-year-old fought back the fearful thoughts which plagued his mind. In the back of his head he remembered his father glibly telling him how he almost threw him over the wall simply because he didn't have the eyes of a Firebender, yet he constantly felt the man's disappointment leveed at his young shoulders.

He didn't know if he ever got any sleep.

A knock on the door to his room made his head jolt up from his half stupor, but his small hands gripped onto the silken sheets in frustration. His entire body shook with fright thinking the person who came as the sunlight from the early morning dawn filtered in through the windows was in fact his father come to kill him. The young prince almost sprung from the bed in terror, yet in the back of his mind he knew full well Azula loved torturing him.

The doors to his room opened revealing a servant and two soldiers on either side of the doorway. Zuko swallowed, wondering if his father was summoning him to be killed. The female servant bowed their head towards him. "Prince Zuko, if you would follow me please."

Zuko swallowed again and slid out of the bed. He fell instep behind the servant. Every so often he would glance over his shoulder at the soldiers while his small hands tucked behind his back. His eyes traveled towards the courtyard and caught sight of Azula playing with her friends while their mother watched on. Briefly Ursa glanced up at him, yet quickly adverted her eyes from his. Zuko's mouth dropped. "_Aren't mothers supposed to be protective of their young? Mother said so. Mother never lies._"

Ursa's action caught the attention of Azula who looked up at him. A shiver ran down Zuko's face upon seeing the look of disgust plastered across her face, but the fire in the palm of her hands grew bigger. He opened his mouth to say something only for her to turn her nose up into the air.

"Prince Zuko." Zuko's eyes turned towards the servant in confusion. "We must keep moving."

The preteen felt his shoulders hunch up slightly before he started following the servant again. Out of the corner of his eye he saw his sister start tormenting her friends with her Firebending with even more ghusto. A sigh escaped Zuko's lips while his head hung low, yet he continued walking with as much dignity as he could muster.

Eventually they left the household of Prince Ozai, son of Lord Azulon while Zuko's mind contemplated whether or not he was being taken to the slaughter. His small hands twisted slightly, and his mouth clenched together. Bile started coming up his throat, yet he felt as if he might wet himself. In the back of his mind he kept repeating the fact Azula always lied, yet he couldn't keep the doubts at bay.

That was until they took a turn towards the household of Crown Prince Iroh. Zuko's mood brightened slightly, but his head glanced around. His mouth opened. "Is U…" The young prince stopped himself. "Is General Iroh back?"

The servant glanced back at him. "He will be back in a day or two, Prince Zuko."

"Why…" Zuko's head turned toward the ground remembering it wasn't his place to question anything which went on. A shudder went down his spine wondering if perhaps the sacrifice would occur in his Uncle Iroh's household to appease some kind of spirit before his uncle arrived home. "_Come on Zuko, you're just being paranoid._"

"Prince Zuko…"

Zuko felt himself crash into the back of the servant but felt the soft silk of the servants clothing against his face. He found himself quickly backing away, but a slight brush crept across his face. The servant turned and looked down at him. "Esteemed Prince Zuko, you are right in being paranoid. Afterall, there are those out there who would attempt to assassinate any of the royal family, so you must remember to always, always keep your guard up."

The servant started walking forward, and yet the words she said to Zuko honestly bothered him as he didn't understand why she would speak such words if he were indeed going to his death. Suddenly, he didn't think his grandfather would actually order him dead, yet the way she spoke of attempted assassinations simply didn't click in his mind. "_Why?_"

Thankfully these words were not said out loud and a sigh escaped Zuko's mouth as he felt more at peace with himself and the current situation, yet his young mind remained confused regarding what was going on. Every so often he peeked ahead, but soon discerned they were heading to Lu Ten's room. For a brief second Zuko thought that might be where his death might take place, and yet this was quickly pushed away.

After all, his grandfather would not want to further upset Uncle Iroh.

Zuko's eyes traveled to the ground while his lips pushed together. In the back of his mind a thought flickered across his mind. "_Of course, I doubt anybody would be upset if I were gone. Azula would be absolutely pleased with…_"

The young prince's mouth opened slightly while his eyes blinked. When he saw Azula earlier she was definitely not pleased, yet she'd certainly been pleased when she came to torment him the night before. The mantra he always told himself came rushing back. "_Azula always lies._"

Yet, in the back of his head he knew there was some kind of truth behind what she said, but that truth always made the lies more powerful. Zuko closed his eyes and tried blocking out the negative thoughts. "We're here."

Zuko's head darted up and looked at the doors to Lu Ten's room. He watched the servant open up the room, almost as if inviting him in. Dust from lack of use rose up as the servant entered, yet Zuko couldn't imagine entering Lu Ten's room without Lu Ten actually being there. A strangled cry lodged in his throat, for Lu Ten would never be there again.

"Prince Zuko?"

Zuko shook his head, but felt the tears start forming in his eyes.

"Esteemed Prince Zuko."

"I…"

"Would you please step in the room?"

"No."

"Prince…"

"It's Lu Ten's room. He isn't here."

"This is Fire Lord Azulon's order." The servant looked him in the eye. When Zuko didn't respond the servant said, "Since it is the order of Fire Lord Azulon it is thus not a breach of etiquette."

"I…" Zuko knew he couldn't argue with the Fire Lord and stepped into the room. His eyes caught sight of the tsungi horn which belonged to Lu Ten along with various other objects, but his mouth formed a thin line as he remembered his cousin playing the instrument while Zuko rested his head in Lu Ten's lap with his eyes closed while lying in the warm sun.

"_I'll teach you to play one day._"

"_Really?_" Zuko remembered saying, only to counter with, "_But father says such things are a waste of time_"

"_You really shouldn't listen to Uncle Ozai. The tsungi horn is actually an effective way of practicing breath control._"

He didn't see the servant step towards the doors so she might close them behind her. "You are to stay here Prince Zuko. There will be guards stationed nearby, but if you need anything these two are right outside the door."

Zuko turned and looked at the woman in horror. "Wait. I don't want…"

"Lord Azulon ordered that you stay in the room until otherwise ordered, but you will take your meals here as well."

The doors clicked shut while Zuko looked on in confusion. He found himself looking around the room. Part of him wanted to crawl into Lu Ten's bed and cry, yet he remembered the lecture he received from Ozai the one time…

There was a night when a very young Zuko found himself wandering the halls of the palace after having awoken from a nightmare, but he somehow found himself just outside of Lu Ten's room looking up at the guards with tears in his eyes. One of the men let Lu Ten know he was outside and Lu Ten beckoned him inside and onto his bed for the night. The lecture came when Lu Ten personally escorted Zuko back to Ozai.

Zuko let out a sigh and collapsed onto the rug in a kneeling position. A few tears fell onto his hands, yet he fought back knowing full well tears were unseemly for someone of his stature as were emotions.

Ozai said so.


	2. Unwanted Ministrations

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Unwanted Ministrations_**

The young prince found himself sitting on his heels with his arms wrapped around his knees while rocking back and forth in an attempt to calm himself. Nothing about the situation made sense but being in Lu Ten's room simply reminded Zuko of how much he missed his uncle and cousin. In the back of his mind, he added missing his mother to that list as her constant oversight was now missing.

"_Mothers are supposed to protect their children. Mother said so, and mother never lies._"

Ursa didn't prevent the servant and two soldiers from taking him away, nor did she look him in the eye. Worse, Zuko felt, despite the claim from the servant that he wasn't trespassing, that he in reality was. Eventually, the door opened again, but this time Zuko heard the giggles of female servants as they came into Lu Ten's room.

"Isn't the young prince adorable?"

Heat spread across Zuko's face and he found himself burying his face into his knees. His mind drifted to his actual experiences with the opposite sex and found himself remembering the embarrassing situation with Mai. Nothing that happened made any sense in his mind, yet he didn't understand why Azula found the situation amusing beyond the fact it did, in fact, torment him.

"Please maintain your dignity in front of the prince please."

"Yes, Lady Akane."

Zuko kept his face buried while his entire body stiffened at the sound of the servants approaching. In the back of his mind, he wondered if having to deal with females was some kind of punishment for the slight his father caused his uncle, for being in close proximity and not knowing what to do left Zuko feeling flustered. He heard a trey of food put down in front of him, but Akane spoke. "Esteemed Prince Zuko, we have brought your breakfast."

Zuko peeked out over his arm at the trey of food Akane presented him. His head tilted up more when he realized Akene was, in fact, the servant he saw earlier. His eyes drifted down to the food which in turn looked enticing, yet he didn't feel like eating/ Akane waited patiently with her lips pushed together. Eventually, she let out a sigh. "If you aren't going to eat right away Prince Zuko then we servants will proceed in getting you changed out of your night ware."

The young prince thought he heard wrong, yet he still felt the tips of his ears burn at Akane's suggestion. His golden eyes widened slightly as Akane stood and moved to his side. The woman knelt down and hand reached for Zuko's clothing making him realize she indeed said what he thought she said. He felt his breath hitch, but his foot kicked out in his attempt to backpedal away from the woman. The sound of the trey turning over echoed through the room.

"Prince Zuko…." Akane remained calm, but kneeling where he was, but the two servant girls let out sounds of dismayed shock.

Zuko's eyes looked at the food and drink spilled on the rug in Lu Ten's room and swallowed. "I'm sorry." His small hands reached for the trey and turned it right side up before turning his attention to the food. "I am so sorry."

His small hands attempted scooping the spilled food onto the plate, but a firm hand stopped his ministrations. Zuko let his eyes travel from the wrist, towards the arms and to the face of Akane. The look of disgust on her face made him cringe. "Prince Zuko."

"I…"

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Clea…"

"Cleaning is the job of us servants."

"But…"

Akane's other hand lightly touched Zuko under the arm, but her movements ushered him into a standing position. She gently led him over to Lu Ten's bed, but reluctantly under her guidance, he sat down on the edge. Without looking at the mess she barked an order. "Clear away that mess and bring the prince something else to eat."

She continued holding onto his hand, but somehow procured a cloth and started wiping off Zuko's hand. Zuko's eyes widened. "Wait. No." He looked Akane in the eye. "They don't have to do that. I'm not hungry. Really, I'm not."

The look on Akane's face was cold, but she quickly bowed her head to Zuko. "As you wish, Esteemed Prince Zuko."

Zuko swallowed. "Why do you call me that?"

"That is who you are."

"No. Esteemed Prince is Lu Ten."

"You need not worry your head about such things right now." Akane the back of Zuko's hand lightly while the two servant girls cleared away the food. "Everything will be explained to you in time when Fire Lord Azulon wishes it so."

Zuko's golden eyes drifted towards the floor. He felt Akane stand up and follow the girls out of the room. He didn't see her turn in the doorway to face him and instead heard her feet shuffle in a manner which told him this was the case.

"I hope you feel up to eating at lunchtime Prince Zuko."

A sigh escaped Zuko's lips when he heard the door click shut. He slid down to the ground from the bed into a sitting position and proceeded to bury his head into his arms. Akane said he need not worry about such things, yet this didn't stop him from doing just that. Eventually, he lifted his head and rested his chin on top of his arms while looking out of Lu Ten's room at the gardens.

"Why am I here?" Nobody was there to answer his question. Zuko wiped a few tears away from his eyes and sucked in his breath. Even worse than the thought of his father killing him was the thought of his father lecturing him for letting his emotions take control. "I might as well be. Disappointment. Always a disappointment."

Eventually, Akane came back with the lunchtime meal. Zuko reluctantly attempted to eat something lest he become an even bigger disappointment, yet his appetite remained lacking. Akane watched him carefully before asking, "May we change your clothes now?"

Zuko's eyes widened in horror, but his mouth opened slowly. His golden eyes opened and closed in confusion, yet he felt heat in his cheeks and ears. "I… uh…"

"Understood."

He wasn't sure what was understood as he himself wasn't understanding why the servant was doing what his mother usually oversaw. Zuko's eyes closed upon remembering the look on his mother's face. The servants left and came back at dinner time, yet there seemed something familiar about Akane which Zuko couldn't place. The next time around Akane didn't ask about changing his clothes and instead said something about getting a good night's rest.

As the door clicked Zuko realized she meant getting some sleep in Lu Ten's bed. The young prince returned to resting his chin against his arms while his mind contemplated what he thought of as sacrilege. Eventually, Zuko nodded off.


	3. A Father's Misery

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_A Father's Misery_**

"_I'd give anything to hold you again, Lu Ten_."

In the back of Iroh's mind, he knew this would include giving up every single victory he'd achieved as a soldier in his father's army as his achievements seemed like nothing in comparison to Lu Ten, yet in the back of his mind, he knew Lu Ten _was_ his greatest achievement. He'd always thought this so, yet now he wondered if all of his other achievements could actually add up to that one.

Losing Lu Ten made Iroh feel old despite everyone feeling he was in the prime of his life, yet this made sense given the fact Lu Ten was his life and his heartbeat. The feeling of his will to live leaving left him feeling unable to face his own father right away knowing full well the pain Fire Lord Azulon would feel seeing him in such a state, but Iroh didn't feel right about pushing the kind of pain he felt onto another.

As such he found himself sneaking into the palace early so that he might retreat to Lu Ten's quarters and seek solace among his son's things. Memories of sneaking in and out in his youth flickered through his mind, yet the feeling of exuberance he felt whenever he rebelled was different from the way he felt now. Sneaking in proved just as easy now as it did back then despite Iroh's current lack of zeal, but he soon arrived outside of the doors to Lu Ten's room.

Iroh's eyes narrowed upon seeing a couple of guards outside of Lu Ten's room, but their hands headed towards their weapons. Iroh lowered the hood covering his head and continued walking forward, but one of the guards spoke. "General Iroh. We thought you were to return tomorrow or the day after."

"I wished for some time alone to myself and Lu Ten." Iroh watched the guard's glance at each other. The second guard opened his mouth almost as if he wanted to protest which in turn made Iroh lift a finger to his mouth. "Please don't let anyone know I am here." The worry on their faces made Iroh quickly add, "I'll make sure neither of you get in trouble with Fire Lord Azulon."

He stepped forward and opened the door to Lu Ten's room. The room remained the way he and Lu Ten left the place when they left for the Siege of Ba Sing Se. A sigh escaped Iroh's lips as he closed the doors behind him and walked over to the bed before dropping onto the bed which still somehow kept Lu Ten's scent. Iroh closed his eyes and breathed deeply.

A sound from the other side of the bed made Iroh's eyes snap open and he instinctively sat up. "Who's there!"

"I…" Iroh's eyes widened upon hearing the voice of his nephew, but his eyes picked out the top knot on top of his nephew's small head. A small hand appeared to pull the child up from the ground and he saw Zuko's wide and wary golden eyes looking him right in the eye. A sigh escaped from Iroh's lungs, but his hand lit up a rather weak fireball in his hand so he might see the child better. He watched the child swallow yet made out the fear in the child's eyes. "It's me."

"Zuko." Iroh pushed his lips together, yet he felt the corners of his mouth creep up slightly at seeing the boy. "What are you doing in here?"

Zuko's golden eyes blinked. His nephew pulled himself up further and rested his chin on the edge of the bed. The look on Zuko's face was the boy's usual smile. "I don't know."

"You don't know?" Iroh shook his head. Despite his grief, he still found the situation amusing.

The child blinked back the sleep which lingered in his eyes before his eyes widened. "U… General I…"

"It's just the two of us Zuko."

"Is Lu Ten…" Zuko closed his eyes and lowered his head. "Is he really…"

Iroh felt his jaw drop. He felt a pang of guilt for being so lost in his grief that he'd not thought of the effect his son's death would have on his nephew. A memory flickered through his head of Lu Ten standing tall with his arms crossed while he listened to Zuko chattered amicably but look up at him with such admiration. Iroh never remembered Ozai ever looking at him like that, yet the memory felt painful.

Taking a deep breath, Iroh let the fire in the palm of his hands travel to the lights in the room but watched Zuko look up at this action in curiosity. Despite his grief, Iroh didn't feel as if his fire was as weak as it was a few seconds ago even though it was still quite weak. With no fire in his hands, he reached out under Zuko's small arms and lifted the child up on the bed. He let his arms wrap around Zuko's small frame and felt the boy's warmth against his own.

A calloused hand touched the back of the boy's head lightly and soon Zuko was sobbing into Iroh's chest. Iroh found himself rocking the boy back and forth remember the times he'd comfort Lu Ten in a similar manner, but eventually, Zuko couldn't cry anymore. His nephew pulled away and watched Zuko attempt to wipe away the tears from his red eyes. "Seriously thought Zuko, why are you in here?"

Iroh watched Zuko's puffy eyes widened in horror but saw the boy's hands clutch the sheets so tightly that his knuckles turned white. "Gran… Fire Lord Azulon."

A sigh escaped Iroh's mouth. "_That's why he answered the first question the way he did. He honestly doesn't know what he is doing in here as father hasn't told him, yet I can't place a finger on father's logic either._" Iroh took a deep breath knowing full well he needed to tread carefully with his nephew as the boy had always been a sensitive child. "So, you really don't know why you're in here?"

He watched Zuko physically turn and pull his knees up to his chest, but the child muttered into his knees. "It doesn't make sense."

"What doesn't make sense?" Iroh reached out to touch Zuko's shoulder in a comforting manner, at it was obvious something was bothering the boy.

"Azula said…"

Iroh felt a twinge of anger knowing full well his niece enjoyed tormenting her older brother. His calloused hands reached out and grabbed Zuko's shoulders and turned the boy which in turn made a sharp gasp escape the child. "Zuko, what did Azula…" He watched his nephew shake his head in panic but felt him start to pull away. "…say."

Zuko shook his head even more fervently and tried pulling away. Instead of letting the boy do so Iroh pulled the boy into his lap and sat the child down while rubbing Zuko's back. Iroh kept making comforting sounds as the small child shook in his arms. Whatever Azula said greatly frightened his nephew.

"Zuko, you're safe. You can tell me anything. What did Azula say?"

"She said…" Zuko's voice strained and his face scrunched up. "She said father was going to kill me?"

Iroh closed his eyes and held the child tighter. What Azula said was definitely cruel. Iroh took a deep breath and let it out over the top of Zuko's head. "Zuko, you know your sister lies. A lot."

Zuko pulled his legs in tighter, but his small head shook indicating he didn't think she was lying. "No. Fire Lord Azulon said father would have to kill me."

"Zuko, I doubt your grandfather would…"

"I'm useless. I can't Firebend properly."

"You…" Iroh's eyes opened up. "I won't let anything happen to you."

"Fire Lord Azulon's orders are absolute. Nobody can get him to change his mind."

"Oh?" Iroh let himself smile for the child's sake but used a calloused finger on Zuko's chin to lift the boy's head up so Zuko would look him in the eye. "What? You don't think The Dragon of the West can't change the mind of one Fire Lord? Do you underestimate me, nephew?"

He watched Zuko's facial features calm, but the look in the boy's eyes was pure admiration. The next thing Iroh knew the child was wrapping his arms around Iroh's waist, but he felt the child's heartbeat calm. Zuko buried his face into Iroh's chest. "I love you, Uncle Iroh. Lu Ten as well."

"I know. Why don't the two of us get some sleep here until morning comes? You can tell this old man…"

"You're not old!"

Iroh watched Zuko pull away and look at him with golden eyes filled with honesty. Zuko honestly thought he wasn't old and Iroh couldn't help but smile. "Still, tell me some of the memories of Lu Ten. It will do me some good."

He lay down on the bed with his nephew near him. "Lu Ten was going to teach me the tsungi horn. Did you know that it is a good way to practice breath control?"

"No, I did not." A memory flickered through Iroh's mind of teaching Lu Ten how to play for that very reason.


	4. Moment of Waking

Firebenders rose with the sun meaning Iroh found himself stirring early in the morning and letting out a deep sigh of content. He felt Zuko stir next to him, yet felt the boy snuggle in closer while his small head utilized Iroh's forearm as a pillow and his small hands twisted into the cloth of Iroh's clothing. For a brief moment, he found himself not having to think about anything but enjoying Zuko's company, yet he ignored the opening of the door of Lu Ten's room and instead focused on the deep sigh of content which escaped Zuko's mouth.

"General Iroh…"

Iroh's eyes snapped open upon hearing the voice of Akane, but his head turned slightly so he could see the servant who was the head of his household looking down at him in a rather displeased manner. He cleared his throat and moved, only to feel Zuko stir even more beside him. Iroh's amber colored eyes looked down at the boy just as his nephew startled awake. In a panic, Zuko started pulling away, but his eyes darted over towards Akane.

"Zuko." Iroh sat up and called for the boy at the very moment Zuko fell over the edge of the bed. Seeing only the top knot put slightly askew because of bedhead made Iroh glance over at Akane. A few of the other household servants were with her, but one carried a bowl of water and another a change of clothes for Zuko. A deep breath escaped from his lungs. "What is going on?"

"Apologies General Iroh, but Zuko needs to change out of his nightwear." Akane's words elicited a slight groan from the side of the bed and Iroh glanced over in time to see Zuko's top knot disappear completely indicating the boy likely flopped onto the ground. "He's worn that particular nightwear more than one night."

"I'll take care of it." Iroh felt a twinge of pity upon guessing what Zuko's problem was.

"General Iroh?"

Iroh glanced over at Akane and saw the look of disappointment. "You've done nothing wrong. My nephew's mother always took care of his morning routine. Also, I wish to pay a visit to my father with Prince Zuko."

"Sir?" The tone of voice Akane used made Iroh turn his head towards the servant who was in charge of his household. "Are you…"

"Yes." Iroh waved his hand at Akane and the two servants with her. "Set the bowl and clothes down." He heard the bowl click down onto the table while one of the servants set Zuko's outfit for the day onto the bed. A feeling of relief rushed over Iroh, yet something told him Akane knew something regarding the situation. His more immediate concern was the child hiding from his site. "Zuko? Zuko, you can come out now."

A sigh escaped from Iroh's lips upon Zuko not appearing. Iroh pushed him towards the edge of the bed over which Zuko disappeared and found himself looking down at his nephew who managed to curl into himself while sitting on the floor. His hands clutched the top of his head. In the back of his mind, Iroh wondered if _this_ was what got Akane worked up, yet brushed the thought from the back of his mind.

"Zuko." Iroh lowered himself over the edge. He found himself unsure of what to do, as he'd never seen Lu Ten in such a state. His calloused fingers reached up to touch Zuko's face only for the child to flinch away. He did see one of Zuko's golden eyes look at him, but the sudden lack of trust was all too evident. "Zuko, what did I do?"

"You said you'd change his mind."

Iroh's eyes widened. "I did. Do you really think The Dragon of the West would go back on his word?"

"You're…" The corners of Zuko's mouth twisted slightly.

"I'm what?" Iroh sighed. "Do you think I'm lying?" Zuko still didn't respond. "Zuko, dear nephew. Please tell me what is bothering you, but use whatever words feel most comfortable to you. When it's the two of us you can be yourself."

"Be myself…" Zuko looked at the ground for a few minutes. His head then shot up. "Don't take me to see Fire Lord Azulon! He wants me dead!"

Iroh frowned, realizing his unintentional slip-up. He pulled his own knees up to his chest. "Huh." After a few minutes, he said, "but how are you going to know for sure what I say is the truth?"

"But what if he doesn't change his mind?"

The general let out a laugh and lunged for Zuko pulling him into his arms. "Then I'll grab my precious nephew and run for the nearest ship breathing my fire breath the entire way and we'll sail away to someplace safe. It will be you and me. We'll go fight dragons together!"

"The dragons are dead, remember." Iroh watched Zuko's mouth twisted into a slight frown. "The dragons are dead, remember."

"Oh yeah. We'll go in search of the Avatar then? How about that?"

The frown deepened slightly. "But father and grandfather and great-grandfather couldn't ever find him."

"Then we will and we'll conquer the world and make it a better place."

Zuko's mouth twisted slightly, but he finally nodded his head. "Okay."

"Now, we must get ready for a visit to the Fire Lord."

The child glanced around the room and back at Iroh. "It's not right?"

"What isn't?"

"Where is our best clothing? We can't see the Fire Lord like this?"

A laugh escaped from Iroh's lips. "Oh, Zuko. He'll be fine with me the way I am, though I do agree ones clothing for the night time is not for seeing the Fire Lord in. The outfit Akane brought shall suffice." He watched Zuko's mouth twist again. "What?"

"Who is Akane?"

"Akane is in charge of my household and the servants. She was very good friends with my late wife, but raised Lu Ten in her stead." Iroh stood up. "Come, let us get you ready for a visit to the Fire Lord."

Zuko stood up and dusted off the clothing he currently wore only for his eyes to widen suddenly. "Wait!"

"What?"

The boy lowered his voice as if he were telling a very important secret. "I'm not supposed to leave until he says so."

"Fire Lord Azulon?" Iroh looked down at the boy and watched him nod his head. "You'll be with me, so you will not get in trouble."

Zuko nodded his head, but the look in his eyes said he wasn't quite sure regarding what his uncle said. A quick pat on his shoulders sent Zuko over to the wash bowl the servants brought in and Iroh proceeded to gently wash the tear stains on the boy's face from the night before away before proceeding to change the boy's clothes in a quick manner. The last step involved putting Zuko's hair into the appropriate top not, yet Iroh remembered doing this for Lu Ten.

"There." Iroh's hand reached down and took his young nephews before stepping towards the doors. He stepped out but felt Zuko hang back while the soldier's watched. The look in their eyes told Iroh they were aware of Azulon's order, yet Iroh smiled down at Zuko who's mouth twisted into a bright smile as he fell into step next to his uncle. Iroh physically felt Zuko lean in, meaning the child's fear wasn't entirely dispersed.


	5. Home Coming

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Home Coming_**

"You don't want to see esteemed Prince Zuko?"

Azulon found a good night sleep did nothing to quell the anger he felt towards his youngest son, yet his anger didn't prevent him from getting his proper rest. Other emotions stewed in his head such as grief from losing Lu Ten mixed with both joy and sadness at the thought of seeing his eldest son again in a few days. "No. I am still furious with Ozai for his insolence. Prince Zuko is an innocent in all of this and does not need to feel my wrath."

"And what shall we tell esteemed Prince Zuko?"

"Nothing. The boy deserves to hear what is going on from myself or Iroh, but I wish to explain things to General Iroh before, yet having my eldest there at the time will help. Make sure my grandson is taken care of until then, but report back to me regarding how Prince Zuko is fairing.

The servant in charge of Iroh's household did in fact report back the fact Zuko didn't earth breakfast and picked at his later meals which proved as disheartening as the fact Zuko didn't let the servants perform their duties regarding the young prince's daily wardrobe. "_Iroh will return soon and that will be set right._"

What he did not expect was Iroh arriving home in secretor his eldest son bringing his youngest grandson with him. Azulon took note of how Iroh's mouth twisted into a deep frown, but Iroh's eyes betrayed the anger the crown prince felt towards his own father before his manner of speech did. "Fire Lord Azulon."

Azulon brushed off the curt greeting and instead focused on his small grandson who stood next to Iroh. The child's delicate fingers rested gently in the hand of The Dragon of the West's own hand while Zuko's eyes remained wide. Tears welled in the corner's of Zukos eyes; worse, Azulon recognized the look of fear."

"Zuko." Azulon folded one hand over the other in his lap. "Come here."

He watched Zuko's attempt of compliance stop when Iroh's hand tightened slightly around the child's. The young prince's head turned so he might look up with his golden eyes into those of Iroh. Azulon watched his oldest shake his head at Zuko before continuing to glare at his father.

"Iroh, your brother has already tried my patience. Don't…"

Azulon stopped speaking when Zuko's head jerked so the child now looked the Fire Lord in the eye. The child's mouth opened slightly, yet his golden eyes which matched those of the previous Fire Lord Widened. Azulon watched Zuko quickly jerk his hand out of Iroh's grip before stepping forward. Zuko's small hands tucked behind his back as he stepped briskly towards his grandfather. Despite tears still welling in the corners of his eyes the boy bowed and made the proper hand jester when he arrived in front of the Fire Lord. The fear in the boy's eyes became replaced by a look of determination.

The corner of Azulon's mouth twitched slightly. "Zuko, are you afraid of me?"

The Fire Lord watched a look of surprise appear on his grandson's face. Zuko's mouth opened, yet no words came out. The child's golden eyes move in a manner which indicated he was thinking of an answer.

"Let's fix that." Azulon reached out for his young grandson and gently lifted the boy into his lap. The action surprised Zuko making the boy let out a slight gasp. Azulon settled the boy on his knee before placing one of his arms behind the child. The Fire Lord's eyes drifted over towards Iroh and saw a look of fear on his son's face which reminded him of when the crown prince was younger and expecting a lecture for getting into some kind of trouble. While he found himself perturbed by the strange turn of events, Azulon's focus remained on his grandchild. "Tell me child. Why are you afraid of me?"

"I…"

"Be truthful now."

"Isn't everyone supposed to be afraid of the Fire Lord." Zuko's mouth twisted into a slight pout while he avoided making eye contact with her grandfather.

"Tell me Zuko, do you want your people to be afraid of you when you become Fire Lord?"

Zuko's eyes widened in confusion. "How can I become Fire Lord when father is supposed to sacrifice me?"

Azulon felt anger well in his throat and chest, but his voice became slightly stern. "Prince Zuko, what did Ozai tell you?"

The child shook his head. "It wasn't father. Azula stayed after you yelled at him, then told me."

"You stayed after I bid you leave?" Azulon watched Zuko's eyes widen in horror, but a quick look over at Iroh saw a softening of facial features. Iroh seemed confused, yet something told Azulon his eldest was starting to put the pieces together. Azulon gently squeezed the young prince's arm with his free hand. "You are not the first child to hide in the Fire Lord's throne room observing conversations he shouldn't, but if the Fire Lord punished children for that, a certain crown prince wouldn't be alive a dozen times over."

"Uncle Iroh?" Zuko's head turned and looked at the crown prince in awe.

"Of course, I don't recommend young princes hiding behind the curtains of the throne room. I doubt watching an angry Fire Lord was a pleasant experience your you, was it?" Azulon watched Zuko shake his head. The Fire Lord found himself smiling at the boy. "Eventually Iroh will be Fire Lord, then you, but by the time you become Fire Lord the war we are fighting will be over. When that time comes the Fire Nation will need a different kind of Fire Lord."

"I don't understand." Zuko's face twisted in confusion. "How can I be Fire Lord if I'm dead?"

Azulon felt the smile leave his face. "Azula is a nasty child like her father."

"Father." Iroh cleared his throat. "Perhaps Zuko would like to see the Pai Sho board you use for entertaining?" The Fire Lord watched the look of fear appear again on his grandson's face. "Don't worry Zuko. I promised no harm would come to you, remember?"

"Go. The Dragon of the West always keeps his word." Azulon watched the relief wash over Zuko's face, but he turned towards the servant standing by the door waiting for an instruction. "Please show the table to my grandson so I may speak to my son."

Iroh deflated emotionally when Zuko followed the servant out of the room. He turned and looked Azulon in the eye. "What did my brother do to anger you this time?"

"Plenty." Azulon's eyes narrowed while the anger he felt towards his youngest boiled to the surface. He nodded his head over towards the tea set indicating he wanted Iroh to make tea. "Ozai wanted me to revoke your birthright because your bloodline has ended."

Iroh stopped in front of the tea and turned to look his father in the eye. "Did you really tell Ozai he would need to sacrifice his own child?"

"Yes, I did say he should sacrifice his first born so he would know the pain of losing his first-born child as you did." Azulan's fingers tightened around the armrest of his chair while watching Iroh pick up the trey containing the tea set. "Of course, if I wanted him to simply know the pain of losing a child to death, I would have asked him to sacrifice Azula. He had the gall to parade her around in front of me while…"

"Ozai is quite proud of Azula, but I've heard her teachers say she's a prodigy."

"Prodigy…" Azulon tapped his fingers on the armrest while Iroh sat the trey down. "While she is a prodigy in certain things – memorizing and replicating moves, the power behind her bending – comparing her to myself is an absolute joke. Learning Firebending in the new manner is child's play in comparison to the way of old."

Iroh set the pestle down while placing his hands into his lap. "You know Ozai only learned the new manner of bending, but the old way is practically lost. You can't fault him for his assumption he made, for there is no way he could know."

Azulon let his fingers tighten around the armrest. He felt his words vibrate in his throat while is ire grew. "What I fault him for isn't the comparison, but the disrespect he openly showed his first born. He knew full well she would answer the question he posed to Zuko, yet instead of reprimanding her he instead proceeds in showcasing her Firebending skills."

His eldest looked down at the herbs in the mortar while his hands tightened and Iroh's mouth formed a deep frown. "How does showcasing her ability disrespect Zuko beyond the fact he let her interrupt?"

"Because he had no intent of letting Zuko showcase his bending ability, yet that child felt so slighted by his actions that Zuko decided on showing what he's learned so far on his own." Azulon watched Iroh look up in excitement. The Fire Lord held up one hand cautioning his eldest son. "The display was a complete disaster!" The anger surged forward. "A four-year-old's flame is bigger than Zuko's, but Firebenders _half_ his age are able to successfully perform the most basic stance yet also land on their feet!"

"Zuko's struggling?" The look of pain in Iroh's face left a bitter taste in the back of Azulon's mouth, yet the reaction was the one he wanted from his eldest son.

"That's not the worst part! He wanted to hide from me the fact Zuko is struggling! He didn't hide this to protect Zuko." Azulon waved his hand while Iroh glanced down at the unfinished tea. "No, he did this to protect himself, yet it was all to obvious Zuko's move was _not_ in his plan! The only comfort that night was Zuko's resolve in getting up and trying again even though he failed, but Princess Ursa – unlike _him_ – placed merit in this trait!"

"Yet in punishing Ozai you punish her as well."

Azulon waved his hand. "I'll think of some way to reward her in all of this, but do not think the Fire Lord a fool for giving the child one son scorns to the son who would cherish said child unconditionally as if he were his own!"

"You…"

The hurt ton in Iroh's face made Azulon's facial features soften. "The two of you need each other. Zuko needs someone to care for him, but you need someone to care for so your grief doesn't destroy you, something you know Lu Ten would not want. More importantly…" Azulon took a deep breath. "I don't think the new manner of learning Firebending suits Zuko, yet there aren't many masters who know the old way. I don't know if the damage Ozai's done can be undone, yet you know you're the only one of those master's I would trust with such an important task."

Iroh's eyes darted towards the ground. "What you're doing… do you understand how confusing such a thing is for a child his age?" Azulon watched Iroh's head dart up. "To Zuko, I am his beloved uncle he dotes upon, yet you're asking me to replace his beloved father. He's a sensitive child father, so pushing all of this on him…"

"I don't expect perfection from him. He's already received to much."

"That's not what I mean." Iroh let out a deep breath. "I know he and I have no say on the fact you're having us become…" Azulon watched his son swallow. "Despite that Zuko should have some sort of say on what is going on in his life, or do you want him to see you in the same way he sees Ozai?"

Azulon's eyes narrowed. "So be it. We will discuss the matter with Zuko."


	6. Upside Down World

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Upside Down World_**

Zuko's stomach churned with each step he took towards the private quarters of the Fire Lord. Holding onto his Uncle calloused head did nothing to abate the fear pounding in his small heart. In the back of his mind, a voice screamed the place was forbidden, yet he feared the lecture he would receive from Ozai. His golden eyes darted around fearfully taking everything he'd never seen before.

He didn't know what would happen when they stepped into the private sitting room of the Fire Lord. The realization hit upon seeing the Fire Lord's face he'd rarely seen the formidable man in front of him without a wall of fire between them, yet the voice in the back of his head which sounded so much like Ozai kept saying the Fire Lord ordered his death.

"Zuko, come here." Hearing the Fire Lord speak made Zuko's heart beat even more erratically and he almost obediently stepped forward doing what was expected. A small squeeze on his hand made Zuko stop and look up at his protector. The way Iroh shook his head reminded Zuko of the promise of protection he'd received from none other than The Dragon of the West. "Iroh, your brother has already tried my patience. Don't…"

"_What will the Fire Lord do to uncle if I don't comply?_" Zuko found himself stepping towards the Fire Lord bound and determined to protect the person who promised to protect him no matter what the consequences would be. He didn't expect the Fire Lord lifting him up so he might sit on the man's knee while gently holding him there, nor did he expect to find Azulon's embrace warm and comforting. The warm feeling didn't make the fear go away, yet Zuko found himself left even more confused. "_How can I be Fire Lord if I'm dead?_"

The thought which he openly verbalized continued churning in the back of Zuko's mind while he followed the servant to the room where his grandfather's Pai Sho table was kept. The servant stood by the door while Zuko walked over to the table and walked around the circle letting his finger drag around the edge. His mouth formed a thin line wondering what importance his grandfather and uncle found in Pai Sho when the game was yet another thing Ozai said was a waste of time.

"Do you know how to play, esteemed Prince Zuko?"

Zuko stopped walking around the table. Quite a few servants referred to him as the esteemed Prince Zuko. He swallowed, remembering how the servants used the words esteemed with his cousin Lu Ten, yet brushed it aside despite knowing what the use of the word along with his grandfather's question regarding what kind of Fire Lord he wanted to be actually meant. In the back of his head, he still heard Azula telling him their father was going to kill him. "No."

"Would you like me to teach you?"

The young prince shook his head and instead sat down on one of the cushions. His small hand reached for the box of tiles sitting nearby and placed the tile onto the table allowing him to examine the design on the tile which in turn distracted him from his current situation. A few more titles joined the other tile on the board when he heard someone clearing their throat. Zuko's head darted up. "Uncle!"

Relief washed over the young prince as Zuko pushed himself up from the table. He walked over and wrapped his small arms around his uncle's waist while burring his head into the man's warm stomach. He felt his uncle's calloused hands lightly touch his back and the top of his head. Eventually, Iroh pulled away and knelt down while his hands when up to cusp Zuko's small face. A smile spread across his face. "Looks like we worried for nothing, dear child as it turns out your grandfather didn't order your death."

Zuko's eyes blinked. "I don't understand. What's going on?"

"You'll get your answers when you and I join your grandfather for lunch. In the meantime, what would you like to do? I could give you your first lesson on the tsunagi horn, but you've not yet had breakfast."

His eyes darted away. "Um…" His stomach still churned. "I don't feel like eating."

Iroh let out a laugh before standing and lifting Zuko into his arms. The breath rushed out of Zuko's lungs while his eyes looked down at the ground. In the back of his mind, he couldn't remember a time Ozai held him in this manner, yet he did remember his mother holding him in her arms. "That's not surprising given the excitement of this morning. So, where are we off to?"

Zuko's fingers twisted into Iroh's clothing while his eyes closed. The events of the last few days completely interrupted his usual schedule, but his throat tightened. His voice lowered to a whisper. "I've not practiced my Firebending today yet, but father will be mad enough that I didn't yesterday either."

He felt Iroh tense up. A sigh from his uncle made Zuko's eyes snap open, but they closed when his uncle touched his forehead to Zuko's. "I'd love to see you Firebend."

Zuko's eyes snapped open, but his hand which gripped into his uncle's clothing tugged indicating he wanted down. Iroh let him slip from his arms and Zuko looked at his feet. "I'm not any good."

Iroh let out a laugh. "Zuko, what I care about is that you try and never give up?"

"Mother said that!" A smile spread across his face, but his hand reached out for his uncle's hand. The young prince pulled his uncle after him. Iroh let out a laugh but eventually stopped. Zuko turned and looked up at the man. "What?"

"Zuko, we're not going to that practice ground." Iroh smiled down at him, yet the look on his face was pained. Zuko swallowed, realizing he'd started towards the practice grounds of Ozai's household. The young prince found himself looking in the direction of the part of the palace where his father, mother, and sister would be sometime during the day. A sigh escaped his lips, but Iroh placed a gentle hand on his back and redirected him towards another part of the palace. "Let's go this way."

Zuko followed Iroh towards the practice grounds of his uncle's practice ground. Iroh nudged him into the center of the grounds when the arrived but patted him on the shoulder.

"Start."

The young prince found himself moving, but his movements felt awkward and unfamiliar. He struggled and failed his jumps. Zuko expected a lecture or disdain, but when he turned and looked where his uncle was sitting, he received a genuine smile. The man even clapped his hands before standing up and walking over.

Zuko frowned. "I messed up. I can't get any of this right."

"Start over with the opening stance." Iroh insisted and Zuko frowned and went into his warmup stance. He started into the first movement but heard his uncle speak. "No. Hold still." Zuko felt his uncle's hands gently adjust his positioning. "How does it feel now?"

Good. It felt good."

Iroh let out a laugh and placed his forehead against Zuko's. "I'm glad."

Zuko frowned. "But I messed up."

"Didn't you say you couldn't get any of it right? You just got part of it right." Iroh continued resting his forehead but rested his hands gently on Zuko's shoulders.

"But…" Zuko couldn't help but look at his feet remembering Azula saying he would never catch up.

"You did wonderful Zuko, but a person learns more from messing up than they do always getting things right."

_Note – I actually finished chapter five last night, yet I felt I needed to get this one done before posting. I've also posted the original version of chapter five before I decided to toss it as it's own separate story._


	7. The Meaning of Sacrifice

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_The Meaning of Sacrifice_**

"What does the word sacrifice mean to you Zuko?"

Iroh watched Zuko's head dart up from where he sat at the Fire Lord's dining room table. The boy's mouth twisted slightly, yet he saw in his nephews' golden eyes an inkling of the fear which haunted the boy since he returned. In the back of his mind, he felt unsure the question his father asked was, in fact, the right direction to start the conversation discussing what kind of say Zuko would have regarding the sudden change in his life.

"The word sacrifice means the person doing the sacrifice is expected to give something up."

Careful observation of his nephew revealed things Iroh wished he might deny. The thought his own brother neglected his own flesh and blood made his stomach churn painfully. He forced a smile onto his face while watching his nephew Firebend. The last thing he wished was for Zuko to think he was lying about taking delight in the boy's display of Firebending. He did indeed feel delighted watching his nephew bend with such earnest and determination, yet he knew Zuko was far behind his peers.

"What if I were to ask you to sacrifice your favorite toy?"

Iroh watched his nephew closely and saw the look of confusion yet remembered the look of confusion on Zuko's face when he complimented the boy. Even when Zuko did something right he struggled with believing the truth revealing just how starved for any form of compliment the boy was, yet he found his mouth twisting wondering if bringing up something as important to a child as a toy was the right idea given the situation. He didn't, however, expect what Zuko actually said.

"What do you mean you don't have any toys? Do you not still have the stuffed Tiger Monkey I gave you?"

Zuko's lip quivered slightly, but he slid down slightly while his eyes looked down at the table. He quickly glanced up at Iroh who looked at him with wide eyes. Iroh's mouth opened slightly, yet he found himself unable to say anything. He instead remembered the delight Azulon took in picking out the toy for Zuko's first birthday, but the pride his father showed. The crown prince glanced over at the Fire Lord and saw a look which indicated the man didn't like his gift being forgotten.

"Father said I was too old." The strain in Zuko's voice made Iroh turn his head, yet it crossed his mind there were a lot of things Ozai told Zuko which were inappropriate. His thoughts turned towards Lu Ten, who eventually did outgrow his own toys, yet Iroh never required his son to give up the toys. Instead, they remained tucked in a chest in hopes Lu Ten's future child might play with the toys, but they were treated as cherished possessions.

"Let me guess." The tone of voice used by Azulon was sharp and Zuko shrunk back slightly before his eyes darted around taking in the place. The young prince looked around the room ever since Iroh first brought him in, yet their meals had yet to be served and they were simply making small talk, so to speak, though the conversation, in reality, wasn't simply small talk. "He gave the toy to Azula?"

"No." Zuko looked down at the table while his lips pushed together. "Azula burned it."

Iroh glanced from his nephew to his father and saw the look of disappointment on his father's face. The Fire Lord took a deep breath before continuing while Zuko's eyes remained on the table. "Is there anything of importance to you?"

Zuko's head darted up, but a smile appeared on his face. "The knife uncle gave me."

The crown prince felt a smile spread across his face, yet in the back of his mind, he wondered how Zuko would react to wherever the Fire Lord was going with the conversation. "What if I were to ask you to sacrifice that knife?"

The smile fell from Zuko's face as Iroh expected, but the boy swallowed. The small hands which once rested on the top of the table now shifted to his lap. "You would expect me to give you that knife."

Iroh let out a deep sigh, not liking the fact his father actually asked Zuko about giving up something important to him. He found himself thankful when the servants brought in the food, but noticed his father requested roast duck as one of the main courses. He glanced up and saw Zuko's eyes go wide and the boy swallow. His hands remained in his lap and his golden eyes returned to looking at his hands. "No. What use is a broken knife to you?"

"If a broken knife is no use to me dear child, then what use is a broken grandson?"

"Isn't that why…" Zuko looked up and looked the Fire Lord in the eye. "Am I not broken?"

Iroh appreciated the fact his father didn't go in a direction he thought he would but finally decided to speak. "No, Zuko, you are not broken, but even if there were such a day that would occur that doesn't mean you're useless or unimportant. You are very, very important. Do you understand?"

The crown prince turned his head towards his father and watched his father instruct one of the servants regarding what should be placed onto Zuko's plate. "No, I don't."

"Iroh is now your father." Azulon stopped instructing the servant and turned to look at Zuko. "You are now the sole child of the crown prince and his heir."

Iroh let out a deep breath wishing his father hadn't been so forthright regarding the matter. The way Zuko now trembled worried him, but the color drained from Zuko's face. "No."

"Excuse me?" Azulon's tone of voice indicated he obviously did not like being defied.

"I won't replace Lu Ten!" The torches in the dining room flared slightly while Zuko's eyes closed. "That's not fair to him, but I won't let you erase him! I won't let you make me forget him!"

The crown prince quickly glanced over at the Fire Lord whose face twisted slightly. "Why would you _think_ I was replacing him?"

"Because you placed me in his room! You said I was to be uncle's sole child!" A few tears trickled from Zuko's closed eyes. "I loved Lu Ten! Don't make me do it!"

"Zuko!" Iroh decided to take charge of the situation. "Your grandfather meant you will be my sole living child, but Lu Ten's room…" He paused. "We will not ignore your feelings regarding that, but I promise you that you're not replacing Lu Ten. No, you're now the younger brother Lu Ten always wanted."

"Not fair." Zuko opened his eyes. "Why? Why after he died?"

"Here." Azulon's voice made Iroh turn his head. The Fire Lord patted the floor next to him. "Sit by me Zuko." He turned and looked at one of the servants. "If you will move a pillow next to me so my grandson might sit next to me."

The servant bowed and brought one of the pillows over and placed it beside Azulon. Zuko moved over and sat next to Azulon, but the look on his eyes betrayed how unsure the child was of the situation. The child's golden eyes widened when Azulon pulled him into a one-armed hug while his free hand reached for a napkin and gently wiped away the tears from Zuko's face. Iroh felt a smile spread across his face.

"There, there. I forgot you are a sensitive child and that I must be careful with how I word things with you." Azulon glanced over at Iroh. "I did this despite having been forewarned by your father."

Zuko's head hung. "So, I'm not allowed to call him uncle?"

"Iroh is your father now."

"But he's also my uncle. How's that fair to him? How am I to forget that?"

"Has Iroh been a good uncle to you?" Azulon asked. Zuko nodded his head in response, yet said anything. The man reached out and gently lifted Zuko's chin so that the boy might look him in the eye. "By law, he is your father. It won't be announced right away which will give you time to adjust to the change. However, I will not ignore that by blood Iroh is your uncle. As such I give you permission when it is just the two of you, nay, even if it is just you and I to call him uncle. Be mindful though Zuko as you get older you may not feel the same way."

Zuko nodded his head. Iroh took a deep breath. "Regarding Lu Ten's room."

"Lu Ten's room which belongs to the heir of the crown prince."

"Would it hurt father to allow Lu Ten's room to remain the same, but for Zuko to have a second room? It will make the transition for Zuko much easier, yet if Zuko were actually Lu Ten's younger brother by blood would you actually ask him to take over Lu Ten's room completely?"

"No. You are correct. I would not ask that of your second born, so I will not ask that of you Zuko. In my rashness, I did not think of that, so I hope you will forgive the Fire Lord for his discretion?" The response Azulon received was a pair of golden eyes looking up at him in confusion. Azulon let out a laugh. "I know that you've been taught the Fire Lord never makes mistake, but there are times we have. Do you forgive me?"

Iroh felt his heart warm upon seeing the smile spread across Zuko's face, but his small hands reach out so he might hug Azulon. The boy buried his face into the robes and let out a sigh. "I believe he has."

He'd not seen his father smile like that often, but one of Azulon's hands touched the back of Zuko's head lightly. Eventually, Zuko pulled away and tried taking on a more serious position as expected of someone of the Royal family. "Do you have any questions?"

"Why me?" Zuko looked at the plate Azulon pushed towards him, his eyes widening at the amount of food on the plate. "Why not Azula?"

"You underestimate yourself."

"Fa…" The child's mouth twisted slightly. "Prince Ozai…"

Azulon lifted a finger to Zuko's lips hushing the boy. Eventually, he removed his finger. "I'm fully aware of the fact you are struggling with your Firebending."

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry?"

"For not living up to the expectations of the Royal Family."

"The reason you don't live up to those expectations is no fault of yours. That blame lies completely with Ozai and the way he's neglected making sure you have the proper training." Azulon pushed Zuko's plate slightly in hopes his grandson might start eating. "From now on you will have the proper training, though I won't give you any false promises regarding improvement, for I do not know if the damage can be undone."

"I…"

"I know you'll try." Azulon motioned towards the food. "Right now, I wish for you to eat and be healthy. Do you understand?"

Zuko nodded his hand and started eating. In turn, Azulon and Iroh also dug in. Like Iroh, his father watched Zuko's eating habits, but Iroh watched Azulong give him a look of concern at Zuko's lack of appetite. Iroh mouthed the word later indicating now wasn't the best time to discuss such things. He watched his father finally relax, but smile down at the child now glued to his side.


	8. Lu Ten's Things

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Lu Ten's Things_**

Zuko felt tired.

He found the day overwhelming yet so surreal. Everything felt like a contradiction of what Ozai or Azula told him, yet despite knowing his sister always lied he found himself struggling with believing everything he experienced was actually real. Despite this one thing he knew of in the moment was that he didn't in that moment need to feel afraid of Fire Lord Azulon.

Of course, both his uncle and grandfather seemed worried about something as he continued eating. The meal proved relaxing, far more relaxing than he remembered meals ever being. Azula always liked making meals miserable with whispers and demands for the last piece of food. The table in front of him was filled with plenty, but he found himself enjoying the meal even though his grandfather would speak up and beckon him to eat something more. He finally needed to say, "I'm full."

"Alright. When Iroh is finished you and your father may go and spend some time bonding with each other."

Zuko's mouth moved slightly upon hearing these words. The idea Ozai was no longer his father was setting in, yet in the back of his mind, he didn't understand how such a thing might be possible given the fact families work a very specific way. Something told him the question of how and why might be a question too complicated for someone his age and thus not something adults would want to take the time to explain. In other words, the question was one of those questions which always resulted in Ozai giving him a dirty look.

Iroh quickly finished and Zuko stood up excepting he would take his uncle's hand. Instead, the man lifted him up into his arms. The motion allowed Zuko the chance of wrapping his arms around the man's neck, yet he felt safe in the strong arms while Iroh bid his father leave. Zuko realized after a few minutes he'd not done the same in kind, something Ozai would likely have chewed him out for, yet neither his uncle or grandfather did such a thing.

The young boy buried his face into the crook of Iroh's neck and took in his uncle's familiar scent. The familiar smells, in turn, helped him relax and his eyes close, but Iroh started humming gently in Zuko's ear; the child recognized the song as one of Iroh's war songs, yet he found even more comfort in the familiarity. Eventually, they arrived at the door and Iroh reached to open said door.

They slid into the room and Zuko felt himself set down onto the edge of a bed. He opened his eyes and looked around the room – Lu Ten's room. A sigh left Zuko's lungs, but Iroh distracted him from his thoughts by sitting down beside him. "So…"

"So?" Zuko mimed. His eyes drifted towards his feet.

"The tsungi horn is yours now."

A pair of gold eyes blinked back the tired feeling. Eventually, Zuko looked towards Iroh. "I'm not replacing Lu Ten. You promised."

"No, but he'd want you to have it. Chances are he'd have given you the horn, or let you use it. It will just sit there otherwise, and I'd doubt he'd want that. Plus, it is essential to your future Firebending training dear one, but I intend to keep Lu Ten's promise to you regarding teaching you."

"I guess."

"Do you know what the horn sounds like?"

Zuko frowned, but then nodded his head. "Lu Ten played it for me."

"Would you like me to play it for you? It doesn't seem your quite ready for a lesson."

The child's eyes blinked before looking at his uncle. "What do you mean? I'm ready?"

"Zuko, you look exhausted. I can't blame you for being so, given what's happened today and yesterday."

"I'm not weak."

"Admitting that one needs help or that one is at their limit is not a weakness, but instead a strength."

"F…" Zuko's eyes closed. "He says otherwise."

"You mean Ozai."

"Yes."

Iroh took a deep breath before letting it out. "That figures. He seems bent on pounding into you the traits he doesn't like and making you the person he wants you to be rather than the person you are."

"The person I am is not adequate."

"The person you are is quite adequate." A laugh escaped Iroh's lungs. "Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, but…" The man paused making Zuko glance up at his uncle. The man looked at the tsungi horn. "Let me play for you? The tsungi horn holds good memories for both of us regarding Lu Ten, does it not?"

"Yes." Zuko watched his uncle stand up and head over towards the horn. The man picked up the instrument and soon sat down next to Zuko. Soon, the melody filled the room and Zuko struggled in keeping his eyes open. The music stopped and Zuko tried opening his eyes to protest the fact Iroh stopped. Instead, he felt Iroh lean him gently back.

"Shush. Let me get you out of the least comfortable of the royal clothes."

"Need to change," Zuko muttered.

"Did I wear my night clothing the night before, Zuko?"

Zuko shook his head and buried his face into the pillow. "No."

"Then it is okay. Tomorrow I will work with you on learning to dress yourself so you don't have to worry about the servants fussing over you, or in the very least as much."

"Okay." Zuko turned onto his back. Despite saying he was okay, he really wasn't. His golden eyes opened up and he looked at his uncle. The man look on the man's face was one of surprise and worry. "I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"Worrying you. Upsetting your life."

"You've not upset my life. No, I think…" Iroh took a deep breath. "Never mind. That's not something for you to worry yourself over."

"What isn't?"

"The conjectures of old men."

"Uncle isn't old."

Iroh let out a laugh. He glanced towards another part of the room and stood up. "Let's see if we can't find something to make sleeping easier for you."

Zuko watched his uncle walk over to a trunk in the corner of the room. "Uncle. Please don't give me any more of Lu Ten's things."

The man paused. "Zuko. Lu Ten and I saved these things for when he had children of his own. They were his own childhood things after all. That future isn't a future which will happen now. These were things which were meant to be cherished by a child again." Iroh lifted out a particular item and hid it behind his back. A goofy smile appeared on his face while he headed over. "That said…"

"What?" Zuko's eyes widened while he wondered why his uncle stopped speaking.

"I think if you have Lu Ten's favorite childhood toy then it will be like he is here watching over you while you sleep, don't you think?"

Zuko reached his hands out without thinking and took the stuffed dragon from his uncle. He pulled the item towards his chest and closed his eyes. A few tears welled at the corners of his eyes, yet no words came out of his mouth. The idea of Lu Ten watching over him from the spirit world was an honestly enticing thought, yet holding something so precious to his cousin also proved comforting.

"There you go. I'll continue playing until you fall asleep."


	9. Laying Plans

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Laying Plans_**

"I'd like to make a request of you."

Azulon looked down at the man who made toys for noble families in the Fire Nation from behind his veil of fire, but the man kept his head low so he didn't look the Fire Lord in the eye despite the veil. "Are you commissioning a toy because Lady Ursa is with child again? If so, I wish to congratulate the royal family and voice my appreciation and being honored yet again by the Fire Lord with such a task. I promise to keep word of this a secret."

The Fire Lord found amusement in the man's enthusiasm. "Actually, this request is a bit different than the previous ones. While I'm aware of the fact your toys are one of a kind, I wish for you to replicate the toy I choose for Prince Zuko."

"Sir?"

"I learned recently that his younger sister was a bit overzealous and destroyed the cherished toy, but Prince Zuko is struggling with the death of Prince Lu Ten." Of course, overzealous was an understatement regarding the destruction of the toy, yet saving face was important. The understating of Zuko's personal struggles were in part to save face, yet also because he'd not publicly announced Iroh taking Zuko as his son.

"Is the Fire Lord requesting I replicate the toy."

"To the best of your ability. I'm not expecting an exact replication, but something which at least looks similar and feels the same purpose. The sooner you can finish, the better."

"Understood. I'll also use the same discretion as I normally would, Fire Lord Azulon. May I be dismissed so I may start my work."

"Go." Azulon found himself pleased with the man and watched him leave. His eyes narrowed when Ozai entered, yet knew full well he'd summoned his wayward son.

"You wished to speak with me, father."

"I've not yet forgiven you, so I suggest calling me Fire Lord for now." Azulon found amusement in the manner Ozai deflated.

"If you'd not…" Ozai cleared his throat realizing he'd need to speak more carefully. "What reason did you summon me, Fire Lord Azulon?"

"I would like a complete record of what the esteemed Prince Zuko's learned so far from his tutors sent to Crown Prince Iroh, General Iroh by the end of tomorrow so he can assess where to proceed in his son's education from here on out. There is no need to send information regarding his Firebending beyond the list of teachers he's been under as both myself and his father have assessed the direction needed regarding his bending. I'd hate to think you were lax regarding his other studies, but I'd better not see fudged records simply for you to save face."

"Is that all."

"I shall be angry if news of you giving your son up leaks before officially announced, but I'd suggest informing that daughter of hers to keep her mouth shut regarding the matter as I will assume it was either you or her who leaked the information and will find some kind of punishment for you both regardless of whether either of you leaked the information. For now, you are dismissed."

"Yes, Fire Lord Azulon." Ozai bowed before leaving.

Azulon took a deep breath and stood up from the throne. He headed straight for the royal spa knowing Iroh would head there after finishing with Zuko for the day. The hot water of the baths would help relieve the stress brought on by the war, the death of his son and the role of becoming a father again. He didn't expect Iroh there until later in the day. "You aren't eating dinner with Zuko?"

Iroh glanced over at his father. "Zuko's already asleep as he was rather worn out. I gave instruction to leave something he can eat with ease should he wake up. Did you wish to speak with me about something?"

"I made a request for you to be sent Zuko's records regarding his instruction to this point, though I expect similar disappointment regarding his non-bending learning."

"That will come in handy." Iroh let out a sigh. "Even with such information, this is going to be difficult for him."

"If you don't mind, I'd like to arrange an appointment for Zuko to see one of the royal physicians."

His son startled. "Why?"

"Did you not notice how Zuko picked at his food during lunch?"

"Yes, that is worrisome. It might just be he's stressed from everything which has gone on."

"I don't wish to take such chances, yet if the physician has an idea of how we can help him progress I wish to utilize this to our advantage."

"On top of this, you don't trust this to be another area that Ozai neglected? I'm sure Princess Ursa saw to this matter." Iroh looked Azulon in the eye.

"I am still trying to think of a way to make it so she's not punished like he is."

"Allow her the freedom to visit Zuko when she chooses, though I imagine you'll give her specific instruction regarding what she can or can't say to Zuko. Actually…" Iroh took a deep breath. "Even though she is not married, let her have the status my wife would have if she were still alive and recognize her importance to Zuko's grown as a person. Would this be out of place given the fact she is the only adult female within the palace grounds?"

"That sounds reasonable. No, that is more than reasonable. There is one more thing."

"Yes?"

"Do you know who the friends of Zuko are? I wish that they maintain their friendship."

"I don't recollect, but I wouldn't be surprised if this was another thing Ozai neglected. After all, it is rather odd I am not aware of any of Zuko's companions outside of…" Iroh paused, almost as if contemplating the right words.

"Outside of what?"

"My eldest child. I am not aware of any companions outside of Lu Ten, yet strange enough I have met Azula's. I didn't think much about this given the fact I was far more curious how Azula managed to maintain any friends given her… personality."

Azulon let out a sound of disgust. "He likely played up the fact they would be friends with what _he_ considers a child genius, but also what their families can gain from this. Actually, I'd like to know who these girls are because I wouldn't be surprised if he – despite his obvious neglect – saw fit to arrange a marriage between Zuko and one of those girls for power purposes."

"If there is, what will we do about it?"

"Any agreement he's made regarding Zuko is null and void as he is no longer the boy's father even if Ursa entered into the agreement with him. Actually, I am interested to see what kind of move that family will make once the announcement regarding Zuko is made. It will be important to shelter Zuko from said business, though."

"I'll ask Lady Akane to keep an ear out, but she may have some grandsons around Zuko's age. Her friendship with my wife continued with our sons, but I'd be delighted if said friendship continued onto another generation. She may also know some other young nobles around his age which would make for good companions."

"I trust her as well. It's why I placed Zuko into her care."


	10. Slow Adjustment

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Slow Adjustment_**

Zuko's eyes fluttered open while his ears picked up on the silence which surrounded him. The scilence felt different than the lovely music from the night before, yet Zuko found himself slightly unsettled upon looking around the room which he knew was not his own. He moved slightly and felt something squish underneath him. He quickly retrieved the item and saw the dragon looking back at him.

He swallowed before pulling the stuffed animal into his chest.

The sun outside was starting to rise, yet he didn't feel like getting out of bed and instead lay there looking at the wall while holding onto the toy. One small hand creapt under his head to support his head while he contemplated what he would do next. His normal routine meant waking up and his mother coming in to help him dress before breakfast. He then spent the day with the tutors.

"Not that I really want to be there."

Zuko let out a sigh and turned onto his back while still clutching the dragon to his chest. His golden colored eyes took in the ceiling of his room while he tried imagining Lu Ten coming home instead of the fate which actually occurred. Nothing came and he found himself taking a deep breath.

"Nothing's the same."

The sound of the door opening made Zuko sit up, but a grin spread across his face upon seeing the person entering. A smile spread across Iroh's face before he bounded out of the bed and wrapped his arms around his uncle's thick waist. Gone were the armour his uncle wore the day before, yet the man still gave off a comforting pressance.

"So, are you ready for me to tell you what the plans for today are?"

"Yes." Zuko pulled back and stood at attention while holding his hands behind his back. He watched his uncle's smile falter.

"Something the matter?"

"I was thinking of Lu Ten."

"I see." Iroh reached out and ruffled the top of Zuko's head messing up the style his mother put his hair in. "Well, one of today's tasks is teaching you how to dress so you can do this on your own if you need to. While we in the royal family do have attendants, sometimes we find ourselves in situations where we need to care for ourselves. Plus, you won't have to worry about Lady Akane and the other attendants attempting to dress you except for major circumstances. In that regard, you're also old enough for a male attendant, so I'll have her see to that."

Zuko frowned, wondering if he needed to know all of that. He instead followed Iroh's instructions regarding how to dress himself and do the hairstyle his mother favored for him. He felt his bottom lip jut out slightly upon thinking of her and interrupted his uncle informing him of breakfast being the next task. "I miss her."

"Your mother?"

"She didn't do anything wrong. Or was encouraging me the wrong thing?"

"What do you mean?"

"I messed up in front of Fi… grandfather. She told me I needed to keep trying no matter how much I fail. I'm sure grandfather heard."

"I think grandfather is far more upset with Ozai than Ursa."

Zuko's eyes blinked and tilted his head back so he could look up at his uncle. "You called him grandfather and not father."

"Oh, well that is normal." Iroh's eyes blinked before his grin widened. "I guess you never heard Ozai reference him as anything but Fire Lord, right?"

Zuko shook his head. "Grandfather isn't as scary as…" He paused, frowning. "Isn't the Fire Lord supposed to insteal fear into people?"

"I think that depends." Iroh helped Zuko's small hands figure out how to tie the knot. "See, a Fire Lord wants to insteal fear because he wants his people to see him as powerful, yet he also wants to balance that out with benevolence so his people trust and have faith in him. The direction this balance leans depends on the time frame. That's why he asked you about what kind of Fire Lord you wanted to be. You will be Fire Lord during a time of peace and thus you'll want to lean in the other direction Zuko."

"Oh."

The door opened and Zuko glanced up. His golden eyes widened upon seeing the woman from the day before along with a few others. They brought with them a couple of treys containing breakfast. From behind he heard the sound of Iroh's hands clap together. "Ah! Good timing Lady Akane. We just finished."

Zuko frowned. A quick glance in the mirror showed his clothes weren't neat like he normally wore them. His uncle motioned for him to join him on the floor where Lady Akane set the treys of food. Zuko hurried over and sat in front of his trey of food. He ate slightly more than the day before; the fear of his grandfather no longer hindered his mind.

"This morning you'll be paying a visit to the royal physisians."

Zuko's head darted up. "Why?"

Iroh's eyes blinked. "Because… I'm not sure how to explain that one."

"Is it to make sure…"

His uncle was quick in correcting him. "No. It's not to prove you're worthy or not. It's more of…" The smile left Iroh's face. "Your grandfather and I are worried Ozai didn't just neglect you emotionally and mentally. We're hoping the physician will help us formulate a plan on how to best help you."

"I see." Zuko glanced away. "That is where we are heading after breakfast?"

"Yes."

He found himself staring at the food and taking only a few more bites. Iroh chatted away telling him some sort of story, yet Zuko's mind didn't register what his uncle said. Eventually, "Zuko?"

"Yes?"

"Perhaps we should just go and see the physician? Afterall, you seem as if you don't wish to eat anymore?"

Zuko didn't respond and stared at his food.

"Zuko? Are you worried about the visit? How have your previous visits gone?"

"I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"I'm not unhealthy. I think father was hoping they'd say I was. If I was unhealthy…"

"Don't think like that."

"You know it's true. You know he'd rather I be dead."

"That…" Iroh's hands clenched slightly. "Perhaps this afternoon we should discuss why you would think like that?" Zuko glanced away. "Or perhaps that is a conversation you and I have another day? We can do something for fun instead."

"I guess." Zuko took a deep breath. "You don't have to go through so much trouble for me."

"You're worth the trouble. I'd go to the end of the world for both you and Lu Ten you know."

"You've been thinking about visiting the spirit world, haven't you?"

"Now why would you say that?"

"Isn't the spirit world the end of the world?"

"I guess you could say that. Don't mention this theory of yours to your grandfather. It will simply make him worry for not." Iroh let out a laugh. "It must seem strange hearing me say that of the Fire Lord."

"Yes. You're General Iroh, after all."

"Well, let's head to the physisians now." Iroh stood and held out his hand for Zuko's. The young prince took his hand and followed after the man. Visiting the royal physicians was nothing new, and yet the path Zuko took with his uncle was in fact a new one. Upon arrival he saw a different member of the royal physicians waiting for him than the one his father allocated for him and Azula.

In the back of his mind he wondered how many other things would change.


	11. Examine

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Examine_**

In the back of his mind, Iroh knew he felt as nervous about the visit to the royal physician as Zuko did. He didn't like making Zuko feel as if they were checking on his adequacy, yet he also found himself as worried about Zuko's eating habits as his father Holding onto Iroh's small hand helped; he noticed the boy's hands weren't yet calloused like his and Lu Ten's were.

They arrived at the royal physician and found Azulon also waiting for them. Iroh watches Zuko's eyes go wide before looking up at him while the physician bowed. "Your grandfather is worried about your wellbeing as well."

"Welcome, Esteemed Prince Zuko." The physician remained in the bow. "Your grandfather has sworn me to secrecy regarding the change in the family until it can officially be announced, so you need not worry about that. I will also take good care of you."

Zuko's golden eyes looked at the man in confusion. Iroh let go of his hand and pushed on the middle of his back. "Go on." Zuko hesitated. "Would you like your grandfather and me to step out of the room? Would that make you more comfortable?"

The young prince shook his head, yet Iroh imagined wanting an adult family member around during such visits with the royal physician given the fact Zuko would soon hit puberty; he remembered Lu Ten stopped wanting family with him around this time if not earlier.

Iroh sat down and watched the physician go to work examining the young prince. The man examined carefully the records in front of him, yet frowned when listening to Zuko's lungs. When he finished, Azulon spoke. "The first order of business is to discuss my worries regarding Prince Zuko's eating habits."

"By that you mean whether he's been getting enough nutrition for his growing body." The physician turned towards Zuko. "Prince Zuko, has anyone told you that eating is important to grow stronger?"

"Mother."

"Anybody else?" Zuko shook his head.

"This next question may feel a bit intrusive, but how much do you eat compared to others your age."

Iroh watched Zuko frown. "I only have Azula to compare with."

"I see. Is it less or more."

"Less."

Azulon's hands tightened allowing Iroh the chance of seeing the whites of his father's knuckles. "So he starved you as well?"

"No." Zuko glanced at his grandfather. "I'm just slow."

"What do you mean by that, Prince Zuko?"

"I don't typically finish before dinner is over. Azula is also quicker, everyone is."

"Alright. Do you have a reason for eating slow?"

"I don't like being messy."

Iroh saw the anger on his father's face, but so did Zuko. He decided to intervene this time. "Is this because Ozai doesn't like it?"

"No. I don't like it."

The answer certainly wasn't expected. The physician jotted down a few notes. "We definitely need to get your nutritional intake up. With permission from the Fire Lord and General Iroh, I would like to oversee your nutritional intake."

"Yes. You have our permission."

One of Iroh's eyebrows shot up, yet he didn't argue with his father regarding the giving of permission. "What would this overseeing consist of?"

The man frowned. "Would it be possible if I talk to the Fire Lord and General Iroh alone?"

"Am I in trouble?"

"No, Esteemed Prince Zuko, you are not. However, these are things for adults to worry about."

"I see." Zuko glanced over at his grandfather who nodded his head.

As Zuko left the room, Iroh reached out and squeezed his shoulder. "I'll be out soon."

The door closed behind. The Fire Lord looked at the royal physician in irritation. "What was it you couldn't discuss in front of my grandson?"

"Were either of you aware of the fact the prince was born prematurely?"

Iroh's eyes widened. "Ozai said nothing."

"Prince Ozai also insisted the physicians attending at the time were wrong and didn't wish to listen to what we suggest regarding…" The physician stopped short.

"May I see the record for Prince Zuko's birth?"

"Yes, Fire Lord." The physician handed the record over to Fire Lord Azulon.

"I see."

"You see what, father?"

"Nothing you need to worry yourself about at this time Iroh."

Iroh watched his father hand the document back. For a brief second, he wanted to go against his father and see what his father saw. He instead chose to redirect the conversation. "Is the fact Zuko was born prematurely and issue?"

"When a child is born prematurely, they need extra care, care Prince Ozai didn't feel Prince Zuko needed, but he became frustrated when Prince Zuko didn't reach certain goals at the same time as his peers. This is actually expected when a child is born prematurely that they'll meet certain goals later. This actually includes learning the coordination required to eat at the pace their peers do, yet Prince Ozai's been insistent about the issue lies elsewhere."

"Prince Zuko's also struggles with Fire Bending. He's behind his peers."

"That's understandable given the fact Prince Zuko's breathing issues were never properly addressed. This is something he's struggled with since infancy, but it also isn't something that can't be remedied."

"This is because Prince Ozai was yet again neglectful?"

"I wouldn't say intentionally neglectful. Prince Ozai was definitely in denial that Prince Zuko was premature, Fire Lord. He was also rather ignorant regarding the fact we royal physicians actually know how to do our job and honestly thinks he knows better."

"Yes. Prince Ozai is arrogant."

"I guess teaching tsungi horn to Prince Zuko is a definite must as this will definitely help strengthen his lungs." Iroh sighed. "I guess I know what he and I will be doing this afternoon."

"Is there anything else we should know."

"Prince Zuko's coordination is behind his peers. While it may appear he is clumsy it is more of his body needs more time to get used to certain motions."

"Something _he_ didn't have the patience for, yet I suspect he couldn't care less if Prince Zuko died as he's focuses his attention on the child who did hit all of the markers on time. I am not looking forward to his report regarding Zuko's studies. Will you write up other suggestions for Prince Zuko in regards to strengthening his lungs and body? Send them to my son, Prince Iroh."

"Yes. I will send them to Prince Iroh." The royal physician bowed. "Thank you for allowing me to care for the prince."

"No need to thank me, as you are doing the task you've been assigned and trained for."

"I think I'll go and see Zuko." Iroh pushed himself up from the chair and headed to the door. He found Zuko leaning up against the wall looking at his feet. The boy shuffled slightly, yet didn't look him in the eye. "Oh. You're not going to let me see those handsome eyes of yours?"

Zuko's head darted up allowing Iroh to see the boy's golden eyes. "What did he say?"

"Nothing bad. A lot of good. He's actually going to send me some advice that will help me help you."

"How?" Zuko's lips pushed together.

"Why, with breath control of course. And helping you with coordination." Iroh watched the boy's face contort with confusion. "I told you this visit wasn't about figuring out if you were worthy of your position as my heir, but about us figuring out what we should do to help you."

The relief on Zuko's face was exhilarating.


	12. Tsungi Horn

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Tsungi Horn_**

Not knowing what his uncle and grandfather discussed with the royal physician made his head spin. Despite Iroh's reassurances the examination was in order that his family might better help Zuko, he couldn't help but think otherwise. His father drilled into his head how much a failure he was compared to Azula; Zuko couldn't help but think about what flaws the examination revealed.

"You should eat, Zuko, rather than worrying about whatever you're worried about."

Zuko's head turned away from his uncle who spoke towards the physician who examined him earlier. The man scribbled his notes down, but he noticed Zuko was watching him. "Don't mind me, esteemed Prince Zuko. I'm simply making notes so your meals may be better planned.

"Okay." In a way, what the royal physician said made sense, yet for some reason Zuko's fear of failing their expectations didn't go away so easily. Every so often he'd look up at the man while he ate. Despite the uneasy feeling with the man there, he found the meal much more relaxing than the meals he ate with Azula. Azula always found a way of twisting him into knots emotionally. Eventually his stomach filled and he couldn't eat anymore. He found himself looking up at his uncle waiting.

Iroh already finished his meal and simply sipped his tea, proving far more patient with Zuko than Ozai ever was. Meals ended when he and the rest of the family finished. "Are you full?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good. Then we'll start your first lesson on the tsunagi horn. Let's go and get the instrument from Lu Ten's room and find a nice place in the garden."

Zuko's blinked back the confusion, for his only lesson which took place outside was Firebending. He took his uncle's calloused hand finding comfort in the touch. A calm washed over him while they headed back towards Lu Ten's room. Without realizing, a smile spread across his face. The change regarding his status in the family still bothered him, yet he always enjoyed spending time with his uncle and Lu Ten. "_I intend to keep Lu Ten's promise to you regarding teaching you._"

When they entered Lu Ten's room, Zuko saw the stuffed animal sitting on the bed. In the back of his mind, he didn't know how Lu Ten would feel about the situation, given the fact Lu Ten couldn't vocalize how he felt. Iroh's zeal made Zuko quickly forget that train of thought as the man scooped up the instrument, he played the night before. Zuko's eyes closed briefly, the memory of the music from the night before still fresh in his mind.

Iroh took his hand again, and they headed out towards one of the nearby gardens. Zuko found himself taking in the warm sunshine and closed his eyes while breathing in the scented air. He heard the sound of water from the nearby fountain. "Doesn't this place make you feel at ease?"

"I'm not sure exactly what that means, but I guess that is so." Zuko opened his eyes and watched his uncle take a seat on the edge of the fountain. The man patted the spot near him indicating Zuko should sit down next to him. He found himself complying. Iroh set the instrument into Zuko's lap.

The feeling of the instrument felt different at first, but then his small hands grabbed onto the instrument. Iroh adjusted Zuko's positioning and the instrument felt more comfortable. "The first thing you're going to learn is how to effectively make sound with the tsungi horn. Try blowing into the mouthpiece."

Zuko took a deep breath and blew into the instrument allowing a sound to come out. A frown spread across his face. "That sounds awful. Nothing like what you did last night."

Iroh let out a chuckle. "Well, learning to make the right sounds will take practice, but you should also learn what kinds of sound the horn will make based on how you breathe into the horn. That's why this is a good way of practicing breath control."

The young Firebender took a deep breath and tried again, this time bringing a different sound from the horn. The different sound from the horn made Zuko understand what his uncle meant. Slowly, he started experimenting with how he breathed which resulted in different sounds coming from the Tsungi horn. Eventually, the sound coming from the instrument formed some form of melody, yet…

"It's still rough."

"Don't worry, Zuko. You will gain more control over the instrument with practice and as you gain more breath control. Do you want to continue, or…" Iroh stopped speaking; instead, Zuko's uncle eyed a specific part of the garden. Something obviously bothered the man.

Zuko turned his head and saw exactly what bothered his uncle. The sight made him lean into the man. One hand tightened around Iroh's robes.

Ozai stood with a stack of papers tucked under one arm while Azula stood beside him. Zuko wondered what his father and sister were doing there. Iroh placed a hand gently on Zuko's back. "What do you want?"

"I am doing as I was told. These are the records regarding Zuko's lessons. I'm delivering them today as the Fire Lord requested."

"Yes, but you could have had a servant deliver this for you."

"I decided a task as important as this was something I needed to handle myself."

"I see. Is that really the reason?"

"Azula wished to see Zuko."

"I'm sure."

"Are you going to discuss the information I brought with me?"

Iroh let out a sigh. The sound of frustration in the sigh made Zuko worried. "So long as we don't go too far away from the children."

"Oh? I'll do as you wish, nii-sama?"

Zuko swallowed back his nervousness. The pat on his back from Iroh didn't comfort him as his uncle wanted. He watched Iroh walk with Ozai a few feet away. The man began whispering regarding the information Ozai brought. Any wondering regarding what they spoke of quickly fled Zuko's mind upon hearing Azula's voice.

"Zuzu."

"Don't call me that." Zuko turned and glared at Azula.

"Oh? Am I supposed to call you Esteemed Prince Zuko now?"

"What do you want Azula?"

"Didn't you hear father? I wanted to see you."

"You never want anything to do with me unless you're up to something."

"Fine. I'll get to the point. You're a traitor."

Zuko glanced over towards Ozai and Iroh. Both were still busy talking, yet Iroh seemed displeased regarding something. "What are you talking about?"

"You betrayed father. You shouldn't have agreed to become Uncle Iroh's child."

"I didn't have a choice in the matter."

"Are you sure? Because…"

"Stop it." Zuko looked down at the tsungi horn still in his lap.

"You think I'm lying?"

"You lied about grandfather ordering father to kill me."

"Grandfather is just covering up for the fact he gave that order."

Zuko's eyes widened. He took a deep breath. Azula spoke his fears, yet something didn't seem right. The actions of the Fire Lord didn't add up to someone who was covering for a mistake they made. "I don't believe you."

"Well, don't. Uncle Iroh doesn't seem pleased regarding your progress with our tutors."

The young Firebender's head darted up. The look on Iroh's face did indicate displeasure, yet the choice words which came from Iroh's mouth seemed directed at Ozai. His eyes drifted down towards the ground. He hopes Iroh would finish soon so both Ozai and Azula would go away.


	13. Uphill

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Uphill_**

Every step forward with Zuko resulted in what felt like two steps back. The physician's presence made the young prince wary, yet Iroh found himself relieved when the physician gave Zuko a valid explanation regarding his presence which didn't involve the medical worries Iroh and Zulon held for the young heir. After the meal, Iroh felt relaxed as he and Zuko walked through the garden and started practicing the horn.

Then Ozai showed up.

There was no doubt in Iroh's mind. Ozai purposefully took advantage of Azulon's order regarding turning over the information regarding Zuko's lessons in hopes of agitating the young prince. Iroh couldn't mistake the intent for anything else, but the presence of Azula felt like a confirmation. Iroh stepped aside so Zuko wouldn't hear anything Ozai said, yet stayed close enough as he didn't trust Azulon.

Ozai handed over the papers he brought with a rather smug look on his face. A cursory look dissatisfied Iroh; the notes indicated a poor showing regarding Zuko's academics. His eyes flickered up towards his brother's questioning the man's motivations. Ozai opened his mouth. "I don't know what you were expecting."

"Excuse me?"

"Zuko is not Azula, as evident by the records I've given you."

Iroh's eyes drifted down towards the notes regarding Zuko's progress in the various subjects. He found one glance enough to know his nephew was behind where he and Ozai were at the same age. A second glance revealed subjects such as calligraphy missing from the list-making him wonder the reason, yet he brushed this aside realizing other things which were considered proper etiquette for a young prince when he faced his own tutors weren't there, likely because Ozai thought such things useless.

"These records tell me little."

"Do I need Azula and Zuko to spar for…"

"Don't!" Iroh felt his voice strain.

"Then you're aware…"

"…you neglected Zuko's education in favor of Azula?" Iroh tucked the stack of papers under his arm. He fully intended on going over the papers more thoroughly after he retreated towards his personal study. A quick glance towards the two children made him let out a sigh. The look on Azula's face and the way Zuko didn't look him in the eye indicated she'd manipulated her older brother yet again. "Anyways, you've delivered the requested papers."

"You aren't going to let Azula spend some time with her brother? Surely you don't think she should be punished like I am being punished? She did not transgress as I did."

"You and I both know Azula isn't as innocent as you make her out to be, but it is rather obvious she's upset Zuko. That's what you wanted though, so perhaps it is time the two of you leave. If you take this as a lack of hospitality on my part, then so be it, but my concerns right now are definitely that boy."

"Good luck. Zuko's teachers found him impossible."

Iroh watched Ozai turn and head out of the garden. A quick motion with his hand made Azula follow after him. Approaching Zuko waited until the two were out of sight. He sat down and let out a deep sigh. "What did Azula say which upset you so?" Iroh glanced over; Zuko glanced away. "I'm missing those golden eyes of your's little one." He watched Zuko's head turned, but the manner in which the young prince worried his bottom list was obvious. "You can tell me the truth, you know."

"I don't want Azula to get in trouble."

The general couldn't help but let out a deep sigh. He glanced away. "I know how you feel."

"I… what?"

"I didn't want Ozai to get in trouble with father either. She's your sister, so you love her despite everything she does wrong, just like I love Ozai despite what he's done wrong."

Iroh turned his head and saw Zuko thinking over those words. The boy looked up at him with a few tears in his eyes. "Why? Why do I feel that way when what she says…" Zuko let out a sigh and leaned back on his hands slightly. "I know what she said wasn't true. Grandfather didn't change his mind to cover up an order to father to kill me. He never ordered me dead in the first place."

"I think she's jealous."

"What is there to be jealous of?"

"You don't like being my son and Lu-Ten's younger brother?"

"No. That…" Zuko looked at the ground. "It's not something I'd think she'd want."

"Well, the position does bring you closer to the throne, but I must admit I honestly don't understand either one's motives beyond that. Power – I want you to remember, dear Zuko, that power is something people covet after and some will do anything to gain that power for themselves. That's why we, as members of the royal family, must be all too aware of our surroundings and of potential assassins."

"Oh." Zuko glanced away. "Then I don't want power."

"Ah, but power allows others to protect what the love and care for. It's like a coin. One side is good, the other bad." Iroh watched Zuko turn and look at the records tucked under the man's arm.

"You didn't like what you saw, did you?"

"I noticed your record is missing subjects such as calligraphy."

"Father said we learned that well enough we didn't need to learn it anymore." Zuko's mouth twisted slightly before he turned towards Iroh. "I actually liked the calligraphy lessons. The teacher actually praised me, so I might be good at it. It was relaxing."

"We can have your calligraphy lessons continued. I'd like you to tell me who said instructor was."

"I doubt he'd return to the palace. Not after Azula didn't take his comments regarding her calligraphy well."

"Ah. So we come to the real reason Ozai stopped the lessons."

"You mean the fact Azula didn't hesitate in using Firebending against the instructor?"

Iroh took in a deep breath. "No. I was thinking your father stopped the lessons because that was something you were good at and Azula wasn't."

"No. That doesn't make any sense."

"No, it doesn't. Nothing regarding Azula makes any sense, to be honest."

_Note - I've decided this NaNoWriMo will be my first year where I work on multiple projects including an already started work - this one._


	14. A Mother's Heart

_Note – I wish to give a bit of forewarning that this chapter takes on a twist some readers may not have been expecting. I'll explain more at the end of the chapter._

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_A Mother's Heart_**

Azulon's decision left her feeling…

In truth, Ursa struggled with how she felt regarding Azulon's decision regarding Zuko, her own flesh and blood. Over and over again she told her son that _being_ himself was enough, but that he should take pride in the fact he kept trying and never gave up. Of course, Ozai's plans always went against her own, not to mention the fact she found herself stuck playing a role, much like the actresses she admired in the plays she took her children to see.

In fact, she found herself falling in love with the theater and the concept of _being_ something you weren't; this, in turn, helped her deal with her relationship with Ozai. On the surface, she was Princess Ursa, the young woman taken from her home at a young age because she was miraculously the first daughter of Avatar Roku's line born since her own mother which in turn made her a prized treasure among the noble families in the Fire Nation. She was the treasure Fire Lord Azulon seized so none of the other nobles might have her; he'd even arranged for the attendants who would help raise and groom her for the role.

Under the surface, she was just Ursa, someone few actually got to know.

There was no getting around the fact the loss of Zuko shook both of her personas, for neither one would willingly give up _that_ precious child, but instead would fight tooth and nail for the boy. She felt numb with grief for a child who'd not actually died, the denial of what happened not yet sinking in when Lord Azulon summoned her. The young princess found herself taking a deep breath as servants escorted her towards her honored father's inner sanctuary.

She found the man sitting in his chair waiting for her, looking right at her. Instantly, her eyes dropped to the ground in shame - shame for what her husband did, but shame for having her child taken away from her by the Fire Lord himself. "Ursa, me dear Ursa. Is something troubling you?"

"I apologize father, but I do not feel precious right now."

"I'm the one who should be appologizing, for I'd not thought about what effect giving Zuko to Iroh would have. Iroh set me straight, but I've come to a solution. You will remain the boy's mother."

A feeling of dread spread through her soul, hitting first in the chest area before spreading down towards her stomach. Her head darted up while her eyes widened. "Father, please tell me you don't wish for me to divorce Ozai and marry Iroh?"

"No. I've punished him enough, but in punishing him - I should not punish the woman who spoke up for the sake of her child and encouraged him to never give up despite his struggle. When the official ceremony occurs, you will still remain known as Zuko's mother, but this also elevates you in status despite the fact you are not married to Iroh. It's a position you well deserve."

"Do I?" Ursa's head darted up, the fear lingering while she looked upon the man sitting in the chair surrounded by ornate gold fixtures upon red.

She watched one of Azulon's eyes lift up, almost as if the Fire Lord were pondering something. "My precious daughter, are you with child yet again?"

Heat spread across Ursa's face, yet she imagined in her mind the color of her face now matched her robes. She hated the fact the Fire Lord was good at discerning certain things, yet she felt as if he'd broken past the mask of Princess Ursa to the real Ursa, which in turn meant he'd discovered her horrible, dark secret. "I… uh…"

"The Fire Lord does not want to see any harm come to his great-grandchild, Princess Ursa."

Ursa felt her entire body shake uncontrollably upon hearing the Fire Lord not hold back in letting her know he knew. She found herself collapsing to her knees, but heavy sobs escaped from her throat. Instinctively, she wrapped her arms around her stomach to protect not herself, but the secret she'd wanted kept secret. "Please forgive me."

"Forgive you? I should have listened to Ilah regarding your marriage to Ozai."

"I know." Ursa felt hot tears fall down her cheeks. "I know she didn't want me to marry Ozai. I was never good enough…"

"No." The tone of voice used by the Fire Lord was sharp, yet Ursa found herself unable to cry out of fear when she heard the man rise from his chair and approach her. She didn't expect his arms to wrap around her shoulders pulling her into a gentle hug few knew Azulon capable of. "No. Ilah wanted me to marry you to Lu Ten, but I - out of the love of my youngest, didn't want to go back on my promise to him."

The tears again started flowing, soaking the robe of one Fire Lord creating what Ursa imagined a pitiful sight. She cried tears of relief - that he'd forgiven her so easily, yet tears of relief that she might actually freely cry for the great loss she felt all around. In the back of her mind, she wondered how the Fire Lord knew Ozai wasn't the father, yet couldn't fathom asking how he knew.

"I am so sorry Ozai neglected you the way he did, my dear daughter, but Ilah will never forgive me for putting one of her precious daughters into such a situation. Forgive me for not noticing sooner, before I could rectify the situation. I promise you, I will not allow any harm come to you or this child."

"Please. Please don't tell Iroh. Don't ruin his image of Lu Ten."

She felt the Fire Lord stiffen, yet felt him pull her into the hug tighter. "While it saddens me not to tell him of such a joy, I respect your wishes for him not to know further sadness. Your secret and that of the child will not pass from my lips to his ears or the ears of anyone else. Not unless the need arises."

"I'm sorry, father."

"Shush. There is nothing for me to forgive." Azulon spoke in a soft tone. "How about we speak of other matters, such as how your dear Zuko is fairing?" The man who was the only father she'd known in her life pulled away, but gently brushed away the remaining tears.

"My Zuko. How is he?"

Azulon took a deep breath. "Adjusting to the change is not easy for him, but I think the fact you can freely visit him when you want to should alleviate the matter." His arms gripped hers lightly, but a serious look passed his face. "I can not, though, allow him to freely visit your place. I do not trust Ozai, nor do I trust Azula."

"I know. I wish I didn't." Ursa looked towards the ground, feeling guilty for covering for Ozai. She felt a loose lock of hair brushed away.

"Don't apologize for them. I will make it clear to Ozai that he is not to take his anger at his punishment out on you, but when the time is right - for I guess you've not told him about the child - not to harm the child either. Not a word to him about who the real father is either."

"I'm…"

Azulon held a finger to her lips. "No apologies from you, my dear Ursa. Iroh is seeing to Zuko's neglected education, but one of the royal physicians is seeing to rectifying the fact Ozai ignored the fact Zuko was born prematurely."

Ursa felt like her blood froze over. "You know that Zuko was born prematurely?"

"I do. He will be taken care of, but I promise you the damage to his soul and being Ozai caused by his neglect will be rectified."

"Thank you." Both Princess Ursa and the Ursa kept hidden felt grateful to the man in front of her for so many reasons.

_Note – _

_The search always bothered me narratively. Ursa spiting Ozai by claiming Zuko was actually the child of her lover doesn't make sense due to the fact this action would put Zuko at risk of retaliation from Ozai. In addition to this, the part regarding Avatar Roku hiding his female descendants didn't make sense either given the fact he was hiding his descendant from her destiny, but this sounded like a convenient method of making it so she could have a lover._

_How could the scenario of Ozai not bring Zuko's father work? My thoughts went straight to Lu Ten; I remembered the single tear Ursa shed when she read of his death. Of course, there is the issue of the age gap between Lu Ten and Zuko. There are only three times we see Lu Ten._

_One of the times we see Lu Ten is a flashback during The Beach episode. In this scene the age gap between Lu Ten and Zuko appears to be ten years, yet this flashback is also from Zuko's point of view – he's a baby at the time. Added to this, we see a flashback of Iroh and Lu Ten when Lu Ten was around the age Zuko was when Lu Ten died. Iroh looks younger in this flashback, where as the flashback of Zuko's shows Iroh is rather old at the time. Added to this, the third time – the picture of Lu Ten right before he died is someone in their mid to late twenties, not someone in their early twenties._

_6/19/2020 - While it is true Iroh as the General of the Fire Nation couldn't have left the Siege of Ba Sing Se during the two years the siege occurred, the same can not be said of Lu Ten. On top of us not knowing when Lu Ten joined his father, there are situations which might bring Lu Ten back to the Fire Nation capital such as Iroh needing to send messages regarding the progress of the siege back to the Fire Lord, some more sensitive than others. Hopefully this clears up some confusion certain readers might have._


	15. Precious Surprises

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Precious Surprises_**

Zuko's eyes opened to the sensation of the sun rising. He stretched his limbs out while his small hand reached for the dragon resting next to him on the bed. "Do you think things will go okay today, Lu Ten?"

The run-in with his father - his biological father - remained fixated in his mind as did his interaction with Azula. Despite the sun beckoning him to awake, he wasn't sure if he wanted to get up - at least not until his Uncle Iroh came to retrieve him. Nothing happened while Iroh was away leaving him excited about spending time with his male relative.

A sigh escaped.

Zuko sat up knowing he would need to get up, yet he found himself clutching the dragon to his chest. The sound of the door opening made Zuko lookup. His golden eyes blinked a few times, but a smile spread across his face. "Grandfather!"

He let the toy drop down onto the bed while he hurried over towards the Fire Lord not caring that the man was a formidable man. The man came down to his height while the guards looked away in order that the two might have some privacy, but his arms wrapped the boy into a hug. Zuko buried his face into the man's rich robes and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Do you like that dragon toy?"

Zuko's eyes blinked; he turned his head and looked at the toy resting on his bed. "It makes me feel Lu Ten is near." A thought crossed his mind making him look up to the man for an honest answer. "Is that wrong?"

"Do, dear child?" The man touched Zuko's head lightly. "I stopped by today because today is going to be a rather exciting day for you. Iroh will be introducing you to the first of your teachers…" Zuko drew in his deep breath. "You don't look like you're excited by this?"

"I'm not good at my studies."

"Well, this first teacher I think will please you, but Iroh will have kept a promise to you. However, I can't go into that as it will ruin his surprise for you, yet I've my own surprise you will hopefully enjoy later on."

"Oh." Zuko glanced at the ground. "I guess I'll get ready then."

"I look forward to seeing you later."

Zuko stood there watching the Fire Lord leave, yet he wasn't sure how to feel. He did make an attempt at doing his own robing, which received high praised and tips on how to improve from his uncle which in turn made a smile spread across his face. "Come. Let's meet your new teacher."

"Are we going to the classroom?" Zuko fell into step with Iroh as he took the man's calloused hand, taking in the familiar feeling of the many callouses.

Iroh's eyes blinked. "Oh. You mean the classroom you attended with Azula. No. You'll be taking lessons in the classroom Lu Ten took lessons in, but Ozai and I before him."

Zuko's eyes widened in surprise. "Oh."

The thought of attending lessons in the room Lu Ten did quickly lightened his mood. His eyes widened, even more, when he walked through the door with his uncle, but his breath drew in deeply from the excitement he felt.

"Welcome to my classroom, esteemed Prince Zuko. I am quite pleased to be teaching one of my favorite pupils again."

Zuko's eyes widened even more, but his head turned so he might look up at Iroh. The man took great delight in his pleasure. "I promised you would have your calligraphy lessons again."

Without anyone bidding him, Zuko hurried forward and sat down at the small desk taking on the posture expected of a prince. He watched one of his calligraphy teacher's eyes drift up. "I'm glad my student hasn't forgotten the proper posture I taught him, but we will start with refreshing our memory on past lessons before moving onto the next one."

The lesson passed quickly; he didn't notice Iroh come and go until his uncle spoke up. "I believe it is time that Prince Zuko and I join the Fire Lord for lunch."

"I am pleased to say, General Iroh, that Prince Zuko has remembered most, if not all of his lessons and needed only a small refresher on a few minor details."

"Well, I must say I am quite pleased with Prince Zuko's progress already." Iroh held out his hand and Zuko yet again felt the callouses on his uncle's hands. As they left, he turned and sent a grateful smile towards his calligraphy teacher, yet a warm, fuzzy feeling spread from the center of his core and out towards his fingers and toes.

When they arrived for lunch, Zuko found many of the items were finger foods; the fact he need not worry about making a mess of himself in front of the Fire Lord was delightful. A knock came at the door which slid open. "The toymaker is here, Fire Lord Azulon."

Zuko's golden eyes blinked before he looked at his grandfather. "I know you delight in the dragon toy as it reminds you of Lu Ten, but I hope you delight in this gift as well."

The sound of the toymaker entering echoed across the floor. Zuko watched the man approach and repositioned himself so he could look at the man. The man bowed low and held out the familiar-looking toy before turning his head to look at his grandfather. "For me?"

The smile on the man's face confirmed as much. Zuko reached out for the toy - a replica of the one Azula destroyed and held it to his chest. The toymaker spoke, yet didn't lift his head. "Is the esteemed Prince Zuko pleased."

"Yes. Thank you."

"May I take my leave now?"

"Yes. I might be in need of your services soon, but I will send details regarding the commission to your workshop."

"Thank you for your patronage Fire Lord Azulon. Thank you for enjoying my work esteemed Prince Zuko." The man bowed again, yet his head never lifted high enough to see the Fire Lord's face. Zuko didn't ponder this much. Instead, his mind turned to his grandfather mentioning he might need the toymakers services again soon.

As such, he spoke up once the servants left, yet hoped he wasn't out of turn for speaking. He clutched the toy tighter for comfort. "Mother and father are having another child, aren't they."

Zuko heard Iroh drew his breath in, yet expected a lecture from his grandfather speaking out of turn. In his head, he heard Ozai lecturing him for the breach of etiquette. "I must apologize to you, Prince Zuko. I forgot you are an intelligent young man."

"Then Ursa is with child?"

"I promised her I would not let anyone know until she was ready, yet it never crossed my mind that my words just now would give that away. As such, I would appreciate if neither of you said so."

"I promise."

"Zuko…"

Zuko couldn't look the Fire Lord in the face.

"When the time comes, would you like to help me draw up the commission for the toymaker? I'd love your input regarding what kind of toy the new prince or princess would like. I also promise you that they're not trying to replace you."

Zuko looked up and smiled at the man, yet what he just learned still bothered him.


	16. Companionship

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Companionship_**

"_… __they're not trying to replace you."_

No matter how much Zuko attempted playing his grandfather's words over in his head, he couldn't help but feel as if he _were_ being replaced. "_After all, he wouldn't hesitate to replace you with Azula for being a failure when you were born. Why wouldn't he try and replace the male heir with another heir…_"

A deep sigh escaped from Zuko's mouth. "_Fine. I'll get to the point. You're a traitor._"

Zuko pulled the two toys closer to his chest, but let his mouth firmly set. A few tears welled in his golden eyes as he looked at his knees attempting not to cry, even though no one else was in the room. There was no telling when someone else would happen upon him, but a knock on the door confirmed as much.

He quickly wiped away the tears and took a deep breath, yet his emotions still tried getting the better of him. "Yes."

Lady Akane opened the door. "You have a few guests today, Prince Zuko."

"Wait. No studies?"

"The life of a prince isn't always about duties and work. Care to come with me?"

Zuko slid from the bed but glanced towards the door. "Where's un… father?"

He watched Akane turn and smile at him. "It's alright if you still call General Iroh uncle in front of me, but the ceremony which will solidify you as his son in front of the entire kingdom hasn't occurred yet. That is actually what he and Fire Lord Azulon are seeing today. They requested you have a break from lessons."

"But I like my calligraphy lessons."

"Oh?"

"And I miss Firebending lessons. I'm behind Azula enough as it is."

"You are keeping up with your breathing exercises?"

"I do them every morning! Uncle says they're good for - for, something to do with waking up."

"Possibly waking up well and refreshed?"

"Yes. That."

A laugh escaped her mouth. "Well, I think some of our soldiers both Firebender and regulars alike could benefit from such advice. The general has always given wonderful advice."

"I know. Uncle is amazing." Without realizing it, Zuko let his hand slip into Lady Akane's; she in some ways reminded him of his mother, but more in a grandmotherly way. She didn't reject his small hand, nor did he see her smile softly down on him as he kept pace on their way to see his guests.

He wasn't expecting to see two youth waiting for him, but found himself ducking - almost shamefully - behind Lady Akane at the sight of the two boys.

"Akira…" The taller of the two boys turned at the said name, but addressed Lady Akane as…

"Grandmother." He looked at her with a bright smile

"… and Hideki." The other boy was already turning, yet not as quickly as Akira did. His eyes drifted down to Zuko, his mouth forming a circle. "This is Prince Zuko."

The smile left Akira's face, but fright appeared on Hideki. Zuko tried looking the two boys in the eyes, yet felt his entire body tremble. He couldn't open his mouth in greeting; words escaped him. He felt his fingers twist into Lady Akane's robes, but he attempted swallowing back his anxiety.

"The two of you have been selected to be Prince Zuko's companions. I'll be nearby if you need anything." She extracted herself and her clothing from Zuko's grip and left him standing there, staring at the two boys who in turn stared back.

"Is he…" Hideki finally spoke, allowing Zuko the first chance to hear the other boy's voice. "Is he crying?"

"Hey. Don't be so hard on him."

"Yes, but he's…"

"You know as well as anyone there's been a death in the royal family."

"What does that…" Hideki let out an irritated sound, yet Zuko now couldn't see either of their faces. "I don't want to be some kind of babysitter in charge of dressing…"

"I can dress!" Zuko lifted his head, trying to muster as much confidence as possible, yet he didn't feel confident at all. Any confidence he might have had shattered upon seeing the two boys looking at him dumbfounded; he felt himself collapsing to his knees, almost choking.

Akira hurried forward but turned to the other boy. "Hideki, go get my grandmother."

The tears which Zuko attempted holding in tumbled out; he felt them falling onto his hands, yet the shame he felt…

He heard the taller boy approach but saw him kneel down. The boy didn't make any move to comfort. He heard Lady Akane hurrying back. He heard Hideki say, "we didn't do anything, honest."

"Oh dear. I should have informed you two that Zuko's had a rather stressful time of late, but that he's never interacted with any young man his own age before this." She then said, "The hope was - is - that you and he could form a bond like your father did with Prince Lu Ten."

A hand - one larger than his own - reached out and grabbed onto the back of Zuko's clothing which in turn made Zuko stop crying. His mind quickly drifted towards what Azula might do, but Hideki's voice indicated he didn't like what Akira was doing either. "Akira! What are…"

Zuko felt pulled up and then into the other boy's lap. The arms of the other boy wrapped around him, but he found himself reminded quickly of how Lu Ten used to pull him into a hug. The tears started flowing again, but he found himself crying into the shirt of some stranger as they lightly touched the back of his head and shushed him.

Eventually, he calmed and extracted himself. He wiped the tears away. "S…sorry."

"Don't apologize Zuko." Akira's voice made Zuko glance up. The young man smiled. "I get what grandmother was saying, though I don't think our relationship can be quite like my father and Prince Lu Ten's was, given that I'm a couple of years older than you and they were the same age."

"What was…" Zuko frowned.

"They were like brothers. Actually, I remember overhearing Prince Lu Ten talking to my father about you."

Zuko saw Akira's face falter. "What's wrong?"

Akira let out a sigh but then smiled. He placed a hand behind his head. "It felt a little odd trying to act exactly like they did given that I'm older than you, so I did what I would have done for any of my younger siblings, though to be honest - you're older than any of them. Apologies."

"No. It's okay." Zuko wiped away some more tears before looking down. He noticed Hideki looking back and forth between the two as he spoke. "I miss Lu Ten."

"Is it really true you've not interacted with anyone your own age?"

That though wasn't true. Zuko bristled, his shoulders tensing. "Girls are dumb!"

"Wait? Prince Zuko and I are the same age? He's smaller than me."

"Wait. I'm small?"

Akira let out a laugh. "Goodness. I forgot Princess Azula is only a couple of years younger than you."

"Then there's her dumb friends."

"Wait. Why is it Princess Azula's allowed to interact with those her own age, but…"

"She's better at everything." Zuko watched Akira and Hideki glance at each other as if this revelation bothered him.

"Oh. Is she better at laughing when she gets tickled?" Akira dove in, but soon Zuko's laughter rang through the courtyard, for he couldn't control the laughter escaping from his lungs.


	17. Promises

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Promises_**

He definitely remembered overhearing Lu Ten discuss Prince Zuko with his father.

"_He's such a warm-hearted child, but he's what I look forward to coming home to - that smile of his._"

Of course, Prince Lu Ten didn't come home, but his father did. The smile Prince Lu Ten admired was missing, yet the manner in which Zuko gripped onto his clothing - Akira couldn't blame Zuko for feeling the way he did. He remembered looking up at the Prince with admiration, yet in the back of his mind warm-hearted also fit Lu Ten.

His father returned home.

His father returned home to black banners instead of the trappings of victory. The grief felt…

Akira almost let slip his suspicions his father blamed himself for Lu Ten not coming home, yet the household seemingly lost some of its vibrancy; in fact, the entire nation felt less vibrant with the loss of what many called the bright light and future. He, himself, didn't feel bright.

Prince Zuko, though, needed something bright and dependable in his life. He couldn't tell the boy he thought his father blamed himself, yet the last thing he needed was the Royal Family blaming his father. Everyone knew the Fire Lord could be quite wrathful.

He arrived home to silence - a silence which seemed normal since the war ended. Except, the war wasn't ended - just a major battle everyone thought would end the war. He wasn't surprised when he found his father sitting at one of the tables looking at some kind of document.

"I met Prince Zuko today."

Akira watched his father look up. "What?"

"I've been selected as a companion for him."

"Aren't you a little old for that?"

"I guess. Grandmother says it makes sense given the fact you and Prince Lu Ten were friends." Akira watched his father sit there in silence. He didn't know how to respond.

"That… interesting." His father looked down at the paper sitting in front of him. "I'm guessing it wasn't Prince Ozai's decision?"

"Prince Ozai?" Akira frowned. "Grandmother didn't say who in the Royal Family made the decision."

"Princess Ursa I guess?" His father let out a sigh. His facial muscles moved as if a thought crossed his mind. "Actually, what I'm going to tell you is to stay between the two of us, but since you're going to be the boy's companion you'll need to be aware of the fact Prince Ozai's never cared for his eldest."

"Why? Why would he have something against his heir? Also, how do you know this?"

"Lu Ten told me. As for why apparently Prince Ozai sees Princess Azula as the child with more skill."

Akira's mouth twisted slightly. "Actually, that might explain something which bothered me. Apparently, Azula's had companions already, but Zuko hasn't."

A silence came over the room, neither willing to speak. Akira stood there, staring at his father, wondering what he should say next. Akira felt things were different between him and his father, nor was he sure how his father felt regarding the request for him to become Prince Zuko's companion.

"So… what did you do?" His father smiled, something Akira hadn't seen in a while. "I mean, what activities did you and Prince Zuko get up to, or are you sworn to secrecy by the royal family?"

Akira's mouth twisted slightly. "That's not funny. Not in the least. We didn't do much really."

He glanced away, not wanting to tell his father he thought the young prince wasn't handling the death of his cousin well. His father though…

"Is something bothering you? I mean other than Princess Azula being favored over the Prince?"

Akira's mouth twisted again. "You blame yourself, don't you? For Prince Lu Ten's death?"

He watched his father's eyes widened slightly, but then saw the man turn his head away, almost as if purposefully avoiding eye contact. Akira watched his hand tighten into a fist slightly. "No."

"No?"

His father glanced up. "There are things I can't talk to you until you're older. Things that I will tell you eventually as you will need to eventually know them. This truth I can tell you now. I shouldn't have come home."

"Did Prince Lu Ten save you?"

"No, but I definitely wouldn't be alive if it weren't for him. That, or I would be still there revenging his death." His father glanced away again. "Let's just say I made a promise to a good friend that I'd do something for him if he couldn't make it home."

Akira glanced away. "What is this?"

"Well, I was actually wondering how I could keep this promise to Lu Ten, but I think you're the answer."

"Me?" Akira laughed. "I'm not old enough to join the army."

"And you won't."

Akira swallowed. "You aren't going to…" His hands clenched at his sides, but his eyes closed tightly. "You're going to use our noble status to get me out of serving. You know…"

"I know full well you feel a profound duty to your country. That is why you will not serve until Prince Zuko is old enough to join, but I suspect he may have to. Though, to be honest I'd rather the war be over before he comes of age."

"That…"

"Your duty is to the prince, Akira."

"Yeah, but doesn't that mean training won't start until I'm older and put me behind."

"No. As a companion to the young prince, you have an important role Akira."

Akira felt a great weight on his shoulders, but his eyes drifted towards the ground. He leaned up against the door frame, but his arms crossed his chest. "I think I got it."

"I didn't expect you to sound so displeased."

"Prince Zuko already has plenty of bodyguards. What he actually needs is a friend. That's what was asked of me."

"I see. No, I shouldn't put that on your shoulders. I didn't mean to. It's something we can discuss later on."

"What would you do in my shoes?" Akira looked at his father in the eye. "What you just suggested, right?"

"Akira, we'll talk about this later. Actually, I think I can tell you what I promised Lu Ten once you reach the age for us to actually decide."

Akira's eyes blinked; he wondered what the importance of said promise was.

_Note – This chapter was not in the original plans, yet I felt this was important for story progression. _


	18. Changes

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Changes_**

The time finally came.

Zuko found himself taking a deep breath when Lady Akira came into the room. He sat in a kneeling position at the front end of the bed with his hands clutching his knees. In some ways, he felt as if he were back where he was when the servants first brought him to the room, yet this time his uncle was there and the only servant was Lady Akira.

"We've not yet trained any male servants for this task due to the fact it is not yet common knowledge. As such, I hope you can bear with me for a day, esteemed Prince Zuko." This was the answer she gave to why she needed to be in the room with him, helping him with something Iroh actually taught him.

Apparently dressing for things such as events that engaged the public to the degree of today's ceremony was a completely different level of dressage.

"Don't worry. I'll carefully explain what I am doing when I am doing it, but your uncle will be with you. That's why he's already dressed in his full regalia. One look at the regalia made Zuko's mouth twist slightly into a pout; the entire thing looked uncomfortable.

"You'll do fine." Iroh reached out and ruffled the top of Zuko's head. Take a deep breath when you need to."

"We're supposed to stay perfectly still when the public eye is on us."

"That…" Iroh took a deep sigh. "Don't overthink things. Just be yourself."

"I guess." Zuko glanced at the ground, knowing full well he would need to face his father simply so the family might save face for what Prince Ozai did. He also knew he would be with the man for a short period of time. He heard Lady Akira say something, yet didn't hear exactly what she said.

When she finished, she grabbed onto his shoulders without messing up his clothing and looked him in the eye. "Good luck esteemed Prince Zuko. You will do fine."

Zuko's golden eyes looked her right in the eye, but somehow he managed to say, "thank you."

Iroh gently took his hand and Zuko followed him out, yet realized he'd moved from the foot of the bed to a standing position as Lady Akira helped him out. He took a deep breath and held onto it as they drew closer to the balcony where the royal family presented themselves to the Fire Nation.

He'd never seen the place before, not even for the ceremony for Lu Ten's death. He wasn't even sure if there was one, or if he was simply too young.

He stood with Iroh waiting for everyone to start into the ceremony which would occur in front of the people, yet briefly, in his mind he didn't understand why this needed to do, this, yet he knew the answer was simple; they were the royal family. His lips twisted, his mind wondering if he would present himself well.

"Do you remember what you're to say and when you're supposed to say it?"

Zuko glanced up at his uncle in fright. They'd gone over the details in the morning, yet there was the fear of messing up. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw his grandfather appear, but he looked down at him while keeping an emotionless look on his face. Despite the man telling him he could do no wrong - that he'd even lost his temper at Iroh in his youth - he still felt as if he might fail.

Then, Azulon's mouth twisted slightly at the corner ever so briefly. "You'll be fine Esteemed Prince Zuko."

"I don't think I remember what I was supposed to say."

"How about instead of thinking about what you're supposed to say you think about what we don't want you to say?" Azulon watched Zuko shuffle his feet. "Zuko, if indeed you mess up with the words you use today and reveal the fact Ozai committed a great grievance - I personally doubt you would - I will not hold it against you, but I will find a way to fix the situation. Simply be yourself."

Zuko's eye darted to Iroh, remembering he'd said something similar. "Okay."

His eyes drifted around, but his eyes finally caught sight of his mother. His mouth fluttered into a grin, yet he found himself glancing away. He still couldn't remember the proper etiquette regarding words for today despite the fact he wanted to. He also knew…

"Zuko."

Zuko's head darted up, but he saw Ursa smile as she held out her hand for him to take. He walked over and took her hand. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Azula glare at him. He took a deep breath, watching his grandfather step forward first when announced. Then, Iroh followed, Ozai and then his mother.

"Traitor."

Zuko's eyes darted over to Azula. He knew she was trying to rial him up, but he hoped the look on his face when he left didn't make him look like an idiot in front of the entire Fire Nation. When they called his name out, he took a deep breath and walked out onto the balcony. He then knelt beside his parents as expected, waiting for the announcement which came after Azula came out.

"As you know, the Fire Nation has faced a great loss with the death of the Esteemed Prince Lu Ten, the son of Crown Prince Iroh, my beloved son. He is now faced with having no heir. As such, my son, Prince Ozai has offered a solution."

Zuko knew this was a lie. Ozai didn't come up with the plan; instead, he insisted he should be the one to take the throne when Azulon died. Instead, the man said, "I, Prince Ozai, am sacrificing my own son, my own firstborn, so that my brother, the Crown Prince will once again have an heir."

Then came Zuko's turn. At first, the words froze on his tongue. "I, Prince Zuko, will become the son of Crown Prince Iroh and the younger brother of the deceased Esteemed Prince Lu Ten."

Except, the second part wasn't part of what he was supposed to say. Iroh went with the flow. "I, Crown Prince Iroh accept Prince Zuko as my heir, but also as the younger brother of my beloved Prince Lu Ten."

"I, Fire Lord Azulon accept the gift my son, Prince Ozai has given, but extend the role of crown mother to Princess Ursa and allow her to retain her role as mother figure to the Esteemed Prince Zuko in return."

Zuko's eyes drifted towards the ground as the royal family left the balcony in the reverse order. Azula didn't let him leave without saying, "you made a fool of yourself ZuZu."

Zuko stood up and left, but stopped walking when Iroh clapped a hand on his shoulder. He saw his grandfather watching, smiling. "I messed up."

"What you said - that will appeal to the people, but also help shape the image we want for you Zuko."

Zuko's golden eyes blinked, watching his grandfather leave. In the back of his young mind he thought politics horribly confusing.


	19. Palace Life

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Palace Life_**

Politics were definitely confusing, yet young Zuko's mind didn't stop and think what he observed in front of him was politics - the internal politics of the palace that is.

After Azulon praised Zuko, Iroh gently took the young prince's hand and started walking past the servants waiting just outside of the waiting area for the balcony in the corridor. Servants weren't an uncommon sight, yet as they stepped out Zuko realized their normal presence was replaced with one of absence prior to the ceremony.

In fact, he'd not interacted much with the servants outside of the ones his grandfather closely assigned him and the few he'd seen attending his grandfather. These servants also didn't act like the previous servants. More specifically, their heads bowed slightly, their eyes not looking him in the eye. He remained silent, not asking what was going on and instead let Iroh guide him away.

The realization hit there was a lot of things Zuko didn't know or understand regarding palace life. In some, ways, he felt his father - his biological father - tried purposefully sabotaging him so he didn't know how to properly function as a member of the royal family.

"That was certainly quite a bit of excitement, wasn't it?"

"Are they treating me differently?"

Iroh let out a sigh. "You are now officially the esteemed prince."

"Oh." Zuko let out a sigh, feeling alone, particularly after he found himself back in his room - Lu Ten's room. He lay down on the bed pulling the dragon into his arms. Letting out a deep breath, he decided he might try his hand at practicing his Fire Bending. The stuffed dragon remained under his arm while his other toy - the one his grandfather gave him - was moved to sit against the small pillow waiting for them to return.

Upon arriving at the training place, Zuko set the dragon down at the side before going into his warm-up exercises while still wishing he'd a chance at a Fire Bending lesson. His movements, of course, ended with him landing on the ground in an embarrassing manner. He took a deep breath, glad nobody was around to see him mess up.

"Zuko?"

Zuko's golden eyes went wide. When he turned his head he saw Akira and Hideki. Hideki's head glanced from Akira to Zuko, almost as if he thought Akira was acting too informal. He bowed slightly towards Zuko. Zuko let out a sigh. He wasn't sure what to say.

Hideki finally broke his silence. "Hello, Esteemed Prince Zuko."

"Zuko."

"What?"

"Just Zuko."

"I…"

"We're the companions of the Esteemed Prince Zuko. That means we get some leeway on certain things."

"I… uh…"

Zuko sat up, his hand brushing the dust off his clothing. He turned and looked at the two hoping he didn't look like a fool. "I've got to get used to calling Uncle Iroh father."

"It's not the same." Hideki glanced away, rubbing the back of his neck. "I mean, we didn't know when they introduced us that you were going to become Esteemed Prince Zuko."

"I was already…" Zuko glanced away, wondering if he'd already said too much. He found himself pulling up his legs and resting his chin on top of his knees. "Never mind."

"So…" Akira spoke, but Zuko didn't look. "Is this yours?"

"Are you kidding? You're asking the Esteemed Prince Zuko if a stuffed toy is his?"

Zuko turned his head allowing him to see Akira holding the stuffed dragon out. "It was Lu Ten's. So was the Tsunagi horn I'm learning from."

"Well, you did replace Prince Lu Ten."

Zuko stood up and turned, his fists clenching together. "I am _not_ replacing Lu Ten!" He reached out and yanked the dragon from Akira's hands. "Uncle Iroh gave this to me so Lu Ten could remain close in spirit. The tsunagi horn is because…"

Zuko's throat tightened. He then looked away, not wanting to bring up the broken promise. He simply hugged the dragon tighter. Akira placed a hand on the top of his head, which in turn drew Zuko's eyes toward's Akira's. "Is something the matter?"

"It's personal."

"Seriously…" Hideki's tone of voice indicated frustration, yet he quickly realized he'd used said tone and covered his mouth. He uncovered his mouth. "My apologies, Esteemed…"

"Doing that way makes it look like you're only apologizing because you don't want to get in trouble with the Royal Family." Akira brought the side of his hand down onto the top of Hideki's head, but his facial features became stern.

"That's not… I really didn't mean…"

The frown on Akira's face twisted into a smile, but he turned his eyes to look Zuko in the eye again. Zuko looked away. "By personal, do you mean something between you and Prince Lu Ten?"

Zuko remained silent but then decided saying something wouldn't hurt anybody. "He was going to teach me when he got back. Uncle Iroh is going to teach me now."

"Is there anything else he promised?"

"He was going to teach me how to properly Fire Bend."

"Wait. You're from the royal family."

"I'm well aware of this." Zuko glanced out the ground. "I'm not sure why you're surprised when you saw the results just a few minutes ago."

"You were attempting a jumping attack. Do Fire Benders actually do that kind of thing at such a young age?"

"You're not a Fire Bender?"

"Well… no."

"I am." Akira continued smiling. "I could teach you some stuff."

"Maybe. Uncle Iroh wants me to focus on breathing."

"Akira, is it actually normal for Fire Benders at that age to attempt a jump attack."

"I've practiced acrobatics, but I've never combined Fire Bending with that yet."

"Why would he be…"

"Because Azula can."

"Uh…"

"I'm not that good. I can't produce a good flame yet."

"Yeah, but that's likely tied to what General Iroh wants you to practice, not a lack of skill."

"I guess. I think he and grandfather are just being nice to me about the whole thing."

"Nice. I can't Fire Bend. Just doing that much is pretty amazing."

"How many people have you seen Fire Bend?"

"Well, plenty. It's commonplace at festivals for starters. But everyone I've seen is an adult."

"Zuko…" Akira let one eyebrow rise up. "Have you actually seen anyone around your age Fire Bend outside of your sister?"

"No…" Zuko turned his head slightly, curiosity getting the better of him.

"Don't you dare think about comparing yourself to Akira. He's older than you."

"Azula's also younger than me."

"Just like Prince Ozai is younger than General Iroh."

Hideki's stared at Akira. "Wait. What does that have to do with anything?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing! Don't bring it up if it means nothing."

"It's more of an interesting coincidence, but it does seem as if Prince Ozai favors - favored Princess Azula."

"If that were true, then why did he _give _Zuko to General Iroh? Why not his favored child?"

Zuko's mouth twisted slightly, yet he didn't want to reveal the fact Ozai hadn't actually given him based on his own free will. His hands tucked behind his back, and he moved his foot slightly but looked away.

"Actually…" Akira quickly changed the subject. "The reason we're here is we were invited for a meal to celebrate your new position as your companions."

"There's supposed to be lots of treats to snack on."

"Oh." Zuko hoped there would be finger foods.


	20. Sunlight

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Sunlight_**

Zuko was like the sun.

In Azulon's mind, the young prince Zuko was like the sun. The child's fiery spirit remained warm and innocent, while his sister Azula's spirit already lost the youthful brightness. The manner in which Zuko got back up and kept trying reminded Azulon of how the sun always rose after a long, cold night.

The Fire Lord also knew Ozai attempted stifling that spirit and instead focused on fueling Azula's flames.

The presenting of Zuko as the new esteemed prince went well - better than expected; he personally felt Zuko's fumbling addition to what he was meant to say actually clenched things, presenting the young prince in the light both the Fire Lord and the crown prince wanted him presented. Zuko was representative of a future of peace after the war.

After the presenting, Zuko was allowed time with his companions before they proceeded into the next steps, yet the servants who served up the meal - men and women Azulon personally picked and trusted - said things went well among the three, although the one closest to Zuko in age felt leery of the privilege of being informal with the current esteemed prince.

In truth, Azulon wasn't surprised, given the fact those selected as companions ended up in some of the most trusted positions when a royal family member got older. As such, they got to see sides of the royal family others never got the chance to see. More importantly, he wanted companions for Zuko who accepted him for who he was.

"So, how did it go?' Azulon watched Zuko fidget slightly. "Your play date?"

"Okay."

Azulon let an eyebrow go up while Iroh attempted holding back his amusement. "Well, that's not what I wanted to talk to you about. This dinner is to talk about your schooling?"

Zuko perked up slightly. "I'll be starting up Firebending again?"

"Patience. There is a plan." Iroh spoke, yet Azulon already made the decision to entrust his eldest with that particular task.

Azulon reached for the pieces of paper next to him and set them on the table. "Your calligraphy teacher has nothing but praise for you. In fact, I am impressed by your penmanship. I'd say that you've actually outdone Prince Lu Ten at this age."

Zuko's facial features fell.

"Calligraphy was not one of his favorite subjects, at least not until he was older."

Iroh lifted his cup to his lips. "It's too bad he didn't use said skills towards romancing a young lady."

Azulon watched a blush spread across Zuko's cheeks. A laugh escaped from his lungs. "Yes. You are at this point too young to be worrying about such things, so don't worry your head over what Iroh actually means."

"Girls are crazy."

"Yes. They are." Azulon watched a disappointed look appear on Iroh's face which in turn made a smile appear on his face.

"I think we can possibly entrust your calligraphy teacher with your literary lessons as well since he already has a good rapport with you. I am a bit concerned regarding your history lessons."

"I…" Zuko glanced down at his dinner, picking at his food. The royal physician who was keeping track of Zuko's food intake scribbled down some notes. Zuko looked at the table.

"Yes?"

"Does this have to do with my performance back then? On the night you decided…" Zuko placed his hands on his knees, clenching his fingers tightly. The child swallowed.

"In part. It really is your worst subject though, according to the records given to us by your teachers. What are your history lessons like? Do you enjoy them?"

Zuko's head darted up, his mouth twisting slightly as he contemplated the answer. He then said, "Azula always answers before me."

"So, am I to understand that you and Azula take lessons together, but that she's allowed - was allowed to interrupt your answers."

"Yes." Zuko's fingers tightened. "Isn't that because I need to become faster with my answers?"

"I wonder. What do you know about the battle of Han Tui?" Azulon let out a sigh. "Zuko, history is also an important subject for a young prince."

"I know." Zuko's hands clenched.

"Anything will do."

"Anything?"

"Anything."

"Okay." The word came out barely audible. Zuko's finger twitched slightly, but he started speaking. Soon, the words came out firmly, but Zuko started moving with said words. Without realizing it, the young prince stood and moved in a manner Azulon recognized. He leaned back slightly, finding amusement at the sight.

Still, when Zuko finished the Fire Lord said, "What was that?"

"Sorry!" Zuko plopped down. "Sorry! I didn't mean…"

"Zuko, what was that?"

"It's the play, Battle of Han Tui."

"How?" Azulon folded his fingers in front of him. His eyes traversed over towards Iroh, wondering if his eldest had an answer for this, yet the crown prince was just as perplexed. "When did you read the play?"

"I didn't read the play. I saw it. With mother."

"Oh? Princess Ursa enjoys plays?"

"It…" Zuko pressed his lips together in frustration. The young prince glanced away. "Yes?"

"I think…" Iroh let out a sigh. "I think Zuko thinks letting us know this will somehow get him and Princess Ursa in trouble."

"Oh. No. Neither of you are in trouble. Why would you think this?"

"I don't know. No…" Zuko glanced down at his hands. "Father doesn't like it when I act out scenes from the plays we've seen. He says mother shouldn't encourage me."

"I see." Azulon remained emotionless. "Well, I don't agree. Do you, Iroh?"

"Your mother's been really good at introducing you to our beautiful culture and the traditions which go along with that, yet your father sadly thinks these things aren't important to our people. Actually…" Iroh took a deep breath. "I think one of the things we want to make clear to you is these things are important to our people's future."

"Yes." Azulon watched Zuko swallow. "Zuko, if you're done eating, you can leave. One of the servants will take you back to Lu Ten's room, but if you need a snack later on, don't hesitate to ask."

He watched his grandson bow, knowing full well the boy was pleased with receiving the chance to escape. When Zuko disappeared and the royal physician took his leave, Azulon allowed himself to sigh.

"Well, I don't think we can say Zuko _didn't _know the answer to Ozai's question that night."

"No. That play is quite thorough, but also not one I'd expect a young child to remain attentive towards let alone completely memorize like that." Azulon's mouth twisted slightly. "Actually, one might think Ursa's purposefully attempting to supersede Ozai's attempts to sabotage Zuko's royal education process."

"Please tell me you aren't going to hold this against her?"

"Never. Instead, I think we should use this to our advantage. Requesting a playwright to write a play isn't out of the question for the royal family - it's in fact considered an honor, yet this may be the best way for Zuko to learn the things Ozai's neglected."

"Are you suggesting that his history teacher be a playwright?"

"Yes."

Iroh let out a sigh. "Now if we can only convince the playwright to go the extra mile. And no, don't think about threatening them. It won't end well."

Azulon glared at his son, yet he knew the task wouldn't be an easy one.


	21. Politics

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Politics_**

The presentation of Zuko going better than Azulon expected didn't mean there wouldn't be any political ramifications he and Iroh would need to deal with.

A few days after the presentation - the same day Zuko had the playdate with his companions and Azulon came up with the idea of introducing a playwright as Zuko's history teacher - meetings with the Fire Lord were requested. He sat on his throne, behind his firewall watching as each person was brought in.

"We're concerned that the young prince is a bit soft."

Azulon's mouth twisted in amusement at this; Zuko's softness was something he was counting on, yet softness didn't mean a person couldn't prove a capable fighter. Princess Ursa herself proved this quite true. In fact, Azulon delighted in the fact Zuko had nothing in common with Ozai. "So?"

"The esteemed prince, he was not given the same rigorous lessons the late Esteemed Prince Lu Ten was. Will he be fine?"

"General Iroh and I are handling the instruction of the Esteemed Prince Zuko. You need not worry regarding whether or not he'll live up to the expectations of the late Esteemed Prince Lu Ten's memory."

"Thank you for putting our worries at ease, Fire Lord. We will let any others who voice the same worry what you have told us."

"Do so." Azulon waved them away, telling them they were dismissed. There was the chance Ozai was plotting behind his back, already presenting Zuko as inadequate for the position he now filled within the royal family. If the men in front of him were in league with Ozai, they carefully didn't let anything slip. "Who is next?"

The servant introducing those with business with the Fire Lord bowed. "Lord Ukano and Lady Michi wish to discuss with you the arranged marriage between their daughter and the Esteemed Prince Zuko."

Azulon let out a sigh, yet gave the affirmative for the two to enter. His eyes narrowed, knowing full well Ozai held Zuko in low esteem. As such, any arranged marriage was done out of the opportunity to build political alliances.

He watched Lord Ukano bow low to the ground, his wife bowing low as well. "Speak."

"Fire Lord Azulon, we are wishing to know if you will honor the arranged marriage contract originally agreed to by Prince Ozai."

"Even if Princess Ursa were to have also agreed, the arranged marriage contract is null and void when Prince Zuko became the son of Prince Iroh."

"Then maybe seek negotiations regarding a new contract between Prince Zuko and our daughter Mai?"

"You may seek negotiations regarding a potential arranged marriage between your daughter and the esteemed prince just like any other parent with a daughter around his age may." Azulon felt his mouth twist in amusement at the sight of the man flinching while his wife sneaked a quick glance at her husband. "Do you really think it is fair that your daughter should be favored for the chance of becoming the wife of the heir over other daughters of noble families?"

"No. It would only be fair that the daughters of other noble families would have the same chance as our daughter."

"Good." Azulon narrowed his eyes. "However, I should forewarn you that any negotiations regarding an arranged marriage with the esteemed prince are the prerogative of the crown prince, his father, not mine. If the crown prince did not agree to an arranged marriage for his firstborn, why would he agree to an arranged marriage for his youngest?"

"To guarantee the bloodline would continue."

"That is a valid reason for the crown prince to enter into negotiations for the current esteemed prince. However, Prince Iroh and I are both aware these negotiations for the other side are a method for a noble family to garner political power. You are dismissed."

The two bowed and left. Azulon let out a sigh, knowing full well he would have plenty of others would come forward over the next few days. He planned on sheltering the young prince from as much of the political aspects for as long as possible, yet he wanted to shelter Iroh as well - not because he didn't feel Iroh couldn't handle the situation, but so he might focus on bonding with his young son.

However, he could also push the requests for meetings back a few days, not to mention give Iroh fair warning. Upon leaving the throne room, he asked a servant if they knew where Iroh was. The information let him into the garden where he heard the sound of the tsungi horn.

He slowly approached, his hands tucked behind his back. One of his eyebrows shot up while the corner of his mouth twisted slightly. Zuko sat near Iroh, playing the tsungi horn, yet playing the instrument well. When Zuko finished playing, he clapped his hands together. "That was wonderful, Prince Zuko. You are definitely Prince Lu Ten's kin."

Iroh glanced up a twinkle in his eye. Zuko didn't react in a negative manner, meaning Azulon picked the right words in regards to comparing Zuko to Lu Ten. The boy smiled up at him. Iroh, of course, knew Azulon was there for a reason. "Is there something you want to talk about."

"Hmm…" Azulon kept his approach soft, yet found himself delighted he might - as the Fire Lord - show a different side. "Do you know a daughter of a noble family named Mai?"

Zuko's face screwed up. "She's one of Azula's friend. The other is Ty Lee."

"You don't seem to like them."

"Azula placed an apple on Mai's head. The idea was to knock the apple off using Firebending, but she purposefully lit the apple stem on fire."

"Oh?"

"I knocked Mai into the fountain." Zuko's face screwed up. "Girls are crazy. I don't get why Azula did that."

One of Iroh's eyebrows shot up, having picked up what Azulon also picked up. Azulon cleared his throat. "Anyways, I'll let the two of you be. Could I speak to you later tonight, Iroh?"

"Yes. I'll meet you in your sitting room after Zuko and I've had our supper."

Azulon nodded his head and headed to the sitting room. He relaxed, reading a book while he waited. Iroh knocked on the door, letting a sigh out as he stepped in. "What did you want to tell me?"

"There will be parents of daughters in noble families seeking out a chance at an arranged marriage with Zuko."

"I decided to let Lu Ten have a choice."

"And I respect that."

"Still, the end result of that choice was less than desirable."

"Was it?" Azulon folded his hands together, watching his eldest carefully.

"Do you know something I don't?"

"Don't think you'll make the same mistakes with Zuko that you did with Lu Ten. Lu Ten was raised with the expectations of participating in the war. Zuko - he is being raised with the expectation of providing our people with a future. Have faith that this will mean things will be different."

"I see." Iroh glanced away. "Is this Mai one of these daughters?"

"Her parents arranged a marriage for Zuko when Zuko was Ozai's son."

"Wait. Zuko's already…"

"Said arrangement became null and void when Zuko became your son."

"And what if Ursa agreed?"

"It needs to be an agreement between the two of you, but I think she'd want the choice to belong to Zuko as much as you want the choice to be his."

"I see." Iroh let out a sigh. "I wish…" Iroh rubbed the back of his head. "Zuko, he's really unaware of the fact Azula likely did what she did because she knew her companion Mai has feelings for Zuko?"

"Well, what girl who knows she's promised to a royal prince not act in such a manner? It's a dream come true for any noble daughter. This said I don't want her to marry Zuko."

"And if she's his choice."

Azulon let out a sigh. "Do you think she will be?"

"It depends on her personality," Iroh said something which made sense. "In truth, we shouldn't punish the girl for the sins of her parents. If we object to a marriage between the two, it must be based on…"

"It can't be completely based on her own merits. Let's say her father should do something which would place Zuko in danger."

"I'd expect any daughter of such a father to cut ties and prove herself loyal to the Fire Nation."

"That would be a good test." Azulon let out a chuckle. "Let's hope such a test is never needed."


	22. The Art of Learning

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_The Art of Learning_**

"When will I be learning more than just calligraphy?"

"Hasn't your calligraphy teacher started you in on your literature lessons?"

"You know what I mean, uncle Iroh."

Iroh held back a sigh, knowing said reaction might be taken by his nephew - now son - as him not taking Zuko seriously. The look of determination in Zuko's eyes was definitely delightful, though letting the young prince know he personally found him adorable was not a good idea either.

"Well."

"Your grandfather and I are actually speaking to a potential new teacher this afternoon."

"But not Firebending?"

Iroh couldn't hold back the sigh. "Zuko, I do have plans for you regarding your Firebending training. I want to get your other lessons situated first."

He watched Zuko's eyes widen. Eventually, the young prince looked away. "Sorry."

"For what?" Iroh reached out his calloused hand and pulled the boy into a hug. "The fact you feel frustrated is actually quite understandable. I'd feel the same way if I were in your shoes."

"I guess." Zuko's thin arms reached around Iroh's waist and hugged back. "I love you, Uncle Iroh."

"I love you too, Zuko." Iroh patted Zuko on the back. "Remember, you have a play date with Akira and Hideki. Aren't you looking forward to it?"

"Yeah. I am. It's nice having friends like Azula does." Zuko's mouth twisted. "Girls are weird. Why do they have to be so crazy?"

"To keep us men on our toes?" Iroh laughed as Zuko's mouth twisted even more. He rubbed the top of Zuko's head gently. "You'll understand one day. I promise. I need to go and have tea with your grandfather now."

"Okay. I'm going to go have tea with Akira and Hideki."

Iroh loved how Zuko's eyes twinkled, yet he saw the same twinkle in Azulon's eyes when he arrived. "How is my grandson."

"Today, he is in a very good mood, but excited about today's play date." Iroh headed over to the tea set and brought it over. "Is the playwright here yet?"

"He is simply waiting for you to arrive. I asked a servant to bring him here once they saw you enter."

"Good." Iroh took a deep breath. "Zuko is already asking regarding his next teacher, though he's focused on Firebending."

"You're still working on his breathing?"

"I plan on taking the next step - or I am hoping to, once we get the rest of his education situated. Hopefully, nothing comes up which will curtail said plans."

"I hope not either."

A knock came at the door right before the servant announced the playwright. The man - one far younger than Iroh expected - stepped in, dropping the handful of scrolls. Iroh watched the man bow, apologizing for his clumsiness as he did so. Azulon remained composed. "All is forgiven. You may raise your head. Join us for tea. Sit."

The young man quickly gathered his scrolls, setting them aside when he sat. His eyes remained glued to the ground, yet Iroh felt as if the young man would rather remain in a bowed position. Not many were asked for such an informal audience with the Fire Lord. The young man's body shook, but then he bowed.

"I'm sorry. If this is about me becoming a playwright because they're exempt from war duties because they provide a service which boosts morale - it's not true, but please don't use me as a way to…"

Iroh glanced at Azulon. The look on his father's face was terrifying, meaning the young man had indeed displeased the Fire Lord, yet… Iroh choose to intervene. "No. Where would you get such an idea that we were going to end the law which allows those providing entertainment to be exempt from?"

"I honestly don't know where the rumors started. I just know there are some among the nobles who feel the arts are a waste of time."

"That's rather disappointing."

"I am sorry I don't know where the rumor started Fire Lord."

"No. I mean it is disappointing certain nobles are pushing for the removal of a stipulation Fire Lord Sozin himself put into place when they, in fact, use another stipulation which gets their own sons out of serving." Azulon's mouth remained in a frown. "You are not the writer of Battle of Han Tui."

"No. That is my grandfather who has since passed."

"I see. I take it that's why you brought scrolls with you?"

"Yes, but if they do not satisfy the Fire Lord I can, in fact, recommend other playwrights for the task."

"Iroh…"

"Yes. May I see what you've written."

"Yes, crown prince." The young man bowed, lifting up the scrolls and placing them on the table.

Iroh carefully opened the scrolls, reading each of the plays, taking a break only to serve their guest tea. After getting through each of the plays, Iroh set the plays down. "You've not written a historical play."

"No. Not yet. They, unfortunately, don't bring in the money for buying food for the table like the other plays do."

"That would be because they're written in a dry manner."

"I understand if you don't want me to attempt such a play given I've not written in such a dry manner."

"No. Actually, I think historical plays which aren't dry in nature would be more to our liking."

"Excuse me?" The young man looked up in confusion.

"So, you approve of what you read Iroh."

"Yes, I do."

Iroh watched the young man glance from Iroh to Azulon, the confusion he felt all too obvious. "What we want are plays which will teach the esteemed prince history, meaning the playwright of said plays won't just be a playwright any more, but one of esteemed prince's teachers."

"I…" The young man's eyes blinked. He then said, "I don't deserve such an honor."

"Are there any playwrights younger than you?" Iroh asked.

"Well, no. At least, none that aren't past their apprenticeships. I think the reason for that comes down to the untimely death of my grandfather, not because I have any talent."

"Well, this is not to leave this room or the classroom, but Prince Zuko also struggles with having faith in his ability. I also think, unlike an older playwright, you will be able to relate to the young prince much easier." Iroh felt relief, but also as if this would work out.

"Yes, if you say, crown prince." The young man glanced at the ground. "Are there any stipulations?"

"Keep things factual, but make the plays interesting. Don't be surprised if Prince Zuko actually memorizes the plays you write. He's already memorized Battle of Han Tui?"

"The Battle of Han Tui? Even the most seasoned of actors and actresses struggle with memorizing their parts."

"I've talked to his calligraphy and literary teacher. He may ask for you to adapt one of the classics into play format, but you're also free to air these plays publicly with our stamp of approval, though these plays must go through the normal approval."

"It will be Iroh who approves them." Azulon added, "Despite this, they will still carry the Fire Lord's stamp of approval as I have faith in the crown prince's judgment, but this is a great honor, writing specifically for the esteemed prince."

"I am honored, Fire Lord."


	23. Frustrations

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Frustrations_**

Not learning Firebending was frustrating.

In the back of Zuko's mind, he knew Azula was ahead of him. The fact she was younger constantly made the situation sting even more. The amount of time spent simply working on the basics wasn't that long of a time, yet Zuko still felt frustrated.

Every so often he asked, but every so often he found himself shut down. Unlike Ozai, there was no ill will involved, yet being told still…

Zuko let out a sigh while he sat at the table waiting for Akira and Hideki to arrive. Waiting meant thinking about the long wait, or what felt like a long wait. Waiting, in all honesty, wasn't a very fun past time, yet there he was waiting.

"You look like you're down in the dumps."

Akira's voice made Zuko's head dart up, but his demeanor quickly brightened at seeing his two companions. "I'm fine."

The older boy's mouth twisted slightly. "Are you?"

Hideki glanced first at Akira, then at Zuko. "I think Akira's right. I mean, something seemed to be bothering you when we arrived." A silence fell over the three, none of the boys wanting to speak first. Hideki finally sighed. "I think - although I'm not really sure of this whole thing - part of our job as companions is that we're supposed to be your confidants."

"What Hideki is trying to say - and he's right about this - is that we're you're companions. That means you should be able to confide in us."

"I see." Zuko took a deep breath. "I've not practiced Firebending since grandfather placed me in Lu Ten's old room." He didn't see Akira's facial features twist-up slightly.

Hideki went with the flow of things, not picking up on anything out of the ordinary regarding what Zuko said. "Not even the basics?"

"I've simply done breath control. Uncle Iroh is having me learn to play the tsungi horn to help with that."

"I see. I guess that would help with breath control." Hideki turned his head towards Akira. "Maybe you could teach Prince Zuko something?"

"I don't know." The look on Akira's face made Zuko suck in his breath. Akira looked him in the eye. "It's not that I don't want to, but this is General Iroh we're talking about. I'm sure he has his reasons, but I also don't want to interfere with his plans given I don't want to mess them up."

"Oh." Zuko's mouth twisted slightly. "So, what are we going to do today."

Hideki's mouth twisted slightly. "Honestly, I don't know. Let me think."

Zuko glanced at Akira, hoping he might have a suggestion, yet he saw the older boy's face twist slightly. "What?"

"Zuko, you mentioned you've not practiced Firebending beyond the basic breathing since Fire Lord Azulon placed you in the late Prince Lu Ten's room, right?"

The young prince froze, realizing he'd slipped up. Hideki glanced up at Akira. "Why is that important?"

"The other day, do you remember how I felt it seemed like Prince Ozai favored Princess Azula?"

Hideki let out a deep breath. "Come on?"

"I don't think I should talk about this." Zuko glanced at the ground.

"Because we would get in trouble?"

"Wait." Hideki took a deep breath. "What am I missing?"

Zuko's mouth twisted. He wasn't sure if he should say anything regarding their family circumstances, particularly when his grandfather asked for him to remain mum. If the circumstances got out, something told him this would cause problems for everyone in the family.

"You becoming the esteemed prince was the Fire Lord's decision, not Prince Ozai's, wasn't it?"

Zuko let out a sigh, then looked at the ground. "I'm not supposed to say."

"Well, I take that as a yes, but that also tells me this is something the Fire Lord doesn't want getting out. That said, we're supposed to be your companions, so you should be able to trust us with something like this - that we won't say anything to anyone."

"Yes. We won't. That would mean bringing dishonor to the position we've been given. Our loyalty is to you."

"I'm guessing there is more to this." Akira's statement wasn't one Zuko wanted to answer. "That said, tell us when you're ready. You're supposed to be able to trust us as we're your companions, but if you're not sure of this, you can always ask General Iroh if it's okay. If he says no, then he says no."

"Okay." Zuko let out a deep breath. "What are we going to do today?"

"We're in the gardens, so why don't we play hide and seek. My dad said the royal gardens are good for this."

Zuko's mouth twisted in confusion. "How…"

"He was friends with Lu Ten, remember?"

"Akira's it!" Hideki took off, leaving Zuko baffled. His eyes blinked, while Akira looked at him, his own mouth twisting slightly.

"You've never played."

"Well…" Except he had played. _That_ wasn't the problem he was facing right now.

"Look. I'm going to go count to ten. You need to go and hide, okay?"

"Um. Yes." Zuko glanced in the direction Hideki took off in. "Was he supposed to take off already?"

"Well, no. This isn't tag. We'll play that next time." Akira turned his back on Zuko, covering his eyes as he did so. "I'm going to start counting to ten now. Go hide."

Zuko swallowed, before hurrying off. In the back of his mind, he knew he'd played the game before - he'd played it in a part of the garden he was far more familiar with than this particular place. The lack of familiarity didn't stop the anxiety from rising, or his mind from hearing Azula's voice purposefully counting and taunting him.

Quickly, he ducked behind a bush and cowered down, closing his eyes. The _it_ was always Azula, nor did she hesitate in hurting him physically in some manner, typically pinching him painfully, but later on sticking her flame right into his face. As such, the few times he did find himself playing said game he, in fact, found himself learning to hide for longer and longer.

However, he didn't know the hiding places in this garden area. Zuko buried his face into his knees, his arms wrapping around his legs. He whispered to himself. "Azula always lies. Azula always lies."

He lost track of how much time passed, yet didn't see Akira approach or call out his name. He did, however, sense Akira reach his hand out for his shoulder, but he reacted by pulling away, back peddling away from the older boy. "Azula! Don't…"

Zuko looked up at the older boy, feeling like an utter fool. Akira's mouth twisted slightly. "Hey. It's okay."

"It's not. I…" Zuko glanced down.

"Azula's not here, but I won't tell Hideki."

"Tell him what?" Zuko felt confused.

"I think you know what I'm talking about. That said, we don't have to talk about that here, right now."

"What now." Zuko felt as if he'd messed up the game.

"We take things one step at a time. If you don't want to play hide and seek, then we don't have to, but since I found Hideki first, you're now it."

"Wait. You mean you're not it anymore?"

"Nope. You didn't know that the last person who's found is it?"

"No. Azula didn't play that way."

"Well, Hideki and I will teach you how to play right, but from now on I'll ask if you know the rules of the game, in case she made up some of her own."

Zuko, for some strange reason, felt better.


	24. Unexpected Play

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Unexpected Play_**

The positive feeling from interacting with Akira and Hideki could only last so long. After a few days, the frustration regarding not learning Firebending came back with a vengeance. He thought about asking Iroh yet settled for the fact Iroh started watching him go through the most basic of postures in the morning when Zuko took the time to work on said basics. This usually occurred right after his lessons with the tsunagi horn.

He didn't feel like he was improving, yet the look on his uncle's face – for some reason he seemed pleased.

"Today you're going to have a history lesson."

The words honestly surprised Zuko, yet he found himself not understanding why his uncle seemed so pleased regarding a subject Zuko honestly felt he was hated. History – he never could return the answers as Azula did. He hoped said lesson would be followed up by a calligraphy or literature lesson. More importantly, he followed after his uncle without question.

That was until they didn't head towards the classroom. Zuko didn't verbalize the question. Instead, he glanced in the direction he thought they should be looking, yet his eyes widened. He then looked back at his uncle who simply smiled at him. They eventually arrived at a room Zuko never saw before, yet he knew the place looked like a theater. "What is this place?"

"The royal family's private theater for viewing plays created for the royal seal, but for also entertaining at times some of the nobles."

"I don't understand."

"Oh?" Iroh sat down on one of the cushions in the room but patted the one next to him. "We're waiting for one other person before the play starts."

"My history lesson's a play?"

"One…" A servant appeared, announcing the fact Princess Ursa was there.

Zuko swallowed, his fingers twisting into his clothing. His mother came in, yet… "Hello, Princess Ursa."

His mother appeared upset regarding how he reacted. A calloused hand clapped down onto his shoulder, making Zuko turn his head towards Iroh. "You can still call her mother. She's _still_ your mother."

The young prince swallowed, this time from the excitement of experiencing a definite feeling of relief. He looked at his mother, yet remembered the fact his mother was having another child. His mouth opened and closed. Ursa walked over, lowering herself onto some of the nearby cushions. "Zuko? Is something the matter?"

"You're…" Zuko glanced away. "Um…"

His eleven-year-old mind didn't know how to ask her. He instead decided he would look her in the eye while he worried his bottom lip. One of her hands reached out and touched his cheek gently. "You are my precious Zuko and will always be. No status change will ever change that."

"I guess."

"Well…" Iroh spoke. "Honestly, I'm not sure what to say, but we do have a short play to watch."

Zuko's mouth twisted into a frown. He turned his head towards Iroh. "How can I learn history from a play? There aren't enough plays in existence to cover all of history."

"That is a good question." Iroh nodded his head. "How about we watch the play. After, we can talk."

In the back of Zuko's mind, he knew he should trust his uncle. That and a quick glance at his mother allowed him to see the fact she was excited about the play. A smile spread across Zuko's face, but his small hand reached out and grasped onto his mother's. The play started, and the story folded in front of his golden eyes which widened with delight. The feeling didn't go away until the end.

When the play finished, Zuko couldn't stop talking, let alone asking questions, at least until his uncle said, "Well, why don't we ask those questions of the playwright?"

"The playwright?"

"He is the person who wrote this play, but also gathered a few actors to perform it." Iroh smiled at his nephew – now son. "I'd asked him to come and talk to you."

Zuko sucked in his breath. The man who came out wasn't old like Zuko expected, but he bowed quickly to the esteemed Prince Zuko. The young prince waited, but then the questions he had – he simply couldn't hold back. They came out, but the man answered every single question, something his history teacher never did.

After all, Azula already knew the answers, but they needed to keep up with her progress through the lessons.

This time, the focus was all on Zuko, yet he absorbed everything the man said in addition to the play which went on in front of him. He also learned the man was the grandson of the man who wrote the play he'd recited word for word to his grandfather. Zuko asked questions about the writing process along with what it was like to have once been an apprentice playwright.

Eventually, all of the questions were exhausted, and the man asked his own. "I noticed you've already memorized quite a bit of that play."

"I…" Zuko's eyes blinked. "It's not something I'd really thought about. When I see a play, it's as if the story is right there in my head."

"I see. Perhaps there is more to this." The man asked another question. "Do you enjoy memorizing the plays you've seen."

"Yes," Zuko spoke with a great deal of enthusiasm.

"What's your favorite?"

"I love _Love Amongst the Dragons_. The play always gets butchered by the Ember Island Players, but I still like the Blue Spirit."

"The Blue Spirit, huh?" The playwright smiled. "Yeah, the Ember Island Players isn't one of the better tropes out there in its current incarnation."

"What does current incarnation mean?"

"What I mean by that is the current generation of the group doesn't stand up to previous generations. However, because of the work of previous generations, they've got a permanent theater, but a following among the nobles on Ember Island when they go there for vacations. Add to this, their troop utilizes the name of the island. My grandfather – one of the things he complained about was the decay of said troupe."

Zuko glanced towards the stage. "Would they be able to perform this play?"

"They're one of the troupes approved by the royal family, but that status doesn't easily go away. They could potentially perform the play, given that is there status. It would depend on whether or not they'd want to pay me royalties to perform the play, but yeah – I think they would butcher said play."

"So, the first showing of the play publicly…"

"Will be with the theater I work with. While that particular theater troupe hasn't had a permanent theater in a while, they are still one of the troupes recognized by the royal family. Since they are the troupe I am connected with, they will be performing the play publicly first while the others don't get to perform said play an entire month. That said, I don't think other theaters will pick this up."

"Why not? I thought the play was good."

"Historical plays are typically like the Battle of Han Tui. The focus is on being factual. For this play, I was asked to break from the typical format. Even with the royal seal status getting the play picked up by other troupes isn't likely as it's not been tried format-wise. There's no telling how an outside audience will receive said play."

"It sounds complicated."

"Yes. It is definitely a complicated process." The playwright glanced over at Iroh, almost as if unsure how to proceed.

"Zuko, this man is going to be your new history teacher."

Zuko frowned. "He couldn't possibly write enough plays to cover all of Fire Nation history though."

"You're right. I think though the main focus should be to keep you engaged with the history lessons as much as possible."

"But, I don't like history."

"The fact you memorized the Battle of Han Tui says otherwise."

"I don't understand."

Iroh took a deep breath. "It's the teacher's fault, not your own that you weren't learning."

Zuko's eyes blinked, yet what Iroh said didn't make much sense. Azula's teachers were considered some of the best teachers, so his failure to learn – it must be with him.


	25. Progress

_Note – I found myself reorganizing the parts until the chapter was the way I wanted._

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Progress_**

"It's not fair!"

Ursa found herself used to Azula's animosity towards her older brother, yet every single time still exasperated her. The way Azula acted wasn't normal, yet in the back of Ursa's mind she knew Azula was quite aware of how much her behavior hurt Zuko; the pleasure her daughter took in the plight of others suffering was something that Ursa did not enjoy. Worse, she saw Ozai take the same pleasure.

Looking at her daughter, Ursa wasn't sure what to say and do; she simply knew something was wrong with the child she couldn't pinpoint, unless one counted Ozai purposefully grooming Azula into the kind of person Ursa now saw in front of her. Her inaction led to Azula acting by speaking her mind.

"Zuzu already got special attention from you, though I can't see why you treat him so well. It should be me being favored by Uncle Iroh and grandfather."

The reason for Azula's current bout of jealousy honestly was honestly Ozai's fault. In fact, there was no getting around the fact Azulon ignored the child Ozai labeled a genius and instead favored the unfavored child. Instead of learning her father overstepped, Azula was instead formulating in her mind the idea she'd lost out on something which should rightfully be hers, or her birthright instead of Zuko's.

The concept of birthright, however, never honestly thrilled her, given the fact her own supposed birthright was how she ended up married to Ozai. Hearing from Azulon himself the fact she'd been wronged by the choices made for her because of her birthright. As such, she found herself sitting near her daughter, having returned from the play presented to her and Zuko, not understanding why Ozai or Azula coveted such a thing.

"He's not special at all."

"Well, I'm expected at tea with your brother."

Azula rolled her eyes. "He's not my brother, remember? Father had to give him up as some sort of punishment, though I don't understand how losing someone as lame as Zuzu is some kind of punishment for father. It sounds more like a punishment for uncle, meaning grandfather must have lost his mind."

"We don't talk like that, remember?"

"It's not as if he can do anything."

The manner in which Azula underestimated her grandfather was appalling, yet even this apparently stemmed from Ozai's grooming of the girl. Thoughts drifted towards her own current predicament – of the child and secret she carried. Azulon's assurances didn't alleviate the anxiety Ursa felt regarding the future of her children. More specifically, she wanted to do something about her current predicament, to have some kind of power in her hands.

She's not sure how she might do this.

"I'm expected at tea." Ursa watched her daughter glare at her, making her wonder if she'd said the wrong thing. Despite knowing Azula was likely to act in an antagonistic manner, her daughter's behavior remained unpredictable; many times it depended on the girls mood.

Azula rolled her eyes. "Whatever. It's not fair."

Ursa let out a deep breath, choosing to ignore Azula for now and instead headed out for tea with Zuko. She arrived, finding her son sitting at the table. The look on his face felt much like the look she'd seen the day she'd watched the play with him. "Zuko, is something the matter?"

Her bright sunshine and warmth looked up, putting a smile on his face. "I'm fine."

Zuko looked away, indicating it wasn't fine. Ursa glanced down at her stomach, thinking what she might do in her current situation. A thought crossed her mind. Ursa looked up. "Zuko, there's something I'd like to tell you."

"Is this about the baby."

Ursa's eyes blinked. "Wait. Did your grandfather tell you?"

"I guessed."

"How…"

"Grandfather told the person who remade my Tiger Monkey toy that he might need to commission him again soon." Zuko continued looking away, yet he didn't seem at all thrilled at the prospect of having another sibling.

"My apologies."

"What for?" Zuko looked at her, the confusion evident on his face.

"For underestimating you like he does. You're smart, very smart, yet quite aware of…" A thought regarding her secret crossed her mind, making her pause in her thoughts. She didn't want him finding out, yet quickly brushed the thought away. "You're quite aware of things around you."

She watched her eldest look away. "I guess."

"Does having a new sibling bother you?"

"Is it my sibling?"

"Of course. Why would you think otherwise?"

"Because…" Zuko took a deep breath. "Uncle Iroh's my father now."

"That's true." Ursa let her mouth twist into a smile. "You, my dear one, are the first person I've personally decided to tell about the new baby. Ozai and Azula don't yet know, but your grandfather figured out on his own. This will be your sibling, but I hope you'll finally get the chance of being an older brother like you want, like you should be. I don't want it to be like how things are with you and Azula, but I think you'll be a much better older sibling that her."

He didn't respond. She wasn't surprised, yet let out a deep breath. Zuko glanced up, a smile fluttering across his face. "Grandfather said I might be able to help pick out a gift for the baby."

"That would be delightful."

The smile faded, his eyes drifting back to his lap. "I don't trust Azula."

"Zuko?"

"I don't want her to hurt the baby, but I can't be there to protect her like I would be if…"

"Your grandfather promised the baby would be protected."

"I trust grandfather."

"That's good. He is a very wise man Zuko. I don't agree with him on everything, but he also doesn't expect me to agree with him on everything. He's treated me, as did your grandmother when she was alive, like a daughter in their household since I came here." She watched Zuko frown.

"Wait. What do you mean by that?"

Ursa's eyes blinked. She'd never told either child how she came to be with their father. "It was an arranged marriage."

Zuko glanced at the table. "I don't want to be in an arranged marriage. I don't want to marry at all."

"You might think differently about it – marriage that is – once you're older."

"Girl's are weird. They do crazy things, but I don't understand them at all."

"I don't think utilizing her sister and her friends as examples of how girls act is a good idea. Azula is…" Ursa sighed, pressing her hands together. "Azula is Azula."

"Yeah. I know."


	26. Stepping Stones

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Stepping Stones_**

Iroh found himself quite pleased with the way Zuko's studies were progressing, yet also realized how frustrated his nephew was at not learning anything beyond Firebending basics. With the teachers for the new esteemed prince in place, he could focus on the next stage of the Firebending training, even though in Zuko's eyes the lessons he would hopefully receive wouldn't likely lead to progress in Firebending.

Of course, _he_ needed to decide he would take Zuko on as a student.

In some ways, he felt guilty. While Zuko was with his old friend – if he did indeed take Zuko on as a student, he would be away doing something he felt he needed to do. The fact he needed to do this was on his mind for some time – before he'd arrived back, yet the reasons for doing so ended up changing as he saw Zuko struggle with his lack of self-confidence. More importantly, he didn't want to fail in making Zuko blossom.

He approached the next step by requesting Zuko pack a bag for travel purposes.

Zuko's reaction when Iroh insisted he pack his bags wasn't unexpected. Thinking back, the only time Zuko was allowed to venture outside of the palace walls was for the yearly family trip to Ember Island. In the back of Iroh's mind, he wondered when he and Lu Ten last visited Ember Island with the family, yet quickly brushed away those thoughts, knowing full well his other reason for the next step.

From the look on Zuko's place, the idea of a trip to someplace other than Ember Island proved exciting, yet in the same regard, Zuko didn't like abandoning his studies, particularly when he was still bothered by the idea that his Firebending wasn't progressing. Zuko's frustrations – deep down Iroh felt bad for holding off for so long, letting all the pieces slowly fall into place as he wanted, yet on the other hand – "_I want what is best for him._"

Iroh watched his nephew carefully, noting how the boy didn't argue, except… "Does grandfather know?"

"Well, yes. He agreed to this."

That was the truth. Explaining why both he and the Fire Lord found _this_ the best solution for Zuko's Firebending problem wouldn't be easy, at least not until the next step was underway. Iroh chuckled, realizing Azula if she were in Zuko's position would argue every step of the way – in fact, the solution for Zuko wouldn't benefit her in any way.

They walked up the long, dusty path to the _place_ where Iroh's old friend lived. Zuko's eyes darted around the place, taking everything in, a small sigh every now and then indicating the boy honestly missed his studies – hopefully his new companions as well. Before they left, Iroh made sure Zuko say goodbye.

Akane filled him in regarding how awkward the situation was, with Zuko drawing lines in the ground with his toe, while Hideki struggled with the fact he'd been chosen as the young prince's companion, his shyness getting the better of him. Akira, on the other hand, took things with stride, reassuring Zuko that Iroh hadn't forgotten about his Firebending training, but to be more sure of himself, not to mention they'd want to hear all about his trip when he got back from wherever they were going.

Zuko's small hand now rested in Iroh's large, calloused hand, while the old man smiled, enjoying the warm sun which beat down on them, fueling their inner fires. "So, I need to let you know that this teacher – I'll be leaving you in his care for a while, if he'll have you."

"What?"

Iroh felt Zuko's hand tighten in his own. "Well, there are a few things I need to take care of, but this will likely be the only time I'll be able to do these things, as I don't trust Ozai not to do something."

"Yeah, but…"

"This person is a good friend of mine who will teach you some important life skills, if you can of course convince him to take you on – and no, I'm not going to tell you how, because that is something you'll need to figure out on your own. If he teaches you, he'll teach you some skills which you can use to protect yourself."

"Because I can't Firebend?"

Iroh let out a laugh. "It might seem that way, since he's not a Firebender and won't be instructing you in Firebending, although I do expect for you to continue the basics every morning. No. His lessons, if he'll take you on will help you become a better Firebender, though it won't seem that way at first."

Zuko let out a sigh, the fact learning Firebending was taking too long, particularly when Azula was so far ahead. He looked down at the ground, his mood changing, his obvious self-doubt starting to show. Iroh let his hand tighten slightly around Zuko's hoping he might comfort the boy. They eventually arrived at the front door. He knocked, the door opening slightly.

"Ah. General Iroh." The man bowed. "I'll let Piandao know you are here to visit, though…" The man paused, looking down at Zuko. "I've not seen the boy before."

"This is Zuko, but I wish to speak with Piandao regarding him."

"You're wanting him to teach the boy? You know that he's very picky regarding the students he takes on."

"I know. I've my reasons for trying." Iroh continued holding onto Zuko's hand, gently guiding him to where the boy would meet Piandao. He felt the boy lean into him while Fat whispered into Piandao's ear.

The man sat down, while Zuko watched. The man sighed, looking Zuko over. "Has the crown prince told you why you're here?"

"He says…" Zuko's mouth twisted. "Father says very little."

"Father?"

Zuko flinched, sinking into Iroh's side. Iroh let out a sigh. "I forgot. You isolate yourself up here, so you don't know what's transpired." He let go of Zuko's hand, pulling the boy close. "It is alright if you still call me uncle in front of Piandao and his buttler."

Piandao continued reading the situation. "So, Prince Zuko, the first question I'm going to ask you is why should I take you on as a student?"

Zuko's eyes blinked, his small hands twisting. "I don't exactly know what you teach."

"Oh?" One of the man's eyebrows shot up. "Swordmanship." Excitement appeared on Zuko's face. "What makes you deserving of being my student?"

Iroh let out a groan, suddenly wishing Piandao used different words. Zuko's jaw clenched, his throat tightening. "Deserving? You want me to be honest with you, or for me to tell you what people expect me to say?"

"Oh? Let's start with _what_ you think people want you to say in this situation."

Zuko's eyes were on the ground, his hands now tightening around his clothing, his knuckles turning white. "I'm the Esteemed Prince and am expected to act in a dignified manner."

"But that's not your answer?"

Zuko glanced up at Iroh, his eyes asking how much truth he could tell the man. Iroh gave him a smile. "Nothing you say here will leave here."

"The truth is, I'm not at all deserving. Grandfather should have picked Azula, not me."

"For what?"

Zuko swallowed. "Can I say what father did?"

"Yes. Here you can say what Ozai did?"

"Father wanted grandfather to give him uncle's birthright because Lu Ten is dead. That is why I am now uncle's child, but I…" Zuko looked down at his hands. "I can't even compare with Lu Ten, let alone compete with my younger sister. She's a protégée Firebender, but I'm an embarrassment in everything I do."

"Yes, but what does _that_ have to do with whether or not you're worthy of being my student?"

Iroh glared at Piandao, placing his hand on Zuko's back. "I'm not. I'm not gifted at anything, really."

Piandao took in a deep breath. "Well, let me ask a different question? Wouldn't you feel ashamed of learning swordmaship given the fact a Firebender is expected to defend themselves with their own fire and nothing else?"

Zuko glanced up, looking the man in the eye. Iroh let out a sigh, realizing this might take more effort than he thought. "Why?"

"Why? You don't know that?"

Zuko glanced up, pondering Paindao's question, then looked at the man. "While I am ashamed of my Firebending abilities, I am not ashamed to admit I need other skills to make up with this. However, I don't think that answers your question."

"Oh, why not?"

"Because _that_ doesn't answer whether I think I am worthy of being your student. I've absolutely no experience in swordsmanship, but…." Zuko's eyes widened, his head turning to look at Iroh. "Wait. That's why you said this would help me with my Firebending?"

"Care to share your conclusion, Prince Zuko?"

"I…" Zuko turned back, worrying his lip, his hands continuing to clench at his clothing. "I don't know how to put this, but …" Suddenly, he bowed his head down low. "I completely embarrassed myself in front of the Fire Lord not once, but twice when demonstrating my Firebending."

"Wait? Are you telling me you actually failed in front of Fire Lord Azulon, yet still attempted another Firebending move?" Piandao's eyes widened, his interest perking.

"Yes."

"Child, do you not understand what kind of bravery it takes to fail in front of Lord Azulon, yet not given up and try again?" Piandao's words made Zuko look up, yet the boy remained quite unsure of where the man was going. "Obviously, you do not, but then, you're so focused on your own failings, you don't even realize your own strength." He turned towards Iroh. "Yes. I'll take Zuko on as a student, but I see why you wish for me to teach him."

Zuko's eyes blinked. "I don't understand. I failed in front of the Fire Lord."

"That may be, but you left a far bigger impression not by showcasing Firebending to the level of perfection I suspect Princess Azula did, but by not giving up." Piandao glanced over at Iroh. "That said. Is Lord Azulon aware of this?"

"Yes. We can discuss that in a bit, when it's just the two of us."

Piandao nodded his head. "I don't take on students who already think themselves great, with nothing to learn from me, Zuko. That's why your answer was so important."

Zuko bowed his head to his teacher. "Thank you."


	27. Lessons in Creativity

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Lessons in Creativity_**

"Your calligraphy…"

Zuko found himself pausing, his eyes looking up at the man who was now his main instructor, and if one really thought about it, his main caregiver. In the back of his mind, he wasn't sure how he felt regarding the fact his uncle left him in the care of his man. Looking at the man, he didn't think to voice the fact he felt abandoned would win him points, particularly when they'd not yet started in on the sword training. "Yes?"

"It's already at this level despite you being at such a young age?"

Zuko glanced away, unsure of how he should feel regarding the praise. "Well, yes."

"You seem ashamed of such a skill."

"F…" Zuko almost called Ozai his father. The word – it started feeling wrong as if he were starting to feel disconnected from the man, yet he wondered – given how the man favored Azula if he ever really felt connected to the man like he did his uncle and Lu Ten, but now also his grandfather. He let out a sigh, placing his hands on his lap. "Prince Ozai always told me it was a useless skill."

"A useless skill, huh." Piandao sat there. "Communication – it is a necessary skill, but we don't just communicate through the words we say. We say it through the words we write as well, but the presentation and how we use those words is important. Say the wrong thing, use the wrong word, and things may not work out the way you want. It is important for the heir to the crown prince to have good communication skills."

"Being able to write the word isn't the same as being able to use the word, though, is it?"

"That is a good question. I think the way we write each word conveys just as much meaning as the way we use words." The man looked down at the paper. "This level of calligraphy skill, I must admit it isn't something I was expecting of someone your age, but then you're a member of the royal family. I'm curious regarding what kind of Fire Lord they're trying to shape you into being."

"I don't quite understand that myself. Uncle and grandfather both say that when I become Fire Lord, the war will be over, so things will need to be different."

"I think that is a good thing. War – war is honestly a disheartening affair."

"Yet you're a sword master, right?"

"Yes. And I have fought in the war. The sword isn't just about killing though. That's why I'm attempting to push you creatively first, so you see the sword as an extension of yourself rather than just a tool for killing, though it's a lot more complex than that." One of Piandao's eyebrows went up. "Something puzzles you?"

"Can Firebending also be used as an extension of myself rather than just a tool for killing?" Zuko watched his teacher's facial features carefully, noting how the man seemed pleased with his answer.

"I'm actually pleased to hear you say that. It might do you good to think of your Firebending in that manner, that you can let it be what you want it to be, rather than letting it be what you think others want it to be."

Zuko pondered what the man said, tilting his head slightly. Mentally, he didn't feel the words were probable, given how there was one way and only one way of Firebending. Everyone in the Fire Nation knew this, yet the idea of making Firebending his own – there was something which appealed to him.

He continued with the man's lessons, which included calligraphy, but landscape painting and dance. His hands didn't touch a sword at first, reminding him of how his uncle held off on teaching him any Firebending skills; he didn't ask Piandao when he would finally pick a sword up in his hand.

Every morning for a week or two he kept up with the lessons, starting his mornings early with his breathing exercises before taking on the lessons in creativity Piando tasked him with. He enjoyed the lessons even though he wasn't sure how _being_ creative would help him in life.

"Today, we start the sword training. You will spar with my assistant, but you will listen to him carefully, but I want you to think – but not overthink – how the lessons apply to what you are learning. It may not come right away, but you simply need to be patient with yourself."

"Patience…" Zuko looked towards the ground. In the back of his mind, he knew Azula took little to no time in learning the things she learned, yet he found himself taking longer to learn everything. "Being patient doesn't mean I'll catch up to Azula though."

"Being impatient will definitely mean you'll never catch up as you'll find impatience will simply cause you to make more mistakes – mistakes you wouldn't make if you were, in fact, being patient to yourself." They were drinking tea, another activity they did every day, but a habit the man definitely shared with his uncle and his grandfather. He didn't understand the habit, possibly because he wasn't an adult. "Do you think your sister is a patient person?"

"Is Azula patient?" Zuko pondered the question carefully. Azula always got her way when she wanted her way, nor did she ever wait. He looked at the man. "I don't think she is. I mean, she's never had to wait for something, not to mention if she doesn't get her way…" Zuko let out a shudder, remembering how his sister always used her fire to get her way, if not cruel words. "I'd rather not talk about what she does when she doesn't get her way."

"Well, I think her lack of patience will potentially get her in trouble one day."

"One day…" Zuko looked at his hands. That one day remained a long way off, just like the one day where he might Firebend with proficiency remained a long way off, as would be the day he became Fire Lord.

"You are now going to place a sword into those hands of yours, but you're going to get a feel of how the sword feels in your hands. That is where you start your sword training."


	28. Unborn Child

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Unborn Child_**

"Is Zuko's Firebending making any progress?"

A sweet aroma drifted around the room, wafting up from the cup of tea Iroh prepared her. Normally, the sweet aroma from one of his teas – or even one Lu Ten used to prepare for her, left her feeling the stress of her day to day life melt away. Azulon never made tea, the task is reserved for the younger members of the family. In the back of her mind, Ursa wondered if Zuko might eventually learn to make tea under the tutelage of General Iroh.

"Hmm…" Iroh cleared his throat while sitting on the cushion, looking down at the pot of tea. "Well, he certainly doesn't think that he's making any progress, although he is." The man held his hands in front of his chest, breathing in deeply. "His breathing has majorly improved because of playing the tsungi horn, which is the first step in improving his fire bending. The next step, working on his coordination, I will be placing into the hands of Piandao."

Ursa's eyes widened slightly upon hearing this, yet found herself somehow sitting up straighter despite the fact she thought she'd already sat up as straight as possible. "Wait? Zuko will be learning to use the sword like Lu Ten? Do you think he'll be skilled like Lu Ten?"

"Eh…" Iroh shrugged his shoulders. "I care not to compare the two."

She felt her heart sink, her eyes drifting down towards her hands. "They're nothing alike?"

"Oh, don't get me wrong. There are definite similarities between the two, but I promised Zuko I wouldn't compare." A sudden smile broke out across the general's face. "But just between the two of us, I'd say both his calligraphy and ability to play the tsunagi horn has surpassed Lu Ten's. Lu Ten would be proud of him. Still, we're not here to discuss my late son, but our dear Zuko. His progress in his studies, I am quite pleased.

She smiled at him, her hands clenching the front of her robes just above her knees slightly. She wanted to say, "_I miss him. I miss Lu Ten as well,_" yet she didn't feel it her place given so many, many things, including the fact Iroh purposefully changed the subject on her. She felt the life in her move ever so slightly, a wave of nausea passing over her – not because of the life growing inside her, but because of the secret, she kept from the man in front of her.

"Oh." Iroh startled, picking up on her reaction. "Are you feeling well, my dear Ursa?"

"Whatever do you mean?" She attempted smiling.

"Oh, my dear. In my old age, it's hard not to miss when a young lady is with child. It's a great joy to let them know how beautiful they are."

Ursa felt the corner of her mouth twitch. "I don't know what's worse. Father finding out and letting it slip accidentally to Zuko – and I'm guessing yourself as well, or you flirting with every pretty female insight."

"I'm old. Allow this old man his indulgences."

"What would Lu Ten say?"

"' Oh, father. How can you be such a major embarrassment to me? I can't believe you're actually flirting with a female young enough to be your daughter. How dare you?'" Iroh spoke in such a serious manner, his mouth twisting into a frown, before breaking into a smile. "And I would respond, 'your mother always loved how much of a ladies man I was' and then encourage him to try and find love of his own."

Heat spread across her cheeks.

"Of course, I never could teach that boy to properly flirt with any female. Zuko will be different."

"I'm sure…" Ursa felt herself choke, remembering quite well a certain someone finding himself quite capable of turning on the charm when the need arose yet also shocked at the idea of her son learning to flirt in the manner Iroh did. "… Lu Ten learned quite enough regarding that matter from you."

Iroh lifted a hand up and lazily waved his hand at her. "I was joking, I was joking. I liked embarrassing my dear boy, but what happened to this subject not being about Lu Ten? We're here to discuss Zuko, but I want to let you know my plans and that I will be taking him away from the palace for a while. You will be so proud of him when he returns, my dear Ursa."

"Yes. I imagine I will be."

Yet, the wait felt tediously long, waiting for Iroh and Zuko to return. The life in her belly stirred and grew. More importantly, she found herself showing more as the child inside of her grew, making her anxiety grow. In the back of her heart, the fear of losing the child ate away at her soul, yet she felt as if Ozai's eyes were on her, boring into her very soul.

Worse, she felt as if she'd lost a child.

At night, they ate as a family of three. Zuko's name never – almost never – crossed either Ozai or Azula's lips, but when it did, a snarky remark from her daughter reminded her even more of the pain of losing a child. "_Quit being so dramatic, Ursa. Azulon promised you were still the child's mother._" Promises, however, didn't change _how_ she felt, sitting at a table without the small child who somehow brought smiles onto the faces of everyone but Ozai and Azula. Instead, she found herself stuck with the child who terrorized everyone she met.

"You don't look well."

Ursa started, rarely hearing Ozai speak up at the dinner table as a course. She worried her lip, knowing speaking of Zuko wouldn't be met well. Ozai never spoke the boy's name, yet a twinkle appeared in his eye whenever Azula spoke poorly of Zuko. Her eyes drifted down to her hands – her pale, pale hands which rested in her lap.

"You and I will visit the physicians tomorrow."

"I…"

"Come now. I wouldn't be a dutiful husband if I didn't make sure my wife was in good health, would I?"

"It's…" Ursa took a deep breath. "It's not anything to be worried about, but I've been meaning to tell you something."

"Something?" One of Ozai's eyebrows shot up. His face remained emotionless.

"I'm…" She swallowed, glancing back down, wishing she'd not seen how emotionless his face was. "I'm with child."

"What?" The sound of lack of amusement from Azula made her look up at her daughter, who'd made quite clear she enjoyed being an only child, although the amount of doting she received from either parent didn't change.

"Oh. Good." Ozai spoke in a monotone voice. "My heir will then have a little brother or sister to take care of."

"Wait…" Ursa felt her throat tighten. "_He knows._"

"I don't hold to that old idea of a female child not inheriting if there's a male child." Ozai – he finally looked up from his food. "You would like a younger sibling to protect and cherish and spoil?"

A smile was on Azula's face upon hearing her father wouldn't favor a male child over her. "Of course. This is _my_ younger sibling and not Zuzu's younger sibling."

"_He knows. He knows and he's doing this to punish me._" Ursa let out a sigh, closing her eyes. "_At least Zuko is out of this nightmare, but this child growing inside of me – they are not._"


	29. Visiting Piando's

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Visiting Piando's_**

"_There are things I can't talk to you until you are older. Things that I will tell you eventually as you will need to eventually know them. This truth I can tell you now. I shouldn't have come home._" The words Akira's father spoke after learning he'd been selected as a companion for Zuko remained stuck in Akira's head. "_Let's just say I made a promise to a good friend that I'd do something for him if he couldn't make it home._" Despite spending a lot of time – time he enjoyed – with the young prince, Akira didn't think anything of the matter.

Of course, a lot of things bothered the young Firebender, including the fact Zuko seemed troubled by his progress regarding his Firebending training. He told the young prince he felt his uncle held off for a specific reason and thus didn't try teaching the younger Firebender anything despite honestly wanting to. He did, however, observe Zuko's basics by going over his own at the same time a few of the times he visited the young prince.

Hideki, of course, didn't see anything wrong with the way the young prince moved let alone breathed, yet the struggles the young prince faced made Zuko's irritation regarding his younger sisters abilities seem even more specific, not to mention the conversation with his father where his father didn't chide him for bringing up the fact he thought Ozai favored his daughter over the young prince.

He ached for the younger boy, knowing how frustrated Zuko was regarding the matter – although he did see some improvements each time in regard to the prince's breathing. What he didn't expect was for General Iroh to show up at his family home one day and randomly say, "I'm traveling to the Earth Nation and I want you to go with me!"

The behavior was… Akira still wasn't sure how to describe the Crown Prince's behavior, yet in the back of his mind he wondered if leaving Zuko alone while Iroh traveled to the Earth Nation seemed as if he were abandoning the young prince and yet another part of the family which didn't care; he'd even noted he'd shipped Zuko off to Piandao as if that were a normal everyday thing. Despite not knowing how to feel, he couldn't say no to stopping by like Iroh requested.

As such, he and Hideki found themselves traveling along a dusty path to a renovated Fire Nation castle. Hideki's mouth twisted into a frown. "So, how does someone whose not a noble come to have such a place."

"Rumor has it the place was abandoned, but nobody questioned it given Lord Piandao's service."

"He's not fighting anymore? I didn't think they let you retire form the Fire Nation Army."

"Rumor has it he defeated a hundred soldiers and thus earned the right to live his life in peace." Akira let out a deep breath. "However, rumor also has it that his ability with the sword and the fact many seek him out as a teacher with him only taking specific students on is another issue."

"You seem to know a lot."

"I did my research. I wanted to know what kind of person Lord Piandao is, given the fact Zuko is in his care." Indeed, he'd taken his time to look into the man, something regarding Iroh's actions still bothering him, particularly with the fact a Firebender should focus their studies on Firebending, yet Iroh openly avoided doing so. Akira still remembered the look of frustration on Zuko's face when the issue came up.

Of course, there was also the fact a Firebender learning the sword was seen as an admittance of weakness, or so he'd been told over and over growing up.

The Crown Prince of all people should _know_ the use of anything but one's own Firebending skill was seen as a weakness, yet he still brought Zuko to Piandao to learn the way of the sword. Zuko likely knew as well, yet his own weakness – he still remembered how Zuko compared himself to his younger sister, noting how the young prince constantly compared himself.

Eventually, the two found themselves in front of the castle and Akira took a deep breath. His hand reached out, knocking on the wooden door, unsure of what he would find inside. An older man answered the door, one of his grey eyebrows shooting up. "You must be the friends of Prince Zuko that Sifu Piandao asked me to be on the lookout for."

"I… yes." Akira seemed taken back by the man, yet when he looked at Hideki he found the younger boy seemingly just as nervous as he. "_Perhaps for a different reason, as it always seems Hideki is nervous._"

"This way. Prince Zuko is currently on one of his breaks from sword training, so the timing is good."

Akira let out a deep breath, following the man, glancing around, worried because he didn't see Zuko. The worry faded upon seeing Zuko out in the open courtyard, allowing his skin to absorb the sun above him with his eyes closed, apparently enjoying the activity. Glancing over at Hideki, he saw a smile spread across the younger boy's face. "Prince Zuko!"

Zuko's eyes widened, his body sitting up straight, a similar smile spreading across his face. "Akira. Hideki. It's nice to see you."

"Your uncle said we should pay you a visit." Akira watched Zuko's facial features falter briefly, making him feel, "_He's also wondering what his uncle is up to. I won't push the issue, as he might find it a sensitive subject._" He smiled at Zuko. "How's the training going?"

"Sifu Piandao says I'm doing well, but he's corrected me less and less on my stance. He doesn't correct me like…" Zuko stopped speaking, and instead stood up. The look in his golden eyes indicated he didn't want to finish the sentence, yet Akira knew he meant Piandao didn't correct him as Ozai did.

"That is true. I'm quite pleased to have Zuko as a student." The sound of someone else speaking made Akira turn his head, his eyes focused on the man with dark skin and dark eyes. Mentally, he noted the informal way he spoke of Zuko, taking it as Iroh having given such permissions. Zuko headed over, a smile on his face, meaning he was doing well, but Akira – he suspected a slight growth spurt since he'd last seen the young prince – that, or the lessons made Zuko stand taller.

He was still shorter than Hideki.

Things seemed well, but then Piandao asked, "Are one of you a Firebender?"

Akira's eyes blinked. Hideki of course spoke. "Akira is."

"Would you spar with Zuko?"

Zuko looked at his teacher, confusion in his eyes. "I don't think Akira knows how to use the sword. Wouldn't that…"

"Firebending. I'd like to see the two of your spar with your Firebending."

The request seemed odd. Akira cleared his throat. "The Crown Prince – he's requested Zuko's Firebending training focus on the basics."

"Trust me." Pinadao lifted a hand. "He won't mind, but there is something I'd like to observe. Have you seen Zuko Firebend before."

"Yes. He's done some of the basics with Akira."

Akira let out a sigh, wishing Hideki wouldn't volunteer the information so easily. He wanted desperately to say he'd seen the basics and note that there was a reason Zuko remained at that level, yet glancing over at Zuko who seemed nervous – he didn't want to insult the younger Firebender. "I'm not sure."

"I will intervene if the need arises. This is simply a sparring match and definitely not an Agni Kai. Again, trust me as Iroh has trusted me."

Akira took a deep breath. "_He says to trust him as Iroh trusted him, yet I don't understand what that means. Still_…" Letting out the deep breath, he said. "Fine."

Of course, he didn't know what to expect when he found himself across from Zuko but then decided to ask an important question. "Have you sparred with anyone before? With your Firebending?"

"Does Azula count?"

"We've discussed this," Piandao spoke from the side. "Princess Asula's idea of a sparring match is not sparring, but mental torture. We do not do that here."

"Then no. I have sparred with the sword."

"Basically, the idea is to use your Firebending against me." Taking a deep breath, Akira found himself unsure of how to explain it further.

"I promised I would step in if the need arises. Sparring for those in your age range rarely if ever gets to the level Azula inflicts on others."

Of course, that didn't sound promising. Zuko looked at Piandao. "Uncle insisted I stick with the basics."

"I'm allowing you an exception this time."

Akira sighed, knowing how clumsy the young prince was. "_It's not so much I worry about hurting him, but his pride being hurt by…_"

"Start!"

He'd not expected Zuko to move with the ease he moved, yet in the back of his mind, something told him he sparred with someone his age despite the fact he knew his opponent much younger, not to mention the fact he knew only a month or two ago how clumsy Zuko was on his feet. He found himself on the offensive, fearing he might actually hurt the young prince, thus getting into a lot of trouble when something unexpected happened.

Zuko brought his fist towards Akira's neck, a blade of flame forming – a move Akria never saw before.

_Note - For those who've not yet noticed, I've added a one-shot to the series which entails what Iroh is up to called "To Lose or To Gain: Iroh's Child - Untrecherous" as it didn't fit into the flow of the story._


	30. Of the Sword

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Of the Sword_**

His muscles ached.

Every morning Zuko woke with the sun, an innate instinct for any Firebender, so he'd been told. After waking up, he proceeded into reviewing his basic Firebending skills until the time for breakfast came. He found himself eating breakfast with Piandao and his butler, taking his time like Piandao and his butler did, never feeling pushed to finish the meal quickly. The morning and afternoon were filled with reviewing the lessons, both in swordsmanship and the task which Piandao made him participate in until his teacher allowed swords to enter his hands.

Of course, Piandao also insisted on not overdoing the lessons, claiming this one of the biggest life lessons he could possibly teach Zuko.

Still, but the end of the day his muscles ached from all the physical activity. He found himself taking a hot bath to make the ache fade, or Piandao suggested letting the sun soak into his skin during the day time hours; he felt alive in the moments his body absorbed the heat. "Why can't I decide what my limit is?"

"You're still young and it is something learned with time, but my job as your teacher and the adult in whom your uncle has entrusted your care is to gauge such things." He then said, "Not to mention, if you overdo it, you'll have more than just aching muscles to deal with. You may injure yourself and need to take a break to heal, or you might find yourself vomiting from overexerting yourself. You're young, so let me watch for your limits for you."

For some reason, Zuko found himself enjoying the daily lessons greatly, and although he felt the lessons were a distraction from learning new Firebending techniques, the distraction honestly worked; the young Firebender anguished over this fact far less than he had before, although wondering what his uncle was doing let alone how much time passed since he was left in Piandao's care did in fact plague his mind a bit, particularly when Piandao made him take a break.

He also missed…

"Price Zuko!"

Zuko definitely recognized the voice, but he sat up straight greeting his two companions, a smile actually spreading across his face. He recognized in the back of his mind the feeling of ease when he was around the two, although in the back of his mind he felt Hideki wasn't so at ease; in fact, Hideki might be more nervous than he was, something he'd not realized. That, or breaking from what was considered proper etiquette was difficult.

He honestly didn't know what to expect upon seeing Akira and Hideki, but sparing with the older boy was honestly not something that crossed his thoughts in the least.

Also, the fact Piandao wanted him to go beyond the basics despite his uncle barring him from doing so bothered him. He didn't plan on going against this teacher and took a deep breath, remembering his uncle reminding him about breath control before the and Akira should start sparing.

He moved first despite the fact Piandao let him and Akira knew when they started, yet Zuko expected this given the fact – honestly, he couldn't explain why he knew Akira would hold back, waiting for him to move first, but then he realized Akira was gauging his Firebending and deciding how he should best react. In fact, knowing Akira was older and more experienced did worry him slightly.

As he brought his fist forward, Akira brought up a hand and blocked the move with quite a bit of agility, or at least Zuko felt Akira moved with such agility, not realizing the same thought was going through Akira's mind. He didn't even notice the ease with which he dodged Akira's flames when the older boy started making his own move; after all, in the back of his mind, he simply thought the ease in which he sparred with Akira came from Akira adjusting for him.

After all, he wasn't in any way talented at Firebending.

Then…

The move came almost like instinct in the fight, but the move felt natural. In fact, not once in the back of Zuko's mind did he stop and think about never having seen the move before as the flame formed from underneath his hand instead of above, wielded in a similar manner to how he might wield a sword. He didn't even realize _what_ he was doing until he saw the look on Akira's face.

Zuko hesitated.

Then, he pulled back just as Piandao started moving in indicating he felt the need to stop the sparring match. The look on Akira's face was one Zuko recognized having seen on his own face after interacting with Azula, which in turn made his stomach feel queasy. He pulled back, stepping away from the sparring match, not wanting to spar anymore.

"Wow." A clapping sound made him almost look up at Hideki, who said, "That was amazing!"

"It…" Zuko's eyes remained glued towards the ground, the words coming out of Hideki's mouth being ones he always heard reserved for Azula in regards to her Firebending. "_It's not true. There was nothing amazing about my Firebending._" Glancing up, he saw the look on Akira's face, watching the older boy look at him – a look which bothered him greatly. His small hands reached up and clutched his arms tightly, wishing he might take back what just happened. "_You can't though. You can't take back things like that._"

"Interesting." Pianadao walked over, completely ignoring the look on Akira's face as Zuko attempted contemplating how Akira felt, along with the fact he may have completely lost the chance of ever making friends with the companions his uncle selected him. He gently took Zuko's wrist and pulled it away from Zuko's arm while he bit lightly into his upper lip.

His eyes took in Hideki walking over to Akira, seemingly puzzled by the look on Akira's face. He said something which Zuko couldn't hear while the hand Piandao pulled away formed a fist… a fist the man turned so he could examine. Akira responded, suddenly realizing slightly, although Zuko suspected this was to put Hideki at ease. He decided then to focus on his fist.

"Do you think you can do that again?"

"Again?" Zuko choked out the words, unsure of whether he wanted to do that particular word again.

Piandao gently pried the fingers of Zuko's hand apart, making Zuko look at the palm of his hand. "I think you've come to realize that fire and the sword is meant to kill, haven't you? It's not a pleasant thought, is it?"

"No."

"Neither are just about taking life though." Piandao's voice remained soft, Zuko's eyes drifting over to Akira, who seemed slightly nervous. The man took his other hand and took Zuko's chin, making him look in the eye. "Pay attention."

"Yes… sir." He still felt sick to his stomach.

"Fire isn't just destructive, just like the sword isn't destructive. The sword is used to protect while Fire is life."

"Fire is life?"

"It's something which has become forgotten, but yes. Fire is life." The man let go of Zuko's chin and hand then looked over at Akira. "Are you worried about your friend?"

"He's not my friend." Zuko worried his lip some more, his eyes drifting to the ground now that Piandao didn't make him look him in the eye.

"He's not?"

"I'm not that lucky, and…" Zuko didn't finish saying the fact he'd likely ruined the chances.

The man touched the back of his head lightly. "The solution to this problem, my dear student, is to go and talk to him, not avoid the situation.


	31. Of the Flame

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Of the Flame_**

A chill ran down Akira's spine despite the heat of the flame at his neck. His mouth opened slightly, his mind still mentally taking in the sight of a move he'd never seen before, let alone never heard of. In the moment or the flurry of moments, Akira's mind didn't register the fact Piandao's hand gripped Zuko's wrist, let alone the look of horror on the young prince's face even after they stepped away, conversing with each other.

The first thing Akira's mind registered outside of the events which transpired when he sparred the young prince was hearing Hideki say, "Wow", followed closely by, "_That was amazing._"

"_There's no denying the fact what Zuko did was amazing, but…_" Akira continued staring at Zuko. "_I know Prince Iroh held back on Zuko's training. I know he has, so…_"

"Is something the matter?"

Akira's eyes blinked, mentally registering the voice of Zuko's other chosen companion. He turned his head, noting the look of worry on Hideki's face, making him realize all to quickly the shock of what just transpired likely appeared clearly on his face. "No. Nothing's wrong." Yet, in the back of his mind, he kept thinking over that one particular thought. "_I know where Zuko was, but that his training was being held back, so how…_"

His eyes opened and closed, carefully taking in how Piandao interacted with Zuko, watching the man lift his chin, almost as if to command Zuko's attention for some reason, but not long after the young prince approached them, worrying his bottom lip making it all too obvious he too found himself bothered by the situation. Zuko's eyes darted away, one hand reaching up to clutch the sleeve of his arm. "Akira?"

"I – yes?"

"Sorry." The words made Akira's eyes blink, but then Zuko followed up with. "I'm…

"Stop." Akira felt his chest tightened slightly, feeling completely agitated with the current situation despite the fact he couldn't place a finger on what actually bothered him. "_I do know he shouldn't be apologizing. After all…_"

"Wait. I don't want things to be…" Zuko glanced down at the ground, his fingers tightening even more on the sleeve of his clothing specifically picked out for training at Piandao over any preconceived royal etiquette.

"…_quite a few Fire Bending masters would laud praise on Zuko if he were the student._" A brief thought crossed his mind. "_Jealousy. No, that…_"

"I want to be friends, but I don't want them the same way Azula…." Akira's eyes blinked, his mind instantly going back to the conversations he held with Zuko regarding the young princess; Azula made and kept friends through fear and intimidation, so without out outright saying what he meant, Akira knew Zuko was trying to say, "_I'm sorry I scared you._"

Except… "You didn't scare me."

"Then why?"

"It was unexpected." That answer definitely felt like the right answer, given the fact he'd not expected the move from Zuko, who prior to coming here struggled with the basic movements of Firebending, yet now…

"That can't be right."

Akira's eyes blinked, his focus o the top of Zuko's head. "Why wouldn't it be?"

"I mean, I'm not good…"

"It looked good to me." Hideki piped up. "Akira is older than us, right?"

"Yeah, but…"

"Stop comparing yourself with Azula." Akira knew his voice sounded stern, yet in the back of his mind arguing Azula as the better Firebender in the manner Zuko did, even came to perceive didn't feel right. "_Of course, I've never…_"

"You've never seen her Firebend."

"No. I haven't." Akira let out a sigh. "I've also _never_ seen that Firebending move before."

"I…" Zuko's free hand reached up and rubbed the back of his neck.

Akira tilted his head, contemplating the fact Zuko seemed just as off guard regarding the move. "_He did that on instinct and instinct alone._"

"You've never seen it either?" Hideki piped up. Glancing over at Hideki, the non-bender was definitely out of his element. He cleared his throat, placing his hands behind his back and rocking back and forth while his eyes drifted down to the ground. "Does this mean Prince Zuko created a new Firebending…"

"No!" Zuko lifted up his hands, palms forward, his eyes widening in horror. "Only Firebending Masters create their own moves. I am _far_ from being a Firebending Master."

"Be it as that may…" Akira's mouth twisted slightly. "_Something feels off. I mean, it is true that he is not a master yet, but he is right in saying that only masters of their elements create their own moves, the exception being…_" Akira's eyes blinked. "Oh."

One of Piandao's eyebrows shot up. "You seem to have come to some kind of conclusion on your own."

"Could…" Akira's mouth twisted into a frown, wondering how he might broach the subject with the man without worrying Zuko, or getting Zuko denying what Akira suspected. He reached out a hand and ruffled the top of the younger boy's head. "It's alright."

"No, it's not."

"Yes…"

"I could have seriously hurt you."

"You didn't."

"Only because Piandao stopped…"

"While I did find myself grabbing your wrist, it ended up not being necessary. You were more aware of what was going on than you think."

"Still…"

"I don't want you to worry about this." Akira let out a deep breath. "Though I doubt you won't, so you promise to talk to me about it?"

"Yeah, but…"

"Akira says it's not a move he's ever seen." Hideki piped up. Akira speaking reminded him the other boy was there. He watched Hideki shift from one leg to another nervously, almost as if he felt out of place.

"_He probably does given he's not a bender._" Akira let out a sigh. "Could I possibly talk to you? Ask you a few questions?" He watched Zuko's face twist slightly, becoming just as nervous as Hideki. "I mean, You did speak with Zuko's uncle before he left, right? This, this is what you both expected, wasn't it?"

"Yes."

Zuko's eyes blinked his mouth opening, watching Piandao smile.

"Normally I'd have my students forge their own blades once they finish training, but I'd argue you've already done that Prince Zuko, not to mention I think it appropriate you actually inherit the set of blades which Lu Ten made under my instruction as that is what both he and Prince Iroh would wish to occur. Why don't you, Fat and your other young friend work on preparing lunch while I answer the questions of your friend here."

"I…"

"I believe he's curious regarding what is expected of him going forward."

"Zuko…" Akira smiled at the boy. "I am not just your friend, nor am I just your brother in bending, but I am one of your chosen companions. As such, it is my job to protect you. I need to know how to go forward with that, and I can't do that unless my questions are answered."

"So, none of my business?"

"That…"

Hideki reached out, still looking rather nervous, his fingers tugging on Zuko's sleeve; it felt like an improvement, given his fellow companion struggled with the idea of treating Zuko normally. They both followed after the man named Fat and Akira turned to look at Piandao.

"So…"

"I'm guessing you're already suspecting that learning to wield the blade _was_ in fact Firebending training for the young prince?"

"Yes." That was one question out of the way. "Is Azula really a prodigy?"

"Now, why would you think that?" The man then said, "Isn't that what everyone is saying?"

"That is what Prince Ozai says. That is what Zuko says. Her Firebending, from what he's told me is powerful, but…"

"In that aspect, she is a genius."

"Yet she's not created her own move like Zuko has, which is from my understanding the true mark of a prodigy."

"What if I told you Fire Lord Azulon and Crown Prince Iroh would agree with you?"

"Yet, there are other things, like the fact Zuko's Firebending up until now…"

"Is considered a contradiction, right?" Piandao's mouth twisted in amusement. "I've seen it with some of the ones which approach me asking to be their master in sword training. They tell me they are gifted because of some reason or another, yet I learned a long time ago simply saying one is good at something doesn't make it true."

"That doesn't answer my question."

"I've also seen students other sword masters would never touch because they can't see the untapped potential. Ozai focused in on the power behind Azula's bending and neglected the child whose bending was weaker, not once noticing Zuko's strengths. With Azula, he's received quick results, but quick results don't mean accurate results let alone a student who understands what the teacher is trying to teach."

"That doesn't help."

"I think it's something that will become more apparent over time." Piandao's mouth twisted slightly, a frown forming on his face. "Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if Princess Azula is never truly recognized as a true master. A master never actually stops learning, but Azula will hit a plateau one day in what she can do because her training's been focused on power and power alone. It's like how she is a prodigy in some ways, but in other ways not.

_Note - To quote something Azulon said back in chapter five, "while she is a prodigy in certain things - memorizing and replicating moves, the power behind her bending - comparing her to myself is an absolute joke. Learning Firebending in the new manner is child's play in comparison to the way of old."_


	32. Rice Balls - Fireballs

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Rice Balls - Fireballs_**

"So, none of my business?" In the back of his mind, Zuko found himself wondering if – indeed – Akira's job of protecting him wasn't any of his business; after all, his protection definitely involved him, yet he also found himself bothered that protection was one of Akira's jobs, given the fact the young man wasn't simply a companion, but a friend.

A tug at his sleeve made Zuko's attention turn towards Hideki, whose mouth twisted slightly, but without questioning or waiting for Akira's answer – the older boy paused, as if unsure of how to answer the question – he followed after Hideki and Fat into the kitchen area of Piandao's place. When they arrived, the man set both boys to shaping rice balls with fire flakes embedded in them while Fat prepared the other items.

Zuko set his mind to the task, listening to the instructions Fat gave and attempting to do as said; as such, when Hideki spoke, he'd not expected word one. "You and Akira are amazing."

"Not really. I mean…" Zuko continued forming his third rice ball in his hands, the fire flakes of what he hoped was a decent distance apart from each other in the rice. "Yes, Akira is amazing."

"You are as well," Hideki said, making Zuko want to protest what the other boy said. "I'm not."

"You're…" Zuko paused, unsure of what kind of trait made Hideki stand out. His head tilted, remembering how of his two companions Hideki struggled with calling him simply Zuko.

"See. You can't say anything, can you."

"But I can't say the same thing about myself."

"You just came up with your own Fire Bending move though. How can you say that's nothing?"

"Because…" Zuko took a deep breath. "Did I? I mean, I did it instinctively, so can I say it is definitely a move I've created until I can do that at will? Can I call it a move I created until I've perfected it?"

"That's a good question," Fat piped up. "Can I also trust you to make the tea, Prince Zuko."

Zuko's eyes widened. "The tea?"

"Hasn't Prince Iroh taught you yet?"

"No…" Zuko looked down at his fourth rice ball.

"You've also already made more rice balls than me."

"You shouldn't compare…" Zuko started saying, but then he stopped, thinking back to how many times Akira told him not to compare himself to Azula. He took in a deep breath. "If I'm not supposed to compare myself to Azula, then you can't compare yourself to me."

"That…"

"Prince Zuko is correct. Each person is their own individual, but just because you've not discovered your purpose yet…"

"But isn't my purpose the same as Akira's?"

Zuko felt himself freeze, remembering his thoughts earlier, even the question. "_So, none of my business?_" The fact both of the young men who were supposed to be his friends were also meant to be his protectors – it honestly didn't seem right. He took a deep breath, his young mind trying to contemplate an answer to Hideki. Nothing came, at least not right away.

"He's already asking Piandao what he can do to better protect Pr…" Hideki paused, then said, "Zuko. I've not even begun to think of that, but I doubt I'll ever be as physically strong as him, nor do I think I could wield swords like Prince Zuko."

"I just want to be friends." Zuko started into his fifth ball. Hideki stopped speaking and Zuko stopped forming the balls, wondering if it was the right answer. Glancing over at Hideki, for some reason, the look on the other boy's face said it wasn't the answer, but he felt like he needed to clarify. "I've never had a friend before."

"Yes, well…"

"Azula was allowed to have friends, though…" Zuko went back to forming the rice ball. His eyes looking up at Fat. "Do you think you could teach me how to make tea? It might not be like Uncle's, but it might surprise him?"

"Don't change the subject. Please."

"I wasn't. He asked if I could make tea, and we'll be finished making these soon."

"Perhaps you should both learn to make tea?"

"I don't understand." Hideki let out a deep sigh.

"I wouldn't call Mai and Ty-Lee friends. Not when she tortures them as much as she tortures – tortured me. I want to… honestly, I'm not sure what the purpose behind forming friendships is, but I know they're important and I know I want companionship. I don't want it to be like what Azula has with her companions. I want something else."

"That's why the two of you should learn to make tea. Prince Zuko because this is something which would please both the Fire Lord and Prince Iroh, and Hideki – you should learn the making of tea because the person making the tea for the royal family – that is an important position to hold as it means they have great trust in you to not poison them."

Zuko glanced up at Hideki, forming yet another rice ball. The young man seemed quite unsure of himself still. "That still doesn't seem as important of a task as protecting the Esteemed Prince."

"Yes, but the person whose job is to protect one of the royal family needs the help of someone who has ears where needed, but who will go unnoticed by others so that said person can relay that information to them so they can act upon said information. There is nothing wrong with having strengths in a different area than what society normally accepts as being strengths."

"But what…"

"It's something everyone needs to find for themselves. For example, I discovered I excel at cooking, which earned me a place as Piandao's student," Fat explained, smiling at the two boys.

The conversation ended there, with Hideki still looking as if he were still bothered by the question plaguing his own mind. Zuko, on his own, wished there was some way of making him feel better, yet he also remembered how nothing others said helped. Even now, he doubted himself. When they finished the fireballs – Zuko decided to call them, even felt they might already be called – Fat taught the two of them how to make tea.

Not that this made him understand his grandfather and uncle any better, or understand anything his uncle said regarding tea which seemed like hot water with herbs added. The preparations for lunch ended and they headed towards the place everyone usually at their meals, Zuko's mind still running over his thoughts.


	33. Play Time

**To Lose or to Gain: Iroh's Child  
****_Play Time_**

The eating of the meal started off without much fanfare – nobody spoke, the sparring match still setting in for everyone sitting and eating the prepared lunch. Zuko wondered in the back of his mind if things changed at that moment, an odd thought. "_A lot of things are changing though. Lu Ten died. I became Uncle's child. I've got new teachers. Mother is having a child. I learned sword bending. I've made new friends._" Words started slipping from his tongue. "I've…"

When he paused, having caught himself off guard, Akira spoke. "Something the matter Zuko?"

"No." The corners of his mouth twisted, unsure if he should say out loud, "_I've made friends and it feels good I don't know how all of these things work._"

"It does seem like you are in a good place though."

"Yes." His eyes drifted over suddenly, remembering Hideki wasn't in a good place.

Akira noticed. "Hideki? Are you alright?"

"I'm – yes." The boy glanced up, attempting to put a smile on his face. He fidgeted slightly while the two adults watched carefully.

When they came close to finishing their food, Piandao said something which majorly perked Zuko's attention. "I've heard from your uncle you are into theater Prince Zuko."

"Yes! I love it." Hideki glanced up at Zuko's, his eyes blinking in surprise before looking over at him, his mouth agape.

"The local theater is putting on a play tonight."

"Are you suggesting we go?" The words blurted out, but Zuko couldn't hide his excitement. Hideki glanced now at Piandao, his mouth opening slightly more.

"Wait…" Akira spoke with a firm tone, but the look on his face said he wasn't pleased. "Are you _sure_ that is a good idea? I mean, this is Prince Zuko we're talking about?"

"Which is why neither one of you will refer to him by his given name while you head into town."

"But…" Hideki rocked backward slightly, his mouth tightening; in the back of Zuko's mind, he remembered how much Hideki struggled with just calling him Zuko.

"_Wouldn't him calling me by something else as 'sifu' points out be even harder._"

"It's your duty to call Prince Zuko by whatever name we come up with." The man looked Zuko in the eye. "Do you have an idea of the name you want to use?"

"Lu Ten?" His mouth snapped shut, but he definitely felt a slight heat across the skin from the embarrassment of suggesting. "That – that was dumb."

"Um." Akira's mouth twisted as if pondering the choice.

"Well, it isn't unheard of for parents to name their child after a member of the royal family for good luck."

"Is it?" Akira didn't seem convinced of what Hideki said.

"Yes." Piandao's interest seemed perked, but then he said, "To a point."

"To a point." Zuko repeated the words, completely unsure of what the man actually meant by this. "It was just a dumb idea."

"Well, do you have any other ideas what you want to be called while you are out and about?"

"Not really." Zuko's mind drifted, wondering why he'd picked Lu Ten's name of all things. The fact he admired his cousin a lot did play a factor, but so did the fact Lu Ten's death remained fresh in his mind. The choice felt obvious, too obvious.

"Isn't that the most obvious choice?" Akira said out loud. "I mean, wouldn't someone expect that to be the name Zuko might use?"

"Sometimes going with the most obvious choice ends up being the lest obvious choice, not to mention the fact I doubt anybody knows Zuko isn't at the palace right now."

"F…" Zuko paused, the use of said word suddenly feeling like a strain on his tongue, something which didn't feel right. "Prince Ozai doesn't know?"

"He shouldn't. While it is true there are a few more servants involved in your life, there isn't anyone the Fire Lord and Crown Prince don't trust among them, but limiting your interaction at this point as you're still considered transitioning into your new position isn't being questioned."

Zuko's bright golden eyes widened slightly, his mouth opening ever so slightly. "I'll be interacting with more individuals eventually?"

"Well, yes."

The young prince let out a sigh, but then let his mind refocus on getting to go out and see a play much in the same manner he would if they were visiting Ember Island; in fact, he'd find himself attending a theater production performed by a theater group he'd never seen before. The name became brushed aside and nobody thought about the use of said name anymore, though the look on Akira's face said he was still bothered by the choice.

Instead, the focus became on the play, which Zuko found himself quite excited about, unable to not pipe up ever so often regarding the theater. Akira's facial features twisted in amusement, while Hideki's mouth opened, his eyes wide for some reason. They found themselves in a small theater, while Akira looked around. The older boy then said – his voice just a whisper, "You've actually been in a public theater before?"

"Yes."

"When?" Hideki asked.

"With my mother. She loves the theater, but we always go – went, during the summer on Ember Island."

"There are quite a lot of theaters there, aren't there?"

"Wait. There are?" Akira sucked in a deep breath. "It's not ever been something which interested me. I mean, I've never thought…"

"The plays starting!" Hideki hissed, while Fat let out a chuckle. Akira's mouth snapped shut.

The play – the play was engrossing to say the least, although there were some issues Zuko noticed. After the play, they slipped from his tongue, but then he noticed Fat and Akira had disappeared.

"Hideki?"

"Yes?"

"Where did Akira and Fat go?"

"They went to get us something to eat."

"Akira was a bit lost with everything I was saying, wasn't he." Zuko glanced at his feet. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Hideki fidget a little, almost as if he was bothered by the fact Zuko's attention was focused on the older boy. Zuko held up his hands. "Not that you aren't worth talking to. I just…"

"Just what?"

"I don't want to overdo it, you know. Annoy someone by talking about theater so much."

Hideki's eyes blinked. "But you like the theater, don't you Lu Ten?"

Zuko's eyes blinked, taking in the fact Hideki actually referred to him as Lu Ten. His mind contemplated the reason Hideki found it so easy to break from formality then realized maybe this was easier because keeping his identity secret was in itself a form of formality.

"Sorry, I…"

"Don't apologize. I was just surprised."

"By what?" Hideki's eyes blinked. "You mean when I called you…" He then said, "That is your name, is it not Lu Ten."

Zuko smiled, wanting to say Hideki might make a good actor in the theater when a laugh came from behind – a laugh which reminded him too much of the way Azula at times laughed as if the person was taking merriment at the idea of causing another person pain, but the way Hideki's facial features faulted – he felt the other boy felt the same way.

Whoever laughed spoke from behind. "Your name is Lu Ten?"


End file.
